The Twisted Realm of DTM

699 - Fanfiction Repost: DinoThunder - The Will To Live - PART 8

2012-02-14T18:33:00.001-05:00

One post short of seven-hundred? For shame... but yeah, that's the rest of my sole DinoThunder entry. Will attempt to squeeze more of this in the near future.

Disclaimer: The author would like to clarify that Power Rangers and its characters is owned by Saban Brands and not the author.

"Hello?" Billy's groggy voice replied on the other side of the phone line.

"It's me, Bill," Tommy said, a hint of bitterness underlying his somewhat calm tone. "Sorry to wake you, but I'm going to take the temporary solution." As he said it, he picked up the vial with the faint pink liquid and stared at it. "At this point, I can't afford to give up my morphing abilities just yet. Not this far in the game anyway."

In a way, he hadn't lied in his response. He still had unfinished business with Mesogog and his minions; it was only natural that he would personally oversee this conclusion as well as help his own team of Rangers mature in skill and life. But there was also a selfish motive lingering in his thought process. All these years, Tommy knew that he could easily get back in the game whenever the situation called for it. Once he took the permanent solution, not only would his ailment be gone, but also his ability to morph. No morpher or other transformation device would be compatible with him.

"I'm sure it hadn't been an easy decision," Billy said, somewhat understanding what Tommy was going through, as he had once been unable to accept the Gold Ranger powers due to an absorption of particles years ago. "But you'll get over it in time."

"True," agreed Tommy, "So do I just drink this or what?"

"Yeah. Drink it all in one shot."

Tommy did so and, after having digested the formula, immediately hung up the phone without saying goodbye. Upon realizing this, Tommy thought of calling again and apologizing, but decided it wasn't worth keeping Billy from much needed sleep. Besides, it didn't really taste all that good anyway. After a moment, Tommy made his way to bed and fell fast asleep, his last thoughts pondering to the cure he digested. It was only a temporary fix, he was told. Even Billy, who had developed the formula, didn't know how long it would last, but Tommy was confident that it would be more than enough to conclude his business with Mesogog.

So for the next several months, the temporary formula had held up. It held up long enough for Tommy and the Dino Thunder team to defeat Mesogog once and for all. Unfortunately, the powers were extinguished as a result of the Dino Gems being exhausted in the midst of a final battle, but Tommy didn't mind. It just meant that his long life as a Ranger was finally over... really over...

For good.

Shortly after the battle ended, Tommy took his leave from the other Rangers and their reporter friends, who had discovered the truth and decided to share what they know with no one. Tommy smiled at the thought as he drove his black jeep back home; Cassidy and Devin reminded him of another bumbling pair he knew who turned out pretty good despite all thinking the contrary. Pushing thoughts aside, he continued towards his house on the outskirts of town and parked in front of the driveway. On the outside, the house didn't look like it had been attacked or anything. Tommy was glad for it, since he wasn't sure if a monster attack was part of the insurance policy.

Instead of getting in through the house, he made his way to a cave close by which served as a secondary entrance to the Dino Base. The scorch marks, faint smoke trail, and the open hole on the solid rock wall were the first signs that Zeltrax went through this passage and destroyed everything in his path. As Tommy stepped through the room, he survey the destruction done. Just about all the electrical equipment was beyond salvaging and most of the paperwork had been burned away by the rampant fires. Despite years of research and archiving, Tommy wasn't concerned with any of that. He immediately made his way, walking over fallen debris and wiring, to the gray locker. The locker was still in fairly good shape despite the mayhem. He opened the locker and was relieved when he saw the contents inside were relatively untouched.

The vial - containing the solution which would cure his ailment and diminish his morphing compatibility - was still intact. One of the few things to survive Zeltrax's massacre, the others being the set of discs containing the entire Ranger database and the secret compartment containing the last remnant of the original Morphing Grid. Tommy took the vial from the rack and took one last glance at what was left of his underground lab. His mind shifted back to great glories during his long tenure as a Power Ranger and the moments that have come from them. He reflected on his greatest gains and losses, thought of the friends he had gained and lost, and wondered if it was truly time to give it all up.

And then his mind shifted back to that other Thomas Oliver he met in limbo; a man who had lost so much in his life that he dedicated himself to the cause to an almost frightening degree. A man who looked to live up to the legend and the greatness that others bestowed upon him. It was the kind of man that Tommy had, at one point, aspired to be, but never could be... and once he takes the cure, he'll probably never get the chance. It hit Tommy with a stark realization, but something else made Tommy aware of what that Thomas Oliver represented... and in some strange way, it was that one something that made Tommy more sure about what he was about do to now in the here and now.

Part of him didn't want to take the formula, despite the consequences. He wouldn't mind sacrificing a longer lifespan if it meant making a difference in a role he felt truly comfortable with. But another part of him was saying that maybe it's time to hang up the morpher and let others continue their work. Maybe there was a reason he decided to stay quiet for a long period of time, save for a few choice circumstances. It took Tommy a long time to sort out his feelings on the matter, but decided that maybe it was for the best that he moved on. And with that, Tommy drank the formula in one shot. He was quite pleased not only with his decision, but also with the more-pleasing taste of this formula.

"And so it ends."

Tommy heard Hayley say as she dropped in from the house entrance. He couldn't help but chuckle at the thought as he tossed the vial aside. "Yep, it's all over for me. Time for a good night's sleep."

"And if the threat of Universal Armageddon looms over the world again?" inquired Hayley.

Tommy shrugged his shoulders, leaning against a tilted support. "Let someone else handle it. As far as I'm concerned, I am retired as of this moment."

Hayley raised an eyebrow, walking towards the now-former Ranger. "As in real retirement where you stay retired or as in pro wrestling retirement where you say you're retired but come back after six to eight months?"

"No, it's for real. No choice in the matter anyway."

"You're handling this quite well."

The former Ranger waved "Not really. I'm just hiding it real good."

"Sure, you are," Hayley mused, unconvinced.

"No, really," he teased, "Later tonight, I'll break down and cry, smoke a couple joints, and maybe rent some of the hardcore stuff."

"Sure, Oliver," Hayley mused, "Whatever."

"You're invited, of course."

"Enough!" Hayley shot out and both broke into laughter. When both calmed down, Hayley asked, "So now what?"

"Now?" Tommy chuckled, looking at the wreckage of his lab. "Now I clean this mess up."

-o-

Meanwhile, in another realm of endless void... another man named Thomas Oliver contemplates his fate in limbo. He contemplates what to do now that his path to the afterlife is averted, despite the lie he told his double. He contemplates what his fate will be. But just as things seemed bleak, a light dawns upon him and grabs him with an invisible hold. He does nothing, says nothing, and feels nothing. He just lets the light take him. He watches as the light envelops him and blinds him until he finds himself free and in another place.
No longer stuck in limbo, he finds himself in an endless dune of sand. It's relatively quiet here, save for the slight sound of gales in the distance. He doesn't feel any more alive than before, but doesn't feel lost. He knows he is on Earth, but doesn't know which Earth. Is he at home or is he somewhere else?
So many questions float in his mind and the only way to find out is venturing out there.

He'll find his answers somewhere. Of that, there's no question.

Whether he'll like what he finds? Well...

That's another story in itself.

THE END...?

698 - Fanfiction Repost: DinoThunder - The Will To Live - PART 7

2012-02-14T18:20:00.000-05:00

Disclaimer: The author would like to clarify that Power Rangers and its characters is owned by Saban Brands and not the author.

Doctor Thomas Oliver has a decision to make. A decision that will either be the end of his Ranger career or will delay the inevitable succumbing of the imbalances that have built up over the years. It's only been five days since his re-awakening, but what he has heard is almost plentiful enough.

Three days ago.

Tommy sat on the couch in the living room of his home, with William Cranston leaning on the side of a wall. It was rather quiet in Tommy's house... in fact, it had been rather peaceful all week at Reefside. Hayley had already told the other Dino Rangers of his recovery and asked to give him a few days alone before meeting with him. Justin had returned to home to continue his studies, leaving the two veterans alone to discuss past activities, memories, and other subjects of interest. Eventually, Tommy thought it was time to bring up the 'problem' Billy mentioned earlier... the one he was purposely trying to avoid all day.

Finally, Tommy blurted out the question. "So what caused my death?"

Billy sighed and sat on a chair. "Your constant exposure to differing Ranger powers over the years is the primary cause of your... 'death' as you refer to it."

Tommy looked away briefly before facing his friend again. "What do you mean by that? I mean, Hayley told me pretty much what you told her, but I'd like to know a little more about what's going on."

Billy grimaced. "Well, during the time I've been here, I've been able to analyze your vitals a little more carefully as well as the properties of the Dino Gem itself. I'll tell you the same thing I told Hayley a couple days earlier; each time you switched powers, your body chemistry experiences a slight imbalance. Nothing particularly fatal in its initial stages, but over time and many power changes, these imbalances would eventually cause you to suffer symptoms."

"Like my coma?" Tommy interjected.

"Affirmative," Billy said, "Now when you assumed the powers of the Black Dino Gem and the Black Ranger, somehow those powers caused a much-more inhibiting imbalance in your life force. To an extent, that's what caused your coma in the first place. Hayley told me some of the circumstances preceding this and it's possible that these occurrences might have added to those imbalances in your chemistry. Unfortunately, it's not sufficient cause to putting you to temporary death, so I studied your vitals with a bit more detail and discovered that a trace of the Gamma-Tri disease had been the cause."

"I don't understand."

"You remember Ethan Kain?"

Tommy thought hard until his thoughts came across an incident several years ago, when the original Rangers had encountered Kain, an aged scientist claiming to be one of Rita Repulsa's chosen disciples. It was during the early period of his stint as the White Ranger and newly-appointed leader. "The guy who used some purple gas to knock you guys out? I remember him, but why are you bring that up?"

Billy nodded. "You remember the prognosis Alpha made on you?"

Tommy thought back to the encounter and the circumstances surrounding it. "If I remember right, you guys were affected because some Gamma-Tri traces were flowing in your bloodstream," Tommy replied, "Jason has never made contact with any Gamma-Tri substance, so he isn't susceptible to the plague. As far as I was concerned, Alpha thought it possible that when the Green Candle burned out and I lost my Green Ranger powers the first time, the Gamma Tri particles may have been eliminated." As he said those words, a thought popped into his mind. "Could Alpha had been wrong?"

"I'd say it's possible that your exposure to Gamma Tri was different than the rest of us," theorized Billy, "That's why Alpha didn't catch it at the time, but I can't find any other possible explanation for your condition."

"My condition," Tommy repeated, somewhat confused. "I thought you said I was fine."

The original Blue Ranger raised an eyebrow. "I never said that, Tommy."

"So what are you saying?"

Billy sighed. "Right now, I'm currently studying alternative means of either curing or inhibiting this imbalance in your life. But until we do, I have to suggest that you restrain yourself from morphing into battle."

Tommy hung his head and stood up. "I can't do that, Bill. Mesogog isn't likely to stay quiet for long and I have to be there for my Rangers."

"I'd have to insist that you hold back," Billy said, "Your morphing is only adding to your condition and quite frankly, it's very likely that another incident like this can happen and the next time we won't be as lucky. And if your Rangers need any help, I'm sure Justin or anybody else can fill in while we have the DNA coder disabled." He walked over to Tommy and laid a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Tommy, I'm telling you this as your friend and as someone who had fought beside you and against you in the Ranger ranks. At your current state, a couple morphs will terminate your existence. And there isn't anything we can do to bring you back to life again."

Tommy slumped into his chair, thinking about his current condition. Much as he wants to dispute it, he had to admit Billy was right. Still, he wasn't thrilled about the idea.

"How long am I on morphing probation?"

"I don't know." Billy said, rubbing his chin. "A week at most."

Tommy nodded, satisfied with the answer for now. "Okay, Bill. Take the time you need."

-o-

Yesterday.

And so Billy went to work on developing a cure or at least some sort of countermeasure and in the meantime, Tommy was on morphing probation. During that period of time, Mesogog sent another monster to bring trouble to Reefside, but fortunately, the Rangers were able to defeat it easily thanks to Conner's Triassic Ranger powers. While he was glad that his Rangers won, he was admittedly disappointed that he wasn't part of the action. But he did give Billy a week to come up and during this time, he'll stay on the side lines. As it turned out, all the time Billy needed was three days of constant work and came by earlier in the morning to meet with Tommy...

"After some deliberation, I've managed to produce two formulas which will counteract the affects of your condition," Billy said, motioning to the two vials of light-blue liquid on the table. One of them had a slightly pinkish tint. "Both of these vials have different properties, but I've ran a few simulations and they should work without much difficulty."

Tommy looked at the two vials curiously and turned back to his friend. "What's the difference?"

The original Blue Ranger cleared his throat. "I'm not going to lie to you. Regardless of which you take, neither has aftereffects you'll like." He pointed to one of the vials. "This pinkish substance is merely a temporary fix; while it won't completely repair the life force imbalance, it will allow you to morph without any fatal consequences. Its main detriment is that it's impossible to determine how long it'll last. Could be anywhere between a few months or a few weeks."

Tommy nodded. "And what about the other one?"

Billy looked at the other vial. "The other one's a more permanent solution. It'll most definitely repair the life force imbalance without question, but doing so will purge any morphigenic compounds and other Ranger-related substances from your bloodstream."

"In other words, I can't morph into the Black Ranger," Tommy realized, "The Dino Gem won't bond with my DNA anymore."

Billy shook his head before Tommy could say anymore. "In other words, you can't morph. Period."

Tommy was almost at a loss of words. "No Dino Gems? No Zeonisers?"

"Nothing," Billy replied, almost sounding sad. "Even any new morphers you haven't touched will reject you."

Tommy was almost at a loss of words, but in all honesty, he wasn't surprised by this. Somehow, he had expected this, since his constant changing of powers, combined with the lingering affects of the Gamma-Tri compound from years earlier, were the indirect cause of his current state.

"In a way, it's akin to a sports star who suffers a career-ending injury that would prevent him from partaking in the sport in a physical way," the Black Ranger reasoned, "Difference is I have a choice between early retirement and delaying the inevitable, but it's not an easy one."

"I know that," Billy said, "That's why I'm giving you the choice. You can take the pink formula and retain your morphing powers, but you'll eventually have to take the other one if you want to live."

Tommy thought for a moment before replying. "I'll have to think about it."

-o-

Today.

The day went by smoothly for Tommy. Billy had to return to Mariner Bay to take care of some business he had with Lightspeed Rescue's investors while Justin had been long gone. Things slowly returned to normal for Tommy... well, as normal as his life would be. The decision had to be made about the vials, but Tommy was content with putting it aside and just living out life: teaching class, grading papers, and working out in after hours.

When Tommy fell asleep later that night, he had a dream. This dream was different from the others; it was an emptiness similar to what he had experienced, but the emptiness seemed almost too real. When Tommy found himself here, he also found himself face to face with the so-called "alternate universe" version of himself, the bearded man who had been confrontational with him during his tenure in limbo. Thomas Oliver smiled a wicked smile, which made Tommy cringe.

"You know this would happen, didn't you?" the bearded Thomas asked. "Somehow, you knew about this."

Tommy shrugged. "I had a feeling, but it had to happen."

"That's right, Doctor Oliver. It had to happen," Thomas said, his voice almost matching that of Tommy's. "But truthfully, I'm glad it happened to you. Because I don't believe I would have been as calm."

Tommy couldn't help but grin. "I believe that. So what happens to you now?"

"You beat my ass and left me for dead in limbo," Thomas chirped, "But I've gone to the afterlife, to a better place than most are willing to admit. Just as well, I don't think I want to return to my life of violence."

"Circle of violence has to end sometime," Tommy said, "Maybe this was the sign."

Thomas nodded in agreement. "Anyway, I'm just here to apologize and to wish you luck. Whatever decision you make, I hope you live your life well."

Tommy accepted the peace offering and gripped his counterpart's hand. "Thanks, man."

And with that, he woke up. Immediately, he turned on his lamp and checked his clock. It was still late at night, but despite the time, he no longer had a desire to sleep, because Doctor Thomas Oliver has a decision to make. A decision that will either be the end of his Ranger career or will delay the inevitable succumbing of the imbalances that have built up over the years. It's only been five days since his re-awakening, but what he has heard from Billy and from his dream is almost plentiful enough.

Slipping on a black robe, he made the walk out of his bedroom and into his living room, where the two vials were sitting on the glass table. Before making the return trip to Mariner Bay, Billy left them there for Tommy to take whenever he wanted to, but wished to be informed of his decision. Tommy approached the table, dropped onto his couch, and stared at the two vials and contemplated his decision. The pink vial would allow him to morph without consequence, but after an undetermined period of time, its affects will wear off and Tommy will be back to the state that he's in. The other vial contains a more permanent solution, which will not only purge the chemical imbalance causing his condition, but also the properties in his life force that allows him to morph, thus preventing him from being a Ranger ever again.

It was a difficult decision to make and Tommy stayed up long and hard to come to the decision he eventually made after late hours of thinking. But first, he picked up the phone and made the call to Billy's Mariner Bay home. It took a few rings to get through, but eventually he got connected.

"Hello?" Billy's groggy voice replied.

"It's me, Bill. Sorry to wake you, but I've made up my mind..."

TO BE CONCLUDED...

697 - Fanfiction Repost: DinoThunder - The Will To Live - PART 6

2012-02-14T18:17:00.000-05:00

Disclaimer: The author would like to clarify that Power Rangers and its characters is owned by Saban Brands and not the author.

In the city of Reefside, a veteran Ranger's life hangs in the balance. Despite the help of a former Ranger and acquaintance, the fate of Thomas Oliver remains in doubt. Certain measures had to be taken.

Meanwhile, in the city of Mariner Bay, another former Ranger is resting comfortably in his nice warm bed in his small house. He was so glad that he was finally able to settle down in the morning after dealing with bureaucrats and stock holders for two hours straight that had interrupted his much needed sleep early in the morning. It wasn't something he had regretted after leaving Aquitar and getting involved with various Ranger-related projects, but William Cranston often wished that all these duties and opportunities caused a strain on his own personal life... which he had little time for these days.

Some time later, Billy got out of bed and let out a relieving yawn. Putting on a nearby robe, he was walking his way towards the bathroom when the telephone rung. Billy hung his head in frustration, anticipating another phone call from the parties whom had awoken him earlier.

"Hello?"

"Yeah, it's me. Listen, I need your help."

Billy rolled his eyes, partly surprised by the other veteran Ranger calling through his number and partly frustrated by his lack of proper etiquette. "I'm doing fine, Justin. Thanks."

"Excuse me?" the Ranger asked, confused.

"I've just had a good breakfast, had an excruciatingly dull conversation with Lightspeed's investors, and was on my way to a shower." Billy yawned before continuing. "You know, a little courtesy is all I'm asking."

"Sorry about that," Justin replied, "but I really need your help."

"With what?"

"It's Tommy. He's unconscious."

Billy suddenly became more aware at the mention of his friend and fellow Ranger, although he had suppress a grin. "He seems to be enjoying that position a lot as of late."

"Doctor Payne had reported him dead, but I believe otherwise," Justin stated matter-of-factly. "I found something that could be causing this, but I need your help."

"Where're you at?"

"Reefside. He moved there months ago. I know it's a long way from Mariner Bay, but I really need your help with this and so does Tommy."

Billy looked at his watch and mumbled to himself before speaking into the receiver. "If I find my old communicator, I'll be there in a few minutes. If not... well, make it an hour's drive."

Before Justin Stewart could reply, Billy hung up and walked to the bathroom.

-o-

Meanwhile in limbo, the two Thomas Olivers continued their search for a means of escape in the endless reality. Their search had eventually stumbled upon a small pebble similar to the one they encountered before. Further observation from Tommy confirmed that this was the stone they encountered before and now they were standing around the stone, looking at it intently. Thomas didn't know what to make of this, but he decided not to push the subject. Both were silent as they watched the stone shift colors from white to green and back again. After several minutes of staring into the stone, Thomas finally broke the silence.

"Any source of inspiration coming from the rainbow stone?"

"Pick up the stone," Tommy blurted out.

"Come again?"

"Pick up the stone," Tommy said again, "Maybe it'll open because you didn't touch it."

"But we share the same fingerprints," Thomas argued, "It'll never work."

Tommy looked at him, slightly annoyed. "You wanted an idea, didn't you?"

Thomas sighed. Feeling there was no other option, he gently picked up the stone and studied it for a moment. Just as before, it was a smooth-surfaced pebble that gradually grew hotter. Eventually, Thomas dropped the stone, watching it shatter when it hit the ground. Just as before, a cascade of energy was released, eventually forming a doorway as it did before. Unlike the previous doorway, there was no peeks into other realms. Instead it was a comforting blue hue of energy with no shift in colors or shades.

"The portal's back," Tommy said as he observed the doorway more carefully. "Looks more stable this time."

"I'll take your word for it." replied Thomas, who gazed at the flowing portal briefly, digesting its hauntingly beautiful form. He then turned to his double and shot a devilish grin. "Well, it's been fun, but I've got to run."

"Wait a minute," Tommy said, holding his counterpart by the arm as he was about to step through. "I thought we were going to try and escape together."

"Change of plans," Thomas shot, "Besides, I thought you knew how critical things were on my world!"

"Which doesn't make it any reason for you to be this way!" Tommy retorted. "According to the divine powers that brought us here, you were meant to die."

Thomas withheld a snort. "I don't know if you forgotten, but so were you. But if you insist on keeping me from helping my friends, then I have no choice but to take you down."

Tommy sighed as he saw his bearded counterpart fall into a defensive stance. "We shouldn't have to do this."

"Yes we do," insisted Thomas, his calm voice betraying his stone face. "Whoever wins the fight gets to leave this place and return to the living and the loser stays. Let's just skip the honorable hand-to-hand stuff and get to the hardcore action."

With a quick motion of his fists, Thomas produced two wrist devices and quickly joined them together in another quick motion. Red light soon enveloped the man, forcing Tommy to block his eyes from the blinding light. When the light faded, Tommy lowered his arms to find that his counterpart had been replaced with that of a Red Ranger. But what surprised Tommy somewhat was that this Ranger form was none of his previous forms, but a form vaguely similar to that of the original Red Ranger. The suit design, helmet, and color schemes were the same, but in place of the simplistic white gloves were silver gauntlets embedded with ruby gemstones. The boots had a heavier, metallic look to it. Hanging over the Ranger suit was the golden chestplate of the Green Ranger, completing the overall look.

"Like my new form?" the Red Ranger asked, a hint of arrogance trailing his words. "It's the product of Eltarian technology combined with Orion mystics. If you know what's good for you, you'll let me pass."

Tommy shook his head in disbelief. "Come on, power down and let's figure out a way out together. Stop this selfish ambition."

Beneath the mask, Thomas sneered. "Not a chance! Prepare to go to Hell!"

Realizing that reasoning was out of the question, Tommy begrudgingly summoned his own morpher and activated it. His form was soon replaced with that of his current Black Ranger guise. As he summoned his trademark Bracciostaff, his counterpart had summoned his own trademark weapon: a long, battered broadsword whose wide double-edged blade emitted a slight reddish glow.

"You know you have no chance," the Red Ranger said, "These new Ranger powers outclass all others."
Tommy shook his head, gripping his weapon tightly. "If your powers were any good, you wouldn't be here right now."

Without warning, the Red Ranger launched himself into the air with the sword held over his hand. As he was about to land, he swung the sword forward towards Tommy, who managed to sidestep the attack. When the Red Ranger landed, he was struck with a kick to the chest which stunned him momentarily. Tommy swung the staff to his opponent, but he was too slow as the Red Ranger recovered and blocked the blow with his sword. A quick elbow strike to Tommy's head forced him to drop the staff, but upon seeing the Ranger swinging the sword, he blocked it with his hands and kicked it away. The two Tommies, now unarmed, frantically traded off punches and kicks, lunges and foot sweeps, and other maneuvers quick. Just as the melee peaked in intensity, a great force knocked the two away from each other.

Tommy recovered quickly while his counterpart was slow to regain his bearings. Seeing this as an open opportunity, Tommy motioned the blade of his Bracciostaff in a circular motion and shot out an energy orb attack, which had taken down or crippled many enemies in the past. By the time the Red Ranger saw the orb flying at him, it was too late to do anything. The blast had enveloped his entire body and a series of explosions ripped his armor apart. When the smoke cleared, Tommy got a clear view of the other Thomas Oliver, who was breathing heavily as he experienced a forceful demorph that returned him to his real form.

With a quick motion, the Black Ranger demorphed and was replaced with his civilian identity. Tommy looked down at his fallen counterpart with pity. He began to walk towards the portal when Thomas cried out. "Come back here! Don't leave me like this!"

Tommy turned to face his opponent, suppressing a smile. "Suddenly, I'm beginning to doubt if you're really me or just another test to keep me from being awake."

With that, Tommy stepped into the portal and...

-o-

"How long was he like this?" Billy asked as he studied Tommy's vitals.

"About a couple days," Hayley replied while Justin checked on Tommy's immobile body. "Your friend seemed to handle things rather well."

"Justin was a bright kid when he was a Ranger," Billy noted, recalling their brief partnership together in the launching of a pivotal project during the height of the Alliance War. "Those skills he developed in college came in handy."

Both Hayley and Billy studied the vitals for a few seconds before they started to change on him. Billy shot a brief smile at the readings before it was replaced with a concerned frown.

"What's going on?" Hayley asked.

Billy scratched his head. "Whatever is causing his current comatose state is being eradicated. His vitals are returning to normal."

"So that's good, right?" she asked, confused by Billy's heavy tone. "So why the long face?"

Billy studied the vitals a second time, more thoroughly, searching for any possible error or anything he might have overlooked. When he found nothing, his fears were confirmed and with a heavy heart, he turned to Hayley , who was looking back at the Blue Ranger with quizzical expressions.

"His vitals are returning to normal, but along with it comes an additional side-effect that I've been fearing for a long time," he explained, trying to keep his voice calm.

"I don't get it."

Billy sighed. "You know that Tommy had been exposed to multiple Ranger powers over the past few years. Well, each time he switches powers, it causes a slight imbalance in his body chemistry. Because of Tommy's constant exposure to alternating Ranger powers, these imbalances would have occurred in greater frequency and would build up to the point where he'd eventually be getting symptoms." He turned to Hayley. "You mentioned before that Tommy fell into a similar coma a few days prior to his announced death, correct?"

Hayley nodded. "The first time was just a coma after he was encased in amber, stuck in a morphed state, and was temporarily invisible... Could these be possible symptoms of these constant imbalances you're talking about?"

"The amber was an attack, so that I doubt," answered Billy, "but there's no reason for being stuck in morphed state. The built-in failsafe wouldn't have allowed it."

Hayley raised an eyebrow. "There's failsafes in morphers?"

Billy thought about it briefly before ignoring that last comment. "In any case, these comas are possible symptoms, but I won't know until I examine the data further but..."

"Hey guys! I think he's coming too!"

-o-

As soon as Tommy stepped through the portal, he was immediately hit by pitch darkness and knocked out. Probably for the best, since what he would experience for the next hour would be pretty graphic and would make him wish he was dead. When he did eventually regained consciousness, the first thing he saw was Justin Stewart's grinning face hovering over him.

"Hey guys!" the former Blue Turbo Ranger cried out, "I think he's coming too!"

Tommy winced for a moment at the young man's loud bellow. "Not too loud, Justin. I just woke up."

He whisked Justin away with his hand and saw Hayley standing there, trying to fight back tears. She then leaned over and kissed him on the forehead, then whispered, "Welcome back and don't expect me to wear pink for you."

Tommy shook his head in disbelief, but when his eyes met with those of a longtime friend he hadn't seen in years, his eyes widened and so did his smile.

"You bastard," he quipped, "What are you doing here saving my butt again?"

Billy half-smiled. "Making sure you were well enough to ask a question like that."

Tommy couldn't help but chuckle, but quickly frowned when he noticed that the three friends' enthusiasm were less than he had hoped for. "Is it just me or were you guys hoping I didn't come back from the dead?"

Although Hayley and Justin simply turned away in response, Billy winced at the words. "Now that you mention it, Tom, we do have a problem to discuss..."

TO BE CONTINUED...

696 - Fanfiction Repost: DinoThunder - The Will To Live - PART 5

2012-02-14T18:10:00.005-05:00

Disclaimer: The author would like to clarify that Power Rangers and its characters is owned by Saban Brands and not the author.

The initial tests performed within the past hour had revealed very little results, much to the chagrin of the Black Ranger. While Tommy's vitals were stable, they were still dangerously low. Most of the techniques he had learned from the self-help guide had little effect on Tommy's prone state. The Black Ranger cursed silently as he stared at the unconscious veteran Ranger who had been his longtime friend and partner. With a few keystrokes on the nearby console, he had begun another series of tests, each one more intensive than the last. Much to his disappointment, none of the tests had come up negative.

He had a problem, for he had exhausted all pre-programmed test options in the computer system's memory banks. He had thought of one possible scanning method he had witnessed years ago in his prime years. It was a scanning method that was only used a couple times when conventional scanning methods proved to be dead ends. Determined to try anything, the Black Ranger approached the keyboard and brought up a new command prompt. After a moment of recollection, he began typing frantically. From the other side of the clear barrier that divided the containment chamber from the rest of the room, Hayley had noticed the Ranger's typing away.

"Something wrong?"

"No, just something I'd like to try out," the Ranger replied simply, "If it's alright with you, I'd like to save this into the computer memory banks. In case you might need it again."

Hayley simply nodded. "No problem."

-o-

Some time had passed since the portal to the realm of living was closed off. Tommy couldn't remember how long it had been, though. He was focusing on looking for another way out... as well as mentally blocking off the incessive ramblings of his parallel counterpart, who had been on his back complaining about how he had let. He had tried to argue his point, but knew that this Thomas Oliver was even more dense that he was. Giving up his futile attempts, he continued to find a means of escape. Unfortunately, no other portal or gateway was found. As each minute passed, Tommy's resolve began to fickle as he wondered if he... if they would ever be able to get out of here.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, the two Tommies gave up and took a brief break. It was clear to both of them that whoever was running things did not want them to leave until the time was right, if at all. So they got together and sat on the fog-covered floor, each one thinking individual thoughts. For a long time, neither one said a word to each other. In Tommy's mind, perhaps he'd preferred it this way.

"So what's your world like?" Tommy asked.

Thomas looked at him funny. "The same as yours, of course. Only different."

"Care to explain a bit?" Tommy's voice was more demanding. "I mean, we need to know each other a little better if we're going to get out of here?"

Thomas sighed, knowing what the doctor said was true. "After the Alliance war ended, I had committed myself to studying alien activity on Earth. I've pretty much shut myself off from society in order to prepare for any massive scale assaults. With the assistance of Andros, I was able to build a personal command chamber underneath my Arizona home and develop a database pertaining to all Ranger teams. This took me a few years to do.

"A couple years ago, Andros had learned that a renegade group of Machine Empire generals were digging out the remains of Lord Zedd's personal zord, Serpenterra. Knowing the power of that zord first hand, I had assembled a team of Red Rangers to prevent Serpenterra from being risen from the grave. The battle was fierce, but in the end, we emerged victorious and Serpenterra, along with the Machine generals, were destroyed."

"That happened in my world too," Tommy said, "Things would have gotten worse if it wasn't for Cole."

Thomas nodded. "Right. And we thought it was the end of it, but of course, we thought wrong. While we were fighting off Venjix, the real Machine Empire under the command of Emperor Aradon had waged war against the Varox Confederacy which resulted in the Varox homeworld being obliterated and the species almost completely decimated. Only a few Varox survived the encounter and they proved to be the most dangerous of the bunch.

"Several months later, a couple of Varox renegades had invaded Earth. One of them had attacked the city of Mariner Bay and was quickly defeated by the Lightspeed Ranger team. Unfortunately, the Varox had activated some sort of detonator that killed the Ranger team and devastated half the city." Thomas paused for a moment and noticed Tommy's jaw slightly dropping. "This didn't happen in your world, did it?"

Tommy shook his head as he regained his bearings. "Other than a few released demons, time-lost villains, and a fight with an evil tyrant, things have been relatively peaceful on my world." He caught Thomas rolling his eyes and sighed. "Sorry about that. So what happened after?"

"The other Varox was still on the loose and had gotten his hands on an experimental device that was supposedly able to send a detonation signal to just about every mass destructive bomb on the planet and send everything to hell. It took a lot of Rangers and resources to prevent Armageddon from happening, but we managed it." Thomas let out a breath before he continued. "So time passed and I had decided to attend a local banquet. Forgot what it was for, but it seemed important enough for me to show up. Around this time, a fight broke out and I got involved. I was actually doing pretty good, considering I couldn't use my powers. But overconfidence was my biggest mistake and someone took advantage by stabbing me in the back." He chuckled at that last thought. "It seemed almost funny now that I think about. All those adventures, all those life-threatening situations, and I go out by getting stabbed in the back."

Tommy placed a hand over his counterpart's shoulder. "It happens, man."

"Right," Thomas humored, "But from there, things got a lot worse. I have this nagging feeling that it was part of a bigger deal. That's why I have to get out of here. If I could be of any help..."

Tommy placed a hand over his counterpart's shoulder. "We'll get out of this, man. Together."

And for the first time, the bearded Thomas Oliver shot a smile. "Right. Let's find a way out of here."

With that done, Tommy got up and began walking away. Thomas stood there and watched as his counterpart moved further away. His friendly smile was soon replaced with a concerned frown and quickly followed by a devilish grin, his eyes staring a hole down the neck of Tommy.

"We'll find a way out together, Doctor Oliver," he whispered to himself as he began to follow Tommy. "But I guarantee you that we won't be leaving together.

-o-

It took a while to get the programming done, but eventually the computers had managed to process the new commands required to commence the makeshift scan that the Black Ranger had devised. With the more difficult part done, he focused on monitoring Tommy's vitals while the scanners did the rest. As he had expected, the new scan had produced some results and the Black Ranger checked the readouts. After a few minutes of scanning, he let out a agitated sigh and slammed both fists against the console.

"Crap," he cursed.

"What is it?" Hayley's voice boomed over the comm system. "Did you find something?"

The Black Ranger sighed. "Good news. I've found a way to bringing Tommy back to life."

Hayley almost smiled when she noticed the Ranger's lack of enthusiasm in his words. "That's a good thing, right?"

"Well, that's the bad news," he added, "It's completely out of our hands."

Hayley slumped back on her chair. "You're kidding."

"I wish," the Ranger said as he stepped into the small decontamination chamber that served as the entryway between the containment chamber and the rest of the room. Pressing a blinking light had caused the chamber to shower him with bright energy which removed the thing layer of radiation that had stuck onto the suit. After a few seconds, he stepped out of the chamber and quickly powered down, revealing a slender blonde-haired man of medium-build wearing a navy turtleneck and black pants.

"Apparently this is similar to his previous coma," he said, "but there are a couple of other factors that are inhibiting his recovery. One of which is an unforeseen element that has a dimensional ID different from Tommy's."

Hayley blinked a few times, trying to take in all the Ranger had said. "Dimensional ID? You mean whatever has Tommy like this is from another dimension."

The Ranger shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know what I mean. I've never seen anything like this before. What I do know is that we can't do anything to counter the effects. Like I had said, it's completely out of our hands."

Hayley stifled a frustrated sigh. This isn't what she wanted to hear, but there wasn't any other way of getting another opinion. "Any other ideas?"

The Ranger thought for a moment before replying. "There's one other thing I might be thinking about, but it's a long shot."

"Anything's better than nothing at this point," said Hayley, her eyes affixed on the unconscious Tommy. "I doubt he can hold up."

"You're right," he confirmed, "It's worth a shot. Mind if I use your phone?"

Hayley pointed to the small handheld phone that was laying atop a stack of papers. The Ranger quickly picked it up and dial a number he hadn't used in a long time. He worried when there was no answer and was just about to answer when he had heard a very faint "Hello" from the other line, at which point he let off a quick sigh of relief.

"Yeah, it's me," he said, "Listen, I need your help."

TO BE CONTINUED...

695 - Fanfiction Repost: DinoThunder - The Will To Live - PART 4

2012-02-14T18:09:00.002-05:00

Still left this hanging, huh? Let's fix that, shall we? I think we've had a long enough moment of silence.

Disclaimer: The author would like to clarify that Power Rangers and its characters is owned by Saban Brands and not the author.

Black. The darkest color of the spectrum in which no light is visible.

Black. A vague description in a negative tonality as something dangerous.

Black. Complete darkness.

This is all that Thomas Oliver sees when he opens his eyes. The pain was gone. The weight of dry blood was also gone. He felt nothing but a cold surface under his feet. Tommy moves his left arm around and feels nothing. He pinches himself and feels nothing. He simply stands in darkness, letting the fact sink in to him, shedding away any doubt that had clouded his mind a few short minutes ago.

He's dead.

No tricks. No illusions. No spells. None of that.

He had expected to be in a cloudy place or in a realm of bright light. He had also considered the possibility of being sent to Hell and had expected to be surrounded by little imps with pitchforks dancing on flames. Instead, he found himself in this black void... a void he couldn't possibly identify. Tommy didn't really want to know about that. All he wanted to know was... what now?

In the distance, Tommy could see a small door of light appear. With no other option, he walks towards the door until he is a few steps away. He looks at the door and from it emerged another figure who looked like Tommy, with the exception of a few glaring differences. This particular figure wore a standard black tuxedo with white shirt and shiny black shoes. His hair was about an inch longer than what he had, and he had a full beard as opposed to Tommy's pinch. Both men stared at each other for a long time before the bearded man broke the silence.

"Welcome to the afterlife, Doctor Oliver," he said, then let out a shallow chuckle. "Man, I can't believe I just said that. I never would have saw that coming."

Tommy raised an eyebrow. "Who are you? And where am I?"

The man smiled. "You're currently in limbo, the realm between heaven and hell. This is where you still have some chance of survival. As for who I am, I'm you."

Tommy stood there wide-eyed. "You're kidding?"

"Actually, not you-you. But rather you in a different way." The other Oliver let out an exaggerated breath. "Let's call it alternate realities to keep things simpler."

"Good enough for me... Tommy?"

"Don't call me that," he said harshly, "I prefer Thomas."

Tommy scoffed. "Fine then... Thomas. So you mind explaining to me how you got here?"

Thomas smiled. "I died obviously, though through a different means than your own. I got stabbed in the back while attending a banquet that had turned into a bloody brawl."

"You? Stabbed in the back?"

"Incredible, isn't it?" Thomas shot with a dry grin. "Since then, I've been scrimmaging around here looking any way to get out of here and help my friends, but for several days, I've been unable to find a means of escape." He paused and took a long hard look at Tommy, who eyed him suspiciously. "Doctor Oliver?"

Tommy nodded. "A doctor of paleontology, actually."

Thomas groaned, almost in disbelief. "Even better. How about we find a means of escape together?"

"If one exists. We're dead, remember?"

"We're in limbo," Thomas added with a smile. "We're not dead yet."

-o-

Hayley sat at the computer console, inputting several key commands. When she was done, a loading screen appeared and she turned to see the makeshift containment chamber, where the unconscious Tommy laid on a bed with electrodes attached all over his body. She then glanced at the busy Black Ranger - normally a guise assumed by Tommy, but thanks to some modifications on Tommy's morpher to override the DNA decoders, was now occupied by a longtime friend who had arrived on short notice to try and save Tommy. When he had revealed his plan to Hayley through the telephone, she thought it was a risky venture, but considering that he had been in a similar situation before - and given his own credentials as a Ranger - she had no problem trusting him and going along with it.

Within the containment chamber, the Black Ranger tapped on a comm system. "Hayley, my side's ready to go. Are you all set?"

"Not like we have a choice or anything," she replied and turned to the console. She saw the monitor display Tommy's life readings, which were low but steady - definitely an improvement in any case. "Everything's set on my end. You sure you know what you're doing?"

The Black Ranger couldn't help but laugh. "Not like we have a choice or anything. Let's get started."

-o-

For several hours, two Thomas Olivers from different parallel realities were stuck in limbo, searching for a means of escape to no avail so far. Although Tommy was frustrated that he hadn't found a way out of limbo - whether it be to the realm of the living or not was irrelevant at this point - he did have conversations with the counterpart Thomas Oliver from the other dimension concerning personal matters. While he has his doubts that he is who and what he claims to be, he was amazed by how similar and different both their lives were in comparison.

Both of them had a personal command chamber under their homes, both of them had been considered legends among their respective Rangers, and both of them had suffered similar personal losses. But while Tommy had chosen to continue his lifestyle and eventually get a job as a high school teacher, the other Thomas Oliver had dedicated his whole life to the war against evil, abolishing his normal life in favor of anonymous status to look over various Ranger teams and commanding them from his personal command center that he had built underground in a land. Tommy noticed that there was a hint of disdain coming from Thomas whenever he spoke, but at the same time he couldn't help but wondered if he would turned out that way had he not decided to return to university and finish off his classes.

As Tommy was stray in his thoughts, he had tripped over a pebble laying on the ground but had managed to recover quickly. Eyeing the curious stone, he picked up and studied it for a moment. It was a simple, smooth-surfaced pebble about the size of his palm, but its touch was rather warm. As it got hotter, Tommy reluctantly dropped the stone. When it hit the ground, the stone shattered and from it released a cascade of energy which formed into a doorway. Through this doorway, Tommy looked on and saw Dino Base, where he saw Hayley and an old friend working over Tommy's body. The image just as quickly shifted to that of a darkened room with a body draped over it. From some of the tubes and equipment, Tommy assumed the room to be some kind of morgue, but he had never seen a morgue with this much technology. It came to mind that this might be the other Thomas Oliver's home dimension.

Tommy turned to Thomas, who was about a few feet away from him. "I found something of interest."

"What is it?" the bearded man asked as he approached his counterpart.

Tommy eyed the doorway as it shifted between the Dino Base and the dark morgue. "Looks like an Invisi-Portal."

"Invisi-what?"

"Invisible portals," Tommy cleared up, "Doorways that often transport from one spot to another. But they're usually invisible when inactive."

Thomas eyed the phenomenon closely, noticing several particles of energy leaking from it. Tommy just as quickly noticed it too, as all well as the fact that the doorway was slowly shrinking. Tommy assumed that it might take a couple hours as best, but his counterpart seemed much more pessimistic.

"Looks like this one's unstable," Thomas said finally, "Chances are only one of us can get through."

Tommy stared as the shrinking portal before he replied. "You're probably right. Hayley might have more experience with this, though." He turned to the bearded Thomas. "Any ideas on how we should proceed?"

Thomas thought for a moment. "Yeah, I've got one. I'll go and you stay."

Tommy looked at him incredulously. "What kind of idea is that?"

"My world needs me more than yours does."

Tommy winced. "Based on what?"

Thomas shot him a icy glare, ignoring the buckling of the doorway. "My world is on the verge of destruction while yours is threatened by a mutant dinosaur."

"Who is also capable of mass destruction," Tommy interrupted, "We've both got our reasons for going back. You just can't assume that yours is more important!"

As the two continued to bicker, the doorway suddenly turned a pale white and the light began to intensify. When the increasing brightness caught the attention of the two Rangers, they turned in time to see the portal collapse completely without a trace. Tommy looked down to find the pebble that had vaporized previous returned to normal. When he reached for it, a bolt of lightning shot from the stone and shocked his hand, causing Tommy to step back. Behind him, Thomas let out a strained chuckle.

"Great job, Doctor," he snorted, "We're stuck here now."

Tommy angrily pushed away his counterpart. "You wanted to leave me behind."

"It doesn't matter now," Thomas said, "We're stuck here. Possibly forever."

TO BE CONTINUED...

694 - Not Even Shawn Michaels Could Make Me Care About Taker/HHH III

2012-02-14T16:50:00.004-05:00

Last night's RAW was in that zone that teetered between boring and depressing. If this was the show that they were hoping to entice potential customers to purchase their upcoming pay-per-view this Sunday, then I can't say it's been effective.

- The opening debate among the various participants in the ultimately worthless Elimination Chamber match; strangely enough, a concept that could have been depressing was probably the show's best segment. Sure, it felt a bit slow at times, but all six superstars got to say their piece and CM Punk got a nice dig on Jericho regarding Dancing With The Stars. Was it enough to sell the PPV in my eyes? Not really, but on the bright side, it gave people a chance to talk and it was something remotely different.

- What isn't remotely different is the seemingly never-ending stupidity between John Cena and Kane and their seemingly endless attempts to "push" Zack Ryder by making him looking completely and utterly stupid, regardless of whether that was their intent. If this is suppose to make us care about Cena or Ryder, then it isn't fucking working. And if this is suppose to rally support for Cena in his upcoming match with Dwayne, then it's also not fucking working. Dwayne might not be around as much as anybody in WWE would like, but that's probably a good thing because that means he won't get stale and boring... which is exactly what John Cena or anybody else happens to be right now. Cena could actually benefit from a long absence and so would WWE, quite frankly.

- Also, Shawn Michaels shows up, goads HHH into accepting Taker's challenge, and HHH once again refusing... also, Taker cuts his hair... or cuts hair from the wig he's wearing... as enthralling as this might be, I have no desire to see another HHH/Taker match, especially since the last one was oh, so painful.

You'll note that I never bring up any of the matches that take place. The matches are inconsequential in the long run and in all honesty, I never gave a damn about what was going on. A dangerous mindset for any viewer to possess as it will tune them out. Overall, I thought the show was below meh.

693 - Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

2012-02-14T10:52:00.003-05:00

Never read the book, but I saw a trailer that they did for the book. That was kinda cool and I sorta thought it would have been good fodder for a movie. Lo and behold, leave it to Tim Burton to pull one out.

Need to get me mitts on the book.

692 - ENTERPRISE: These Aren't The Voyages (You're Looking For)

2012-02-14T01:30:00.000-05:00

Originally written in 2005/2006, but never formally posted until now... and for good reason...

So yeah, here's the "sequel" to These Were The Voyages, because I know one was desperately needed about as much as we need good ol' B&B in the Trek franchise... so yeah, here's the sequel... enjoy... please?

Disclaimer: Paramount owns Star Trek, not me.

Six months have passed since Enterprise (registry number NX-01) had returned to Earth due to the abrupt and unfortunate cancellation of their mission due to sagging interest ratings and the general disinterest of Starfleet, who have decided to shift their starship program in a different direction than normally intended. During those six months, however, Enterprise was only the first to be decommissioned callously, as Starfleet began recall nearly ninety percent of their warp-powered starships and cruisers. The remaining ten percent of the starships in active duty, crewed by inexperienced racists and overbearing valley girls.

In his home in San Francisco, former Captain Jonathan Archer was absolutely furious. As if hearing of the starship program's cancellation was bad enough, news of Enterprise having been merciless dismantled and used for spare parts on the local freight cruisers generally made him furious. There was seemingly nothing he could do to combat the destruction of everything he held dear and that his father had helped to build... until he came across an old film from 20th century Earth; specifically the 1990s. The culture of the era befuddled Archer, but the general idea involved lots of people beating each other up. Upon finishing the movie, an idea lit in Archer's mind.

"That's it! What a great idea I had!" cried Archer, pumping his fist in the air. "I'll challenge him to Mortal Kombat!"

Getting on his best vintage uniform from his navy days, Archer preceded out of his apartment doors and marched his way towards Starfleet Headquarters...

About halfway there, however, Archer stopped for a moment. "Maybe I should get some back-up... just in case..."

-o-

"Mooney here."

"Um, sir. There's a Captain Archer here to see you."

"Hmm?" Mooney commented, then smacked himself silly. "Oh yeah, the idiot whose ship I tossed into the scrap heap!" He paused for a short girly giggle in recognition of that day. "Yeah, send him in."

The doors open and in walked Captain Archer, decked out in uniform and holding a phase pistol two centuries ahead of his time... although he doesn't know that, but SHH! Don't tell him.

"So, Doctor Beckett," Mooney said, "We meet again at last."

Archer snorted. "It's Captain Archer now. And I have just about had it with your messing up of the Starfleet!"

Mooney' eyes briefly widened before he let out a girly giggle. "On the contrary, I've never seen Starfleet productivity go up ever since we've strayed from the stagnant starship program and went into racial sitcoms!" He looked up and raised his hands to form a screen of sorts. "Think of it. The Johnson Family Vacations aboard the Starship Intrepid, on a weekly basis. It'll make lots of money for Movie Night!"

"You've shut down our space program for dumb feature films that no one would pay money for even in the twenty-first century?!" Archer was undoubtedly flabbergasted, as his tone of voice would indicate. "You're absolutely deranged, Admiral! And I'm not going to stand for it." From his uniform pouch, Archer pulled out a datapad and slapped it on Mooney's glass desk. "You see that, Admiral?! It's called a PETITION!"

Mooney studied the pad less than carefully. "A petition, you say?"

"That's right, damn you!" Archer said as he smashed his fist onto the glass desk, cracking it slightly. "A petition to end your nefarious ways and restore the starship program! Most importantly, they want you to bring back Enterprise and her crew so we can continue with our journey of exploration!"

Mooney grunted unimpressed by Archer's threats and tosses the pad out the window. "Your program stays dead. The decision to cancel the starship program is FINAL!"

Archer hung his head, but slowly rose to face Mooney. He hadn't come this far to give up.

"Okay, you asked for it." Reaching for his communicator, Archer made contact with the Public Transporter base. "Beam my companion aboard."

Suddenly, a second transport beam flashed next to Captain Archer and from the beam emerge a tall, menacing figure in a black cloak and black life-sustaining armor suit. He wore a helmet that looked like the face of death himself. He slowly raised his hand towards Mooney, who suddenly realized who this individual was... because he is almost iconic!

"Y-You're Anakin Skywalker!" Mooney cried then held his throat. "NO! YOU'RE DARTH VADER?! I'll get sued for sure! Gah!"

The black-suited man sighed. "Damn those prequels for sullying my evil name and great title as ultimate villain of the universe." With that, he slightly raised his hand to the air and both he and Archer watched as Mooney struggle haplessly to release the invisible grip crushing his throat. After what seemed like an eternity, but in reality thirty seconds, the Sith Lord dropped his hand and Mooney crumbled on the ground, letting out one last gasp before dying for good!

"Thanks, Mr. Vader," Archer said as he gripped on the hand of the Dark Lord of the Sith, "I'll be sure to put in a good word for your upcoming feature film."

Vader merely nodded and walked away while Archer looked back at Mooney, who was somehow regaining consciousness despite having been force choked to death. By channeling the spirit of another evil Galactic Emperor, Archer assumed that it was too dangerous to leave him alive and promptly pulled out a Phase Pistol from his side pocket, shooting the admiral in the head. Then he left Starfleet HQ to go to the shipyards in hopes of rebuilding his Enterprise and buy it out.

Six years or so later, the Federation was founded... but we're getting ahead of ourselves here.

THE END... FOR NOW

691 - Power Rangers Retrospective Revisited #3 - Blue Ranger Be Bad

2012-02-13T11:21:00.002-05:00

Originally written and posted on August 2nd, 2007. It is the 594th post of DTM Blog Classic. This was later reposted on July 16, 2010 as the 140th post of this blog.

There are seldom few updates and reflections on this one. So, for the most part, this is a straightforward copy and paste job of the same blog that had been post here a year and a half ago. Cheap, but efficient.

Jumping ahead to the tail end of the second season, today's episode is Blue Ranger Gone Bad. Just guess who's the central character in this episode. If you've guessed Billy, give yourself a cookie. Now guess what the episode is about. If you've guessed Billy overcoming his shyness to ask a girl out, give yourself another cookie. Now guess what Zedd's plan revolves around... actually, don't bother with that one. You're probably out of cookies anyway.

(2012 Update: They can always buy more. They're fairly cheap.)

The episode opens up with the Ranger teens in art class. Tommy takes potery. Kimberly takes up painting. Billy, being the nerd that he is, decides to build a hologram (which is a mirror-like thingie - keep this in mind. It's important) Before Billy could explain how a holographic disc constitutes an art project, we cut to Bulk & Skull showing Art Teacher their crappy statue that I might be able to recreate with a bucket of Playdoh. According to them, it's a statue of the Power Rangers, but really, it looks more like a close-up representation of snot. A bit of advice, guys: let someone else do the work for you.

We then cut back to the next girl-interest for Billy, Girl #210, who shows off her project, which is a grey statue of Billy - Billy is flattered by the uncanny resemblence of him. (2012 Update: It's not a bad looking statue, actually. Almost looks like Billy.) That leads to the next sequence where the classroom is empty and Goldar takes over the room! Oh dear lord! Goldar has conquered the Art Class Room! Will anyone stop this madman?!

Ahem.

Zedd decides to chant before making his move, which prompts Rita to swipe the man's staff and do the deed faster with the much simpler "Blue Ranger Be Bad!" Well, it works... as the statue now becomes Billy or rather a clone. He even gets some of the mannerisms down, what with the slouching and hands in the pockets. Yay. Time for a commercial.

When we get back, Billy is considering asking Girl #210 out to a movie and his friends agree, because not agreeing would go against the mandate of Power Rangers. It seems so nice to have a circle of friends that will agree with every decision you make, even if it's the wrong one... but I digress. Suddenly, the Rangers get attacked by putties and this leads to Putty Fight #563. In a moment of distraction, Billy is taken away by vines and sent to another dimension. The owner of the living vines was never revealed, just like the driver of the hummer which ran over Kevin Nash in WCW was never revealed. Damn writers can't think up a simple name to go with a role. Someone ought to write a fanfic about that... don't look my way.

So now Billy is trapped in the evil Dark Dimension - the original one where Jason and Goldar had that awesome fight in the first season of MMPR - where he meets with Goldar, the two useless stooges, and our monster of the day, Billy-clone. Billy watches the clone as he is given real-Billy's goods and tells him that his friends would never believe he's real, which seems to indicate that our main-brain Billy has forgotten the cardinal rule of Angel Grove City: people are predominantly stupid because a smart person would check out the teen's preference of colors, compare them with the Rangers, and put the two together. The clone goes off on his mission to infiltrate the Rangers, while Goldar pulls a conveniently placed switch that fills the room (or rather Billy's side of the room) with sleeping gas... or maybe it's cigarette smoke. Who knows?

When we cut back to the exciting drama, Billy-clone decides to fit in with the others by declaring that instead of studying for the upcoming math class, he'll lift weights. Weights? Are you fucking kidding me? I mean, sure, Billy's mass had steadily increased since his initial appearance on the show, but I would rather attribute that to Billy taking some steroid-type formula of his own design as opposed to any physical activity on his part... certainly a better explanation than saying Billy's more built and active because David Yost (actor who plays Billy) goes to the gym regularly.

Next scene, we see Billy-clone lifting weights - thus showing that despite being a villain and evil clone, he is an evil clone of his word. Despite the fact that Billy has never been seen lifting weights nor has he ever shown any relative interest before in any particular episode prior to or since this one, the Rangers attribute it to Billy simply acting weird. Remember what I said about the cardinal rule? You'd think one of them would have realized that Billy never lifts weights and would single him out as the clone. In another "weird" moment, Billy approaches the bar where Girl #210 has been waiting for him. Despite her attempts at catching his attention, Billy-clone ignores her and she leaves. Good riddance if you ask me.

(2012 Update: Considering his recent coming out interview, one has to wonder if this is how David Yost treats members of the opposite sex that wanted in his pants. Oh, I'm gonna get it now, aren't I?)

Dropping the girl talk, Billy-clone cuts to the chase and asks for the other Rangers' communicators due to some technical mumbo-jumbo that goes over the others' heads. All the Rangers (except Tommy the White Ranger TM) surrender their goods (while unaware that Billy-clone has also taken their morphers - never mind the means of doing so.) Thus, we declare Tommy the Smartest Ranger of the Episode by withholding his own wrist-watch instead of surrendering it to Billy-clone - he should be proud because it's the only smart thing he's ever done in his whole Ranger career.

(2012 Update: Yeah, but see, even this doesn't explain how the guy became a doctor.)

Now we cut to the park and after some suspicious behavior from "Billy" (which is mainly him saying he left his hologram disc at home... even though he never went home), Tommy continues his "smartness" by contacting Zordon to confirm orders to modify the communicators. As expected, Zordon says there's nothing wrong with the communicators. Rita, realizing the jig is up, sends Goldar and putties after the Rangers, who soon realize that they are missing their morphers and accused Billy-clone of the crime. Yeah, because Billy-clone likes to stick his hand up people's asses.

During the scuffle, Kim takes Billy's bag of morphers, communicators, and Playboy magazines (2012 Update: Or is it Playgirl? Har, har, har... oh boy, I'm feeling it now.) and tosses it up a tree where it is left hanging. Oh yeah, that's a smart move. Of course, the fact that the Rangers don't have their morphers is not much of a disadvantage as they still manage to beat up Goldar and the putties. Anyone who actually surprised by this should stop reading right now... or send a better monster. In this case, our monster of the day is created from Tommy's art project (I was almost tempted to write Tommy's pot) and he proceeds to zap the Rangers with explosions.

One quick note: in the scene where the Ranger teens are being exploded, Kim's hair seems to cover her face. I wonder if this was a stand-in for Amy Jo or if she just hated the little sparkly thingies and needed to protect herself by hiding behind her hair. This kinda, sorta baffles me a bit.

Meanwhile, Billy discovers that he can short out Goldar's force field by deflecting the laser with his hologram disc - you know, the one he left at home. With Billy free from the force field, Alpha detects him on the scanner and teleports him to the battle field where he encounters the clone as he grabs the backpack of goodies. Stupidly, the clone falls as soon as he grabs the bag, allowing Billy to pick up the bag and toss it to the other Rangers, all of whom seemingly recovered from the explosive sparklers. Billy and clone then morpher (a cool dual-morph sequence) and nobody can figure out which Billy is which. They quickly figure out which is the fake Billy and which is the real Billy. How? Well, the fake Billy calls the hologram disc a mirror... okay.

With the fake exposed, the real Billy stands side-by-side with the other Rangers and they all shoot laser beams at the clone. The clone Ranger does a nice job of deflecting a few laser shots (which effectively makes him a better Ranger than the heroes themselves - think about that), but eventually gets overwhelmed by sparklers from his suit and disappears in a cheap flash of light. It's at this point in time that we ask "What the hell happened here? Did the clone die or did he quickly escape, never to be seen again?" Who knows what happened, although this particular conundrum has inspired a couple fanfics to be written... really good reads if you know which ones I'm talking about. Either way, it's safe to assume that he's dead... some death scene. Cheap bastards.

(2012 Update: There was actually a good fanfic written about how the Rangers got the wrong Billy and sent the real one back to the moon. I don't recall the name, but it involved the clone Billy being a devious bastard and using "real" means to attempt to off the others.)

But anyway, let's not forget that we have a monster to confront and toys to sell. So Zedd makes the monster grow, Rangers summon their zords, they fight, and the monster is defeated. Yay. You know, I sort of wish they started mixing up the format a bit. At least in some first season eps, the Power Blaster was more than enough to kill a monster. (In fact, the next couple episodes being reviewed breaks the mold a bit.)

In the final moments of our episode, Billy goes up to Girl #210 and asks her out. Word has it the relationship didn't last long because Billy wouldn't lift weights. Meanwhile, Bulk and Skull reveal their art project to the class (proudly admitting that someone else did the work for them) that will serve as a gift to the Power Rangers: a small statue of Billy The Gold Ranger.

No wonder people would assume Billy would be the Gold Ranger in Power Rangers Zeo - they watched this show and pointed it out as evidence.

FINAL ANALYSIS: We rarely get a decent Billy episode and while thi. It's a fairly solid episode that makes limited use of its Sentai footage and focuses on presenting a gripping (in terms of childrens' television) story that is the focus of the episode. This type of Ranger episode would eventually translate into multi-episode story arcs and would even dominate an entire series in the form of Power Rangers In Space, which was a space-based series despite the fact that the original Sentai it's based on was a video game concept. Looking back on those days, it's truly sad that watching these old episodes with the limited budgets and cheap production values have manage to hold up fairly well and entertain me more than the current crop of Ranger shows - which are essentially effortless cut-and-paste jobs intending more on selling toys than presenting anything resembling a good show.

Blue Ranger Gone Bad is a solid episode; not one of the best, but still a great show.

690 - Speaking of TMNT...

2012-02-13T10:59:00.001-05:00

Ninjaturtles.com has yet to be updated... they're still advertising something Turtle-related to be coming in 2011 from Nickelodeon. Someone should let the guys at Nick know that...

IT'S 2012!

689 - TMNT #5

2012-02-13T10:53:00.001-05:00

Just been recently catching up with the new TMNT series from IDW and I just came across issue 5, which kinda, sorta brings an interesting angle to the overall origin story. I'm sort of split on the premise of reincarnation; it's interesting and unique, but I'm not sure if I can really get into it. Regardless, I'd be lying if I said they haven't peaked my curiosity with this one, so I'm curious to say where they go with this.

Perhaps the biggest thing to come out of this is that the Turtles trade in their original red badannas for the colored ones that have been prominent in various television, movies, and other media that isn't the original Mirage comic books. I'd be lying if I said this didn't surprise me, but it is certainly something that I didn't see coming. I know there's bound to be some folks who are a little iffed by this, but I personally don't have an issue with this. Would it have been cooler if they stuck with the red ones? Sure, it would. But at the end of the day, this isn't the old Mirage universe. It's a reimagined one with fewer shell puns... fucking Dirk.

I kinda like how they're taking various elements from the various mediums (one of the micro-series books apparently feature human Bebop and Rocksteady) and merging them into a new narrative storyline. It's a different take on the Turtles and whether it ends up being worth a damn or not, at least you can't say that it's going to be predictable. As long as they maintain the style and substance that made the original TMNT such a joy to read and such, then it's damn well going to be a fun ride.

If nothing else, it'll give me some fodder for more Turtle talk around here.

688 - Against All Creativity

2012-02-13T01:41:00.000-05:00

Bobby Roode retains his world title at the main event due to shenanigans. Get this; Roode spits on special referee Sting's face, who retaliates with a belt shot. Roode steps aside and Sting ends up hitting Hardy instead. Roode goes for the pin and Sting does the slow count for the win... GEE, HAVEN'T I SEEN THIS BEFORE?

Yes, it's been ages since the last time such a finish was booked, but J.H.C.

Sad part is that this looks to be building towards Sting vs. Roode for the title.

I hope not. I honestly don't want another Sting title reign.

TNA is just starting to not suck now.

Oh, and on a sidenote, I saw Garrett Bischoff show up on my TV and thought it'd be the perfect opportunity to take a dump. Man, that had to be one of the longest dumps I ever took. Imagine my surprise when Uncle Eric's son was still on TV and in a match. Thus I sat through the rest of the match... which bored me to tears.

Are we sure Vince Russo isn't heading creative anymore?

687 - Track & Field (NES) Re-Review

2012-02-13T01:27:00.000-05:00

686 - Track & Field Review Commentary

2012-02-13T01:26:00.000-05:00

First time I'm doing a commentary on one of my own videos. Went pretty well, in my mind. May very well do more of these in the future.

685 - NC17 Does Have A Good Video

2012-02-12T18:24:00.002-05:00

Was going to upload two NC17 commentaries, but really, this is the only one I need to do.

684 - About The Fanfiction

2012-02-12T03:04:00.003-05:00

On again... off again... that seems to be the case with me. Fortunately, things seem to be looking up somewhat. Will be finishing off updating the remainder of Will To Live, which is also undergoing "slight" tweakings. I'm presently working on two old fanfics that are getting drastically reworked to the point of being completely somewhat different beasts for the most part. May complete reuploading the trilogy first... we'll see.

Who knows? Maybe this sudden burst of inspiration will cause me to write something new... or start up on that virtual season that I sorta teased a couple months back and even planned a whole blog based on the concept.

We'll see about that one, huh?

683 - A Bevy of Commentaries Tonight

2012-02-12T02:59:00.003-05:00

Will be posting three commentary videos on this fine* Sunday morning. Two commentaries cover videos by familiar subject matter, Kenny The NC17 Guy, while another will be on one of my own videos from two years ago. Which video you ask? Here's a hint: Constant Button Mashing.

Should be interesting.

682 - NC and Linkara "review" Star Trek: Insurrection

2012-02-10T11:12:00.003-05:00

Typical crossover thingy with skits and stuff. Honestly, though, there's no point. RedLetterMedia did it so much better.

681 - Amazing Spider-Man trailer... meh.

2012-02-09T10:33:00.000-05:00

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=86680

Looks nice, but I'm not digging this "untold story" angle that they're going for here. Not only is the Spider-Man origin story the furthest thing from "untold story" you're going to get, but it seems like they're retooling it to be some sort of destiny thing as opposed to being by chance. Not to mention that I'm not a fan of the suit... but hey, they brought back the Spidey wit; something that was missing from the Sam Raimi entries.

Cautiously middle of the road on this one; looking forward to it, but not particularly impressed thus far.

680 - A Positive About The New YouTube Channel Layout

2012-02-08T23:52:00.001-05:00

There's one good thing about the new layout. Yeah, it looks horrible and the lack of significant customability is a major issue I have with the layout, but there is one silver lining to this next wave of change:

I can add more links.

So not only can I add this blog to the homepage, but also the review blog and the alternate Dailymotion account. Something you couldn't do with the old layout... even though you could do slightly more. Or something...

679 - Take a gander at the review archive

2012-02-08T10:20:00.000-05:00

We got lots of reviews there... including stuff that I'm too lazy to repost here.

Check it out.

678 - Wrestlemania Sign Posting Updating

2012-02-07T09:50:00.001-05:00

From TheScore.Ca, a listing of every instance where someone points at the big Wrestlemania sign. Just brilliant.

677 - You Know What Amazes Me?

2012-02-06T11:25:00.001-05:00

The fact that Daniel Bryan Danielson is still World Heavyweight Champion... unbelievable. In a match against two other big men, he managed to retain his title and hasn't dropped it between PPVs. That is amazing. Could this be for real?

Piss off, kids. Let me enjoy the moment while it lasts...

676 - Mega Man!

2012-02-05T02:04:00.001-05:00

675 - The Return Of ViB113 Warrants A Vlog... And An Updated Commentary

2012-02-04T20:15:00.002-05:00

Posted the commentary last month on Dailymotion, but since ViB113 (the fellow in the vids) has made his return, I re-uploaded a slightly edited version on the 'Tubes... along with this video.

674 - Rad Reviews (Extended Edition)

2012-02-04T20:13:00.002-05:00

Commentary - Rad Reviews (Extended Edition) by crisisded

Back in 2010, I did a 2-part commentary for a bunch of "reviews" from Youtuber radreviews, who had given up doing reviews. This is essentially the same commentary with both parts merged and slightly updated bits. It's the first of many videos I got up today.

673 - WWE on YouTube

2012-02-03T12:21:00.001-05:00

WWE finally made use of their long-dormant, half-assed YouTube page and began to add new content, including Dolph Ziggler becoming WWE's version of Ray William Johnson, an Inbox show, and Zack Ryder's long-running YouTube show that got him noticed. So glad that WWE is giving fans great content. It's just too bad you can't share your thoughts on the show, since all comments have been disabled on their videos. What class, WWE.

Hey, say what you will about TNA and their product (and I've said my bit on their 2011 output) but at least they LET fans comment on their YouTube stuff. If nothing, that company seems very fan-friendly and I can't really fault them for that.

672 - Notice

2012-02-03T05:41:00.001-05:00

Some of may have noticed strange messages being posted on the blog. This is NOT my doing, but rather a glitch that is sending e-mails from my e-mail address... sure enough being posted on the blog due to the blog-by-mail feature. I'm going to disable the feature and so any strange messages won't be showing up here.

Apologies.

671 - NES Clone Comparison (Why The Hell Not?)

2012-02-03T00:50:00.002-05:00

A damn near twenty minute long video endeavor, watch as I mumble and fumble my way through a bunch of NES clones to see which one plays Super Mario Bros the best. This was something I wanted to get done for the longest time possible and I'm glad to have it all done. It was a fun experiment and now I can start clearing up some space.

670 - Power Rangers SUPAH SAMARAI!

2012-02-02T11:42:00.002-05:00

Old news, but Nick is set to start airing the new season of Power Rangers Samurai in a week or two. But it isn't just Power Rangers Samurai, but rather Power Rangers SUPER Samurai... because they're super, you know... why not stick with plain old Samurai? Adding Super in there... I don't know, it sounds less like a title for a new season and more like a title for a new Super Nintendo release... SUPER Samurai... meh.

I guess I better catch up and start watching me some vanilla Samurai. Good thing it's on Netflix Canada.

SUPAH SAMARAI... yeah, how does the theme song work there?

669 - Chyna Goes Crazy On Twitter

2012-02-02T11:09:00.002-05:00

From Scott Keith's blog, a collection of incoherent Twitter ramblings from Chyna... and then she wonders why WWE or TNA want nothing to do with her... well, aside from the whole porn career she's undergoing.

Thank fucking gawd I don't have Twitter.

668 - Old Pick Sheet for WWE No Mercy 2002

2012-02-02T11:07:00.001-05:00

2012 Update: One of the problems with these old PPV predictions, especially the 2002-2003 ones, is the lack of a consistent format. So I'm left having to redo all the formatting so that it somewhat matches up with the current stock.

This is going to be posted as is with little input from me today. Quite frankly, I barely recall the show and I don't have a copy available to watch. Frankly, if I had, I'd probably redo this whole form from scratch... but since I don't, you get to enjoy this horrible text. So other than minor format tweaks and minor edits, this is all from 2002. Enjoy.

WWE No Mercy 2002
I'm going to start this commentary off officially with a brief recap of matches that I predicted. The comments in brackets are the actual results, so let's start this off:

Rob Van Dam vs. Ric Flair
This is a tough one to call. On the one hand, Ric Flair lost to Chris Jericho. On the other hand, RVD is fodder for Jericho and Triple punkass H. My money is on RVD.

Winner: RVD (1-0)

Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie
Okay, if both women wear revealing outfits, the fans are the winners!!! Um... seriously, though. They actually stuck this on a Pay-Per-View?!

Winner: Torrie Wilson. No prediction made and I don't recall what they wore. (1-0)

Rey Mysterio & Edge vs. Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit for the WWE (Smackdown) Tag-Team Championship
The Smackdown! Brand are getting their own tag belts. I think Angle & Benoit should get the belts. Why? Well, aside from the fact that Kurt Angle has yet to hold a Tag Belt, I don't think Edge needs to be pushed into the tag-wrestler position again... neither should Rey Rey or whatever you call him.

Winners: Benoit & Angle (2-0) MATCH OF THE NIGHT IMHO

Chris Jericho & Christian vs. Booker T and Goldust for the World (Eric Bischoff's RAW) Tag-Team Championship
Um... have the Canadian Blondes drop the straps to Bookdust, sucka!

Winners: Jericho & Christian (2-1)

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria for the World (Eric Bischoff's RAW) Women's Championship
Um... Vicky wins... why? I don't know...

Winner: Trish wins (2-2)

World (Eric Bischoff's RAW) Heavyweight Champion Triple H vs. Intercontinental (Eric Bischoff's RAW) Heavyweight Champion Kane in a Winner-Takes-All Title Unification Match
Kane, you're a World Heavyweight Championship Murderer!!!!

Winner: HHH (2-3)

And Brock wins over Taker in the Cell match. I was right (3-3), but then so was everyone else. There is a match missing (the Cruiserweight title match) but since this was a last-minute thing and I didn't know about its booking, it doesn't count. Needless to say, Jamie Noble retains his title over Tajiri. It will be hard to believe that the only credible title these days is the cruiserweight championship, since Noble has been champ since June.

(2012 Update: That credibility for the title wouldn't last, I'm afraid.)

Like I said, haven't seen this show in a long time. Don't care to comment on it. Done.

667 - Power Rangers Retrospective Revisited #2 - Second Chances

2012-02-02T10:51:00.001-05:00

Originally written back in February 2007 and is the 429th entry on DTM Blog Classic. When I reposted this on this blog the first time around, I actually went back and added a couple bits here and there, but nothing that would totally ruin the text. Nowadays, I'd just add quick (not too many) modern-day thoughts without interrupting the original text... much like what I did last time.

As a final note, this episode features the child actor who grew up to be an adult murderer. It was something that never occured to me during either the original writing or later editing and it was also something that I don't bring up. In fact, this is the only time I'll mention it, because the main subject is not about how some kid grew up and did something horrible. The main subject is about my reflections on an episode of Power Rangers. I'd like to keep it that way.

So here's a completely random one from the second half of the first season. At this point, Saban had run dry on usable Zyuranger footage (the Super Sentai show from Japan that the original MMPR was based on), so in a completely baffling move that has yet to be repeated in future iterations of the franchise, he commissioned new Japanese footage to be shot. Just as well, because a cheap bastard like Saban couldn't pull off what was needed to keep the show going. It's also here where the footage (christened by fans as Zyu-2) is somewhat cleaner than before; you can still tell the two apart, but it doesn't have that aged grain that the older Zyu footage possessed in early episodes.

(2012 Update: Zyu2 footage also seem to have perks and characteristics of the Mighty Morphin run, such as an intelligent Blue Ranger and a budding relationship between the Green and Pink Rangers. It almost made me wish that the rest of the seasons were done in this fashion instead of the mishmash between American, Zyuranger, Dairanger, and later Kakuranger footage that caused a major discontinuity, but what do I know? The show made money regardless.)

So we begin the episode at everyone's favorite Youth Center, where a bunch of kids have just discovered they made it to Ernie's soccer team. Seems baffling to me that someone like Ernie would run a soccer team, but I've seen far stranger cases before, so I'll let that pass. The only kid that seems to be depressed because he didn't make the team is Roger, who has this weird Southern accent that seems highly inappropriate in a Californian setting. So Jason and Zack, our two Rangers for the day, pressure (disguised cleverly as trying to convince) Ernie into holding a second try-out. That's cool; what are you going to do with all the extra signees? Make another soccer team out of them? Yeesh.

Meanwhile, Rita decides to create a soccer monster. Because in every episode of Power Rangers, we need to have some stupid gimmick monster show up. But hey, I digress. It works and you know it won't last long because he'll be done by the end of the episode (although he'd get some guest spots later in the show, but let's not jump ahead here.)

So now Jason and Zack are helping the kid Roger get better at soccer by tossing balls at him so he can stop them with his foot. Well, that's a bit unfair, isn't it? You're tossing the balls with your bare hands and you have to stop them with your foot? Why don't you just kick the ball? Or better yet, just kick the giant armadillo monster curled up into a ball that just appeared a few seconds later. That would have been funnier than the brief skit of putties kicking the monster around.

During the latest adventure of Bulk and Skull hilarities, Tommy's communicator gets busted, which leads to hilarity when it's been confiscated by the teacher whom assumes it must be some kind of pager. Hey, I'd say it's pretty impressive if the world of Power Rangers can invent watches with built-in pagers. I doubt we have that sort of thing... not that we really need it. You know, now that I think about it, maybe Tommy wasn't such a great Ranger after all. I mean, if your communicator is confiscated by MS. APPLEBEE, it's time to call it quits. But don't let the fanboys know about that or they'll throw a fit.

(2012 Update: Rewatching some older episodes of Power Rangers and revisiting some of Tommy's stupid decision making processes makes me wonder what was so great about him. Sure, he went through a bunch of suits... but SO DID ADAM.)

So while the Ranger get their asses kicked by this Soccerdillo, Tommy finally gets back his communicator, presumably by breaking into a martial arts routine and scaring the crap out of poor Ms. Applebee when his puppy-dog expression doesn't whoo her over. Tommy learns of the Rangers in peril and morphs into action. From there, the Ranger suddenly have the advantage over the monster, which prompts Rita to throw her magic wand and make the monster grow. And you know the routine from here on out; the Rangers summon their Zords, form the Megazord, they fight for a while, and then kill the monster with Ultrazord. Rita gets a headache. Hope she stocked up on some alcohol... seems to do the trick.

With the monster slain, we close the show with the revelation that the kid Roger made it to the soccer team, is appointed as captain... hey, wait a minute. The guy couldn't make the team the first time around, but now he's the captain?! Either he got way better or Ernie lowered his standards... I'm thinking it's the latter. Also, what about the previous captain who made it THE FIRST TIME? How do you break the news that he lost the role to a pipsqueak who couldn't cut it the first time? Do you think he'd be happy that he's a co-captain?

And of course, we close the episode with more Bulk & Skull hijinx. It gets too repetitive at this point and Bulk & Skull kinda lost their luster as a pure slapstick team, but the next season would give them a purpose and much needed energy. But that's the next season... and perhaps the next episode I'll be looking at.

(2012 Update: Bulk & Skull are an almost classic comedic duo whose antics would get REALLY good in Zeo. Watching some of the older MMPR stuff, I wasn't really feeling it.)

2007 FINAL ANALYSIS: Second Chance is a typically standard filler episode. Nothing particularly noteworthy happened here and it seemed like for the most part, nothing of note was going to happen until the second season was going to start up. But in any case, as far as fillers go, this isn't the worst of the lot, but it doesn't really stand out as a special filler either. It's just there.

2012 FINAL ANALYSIS: I was pretty bored for the most part with this episode. Even with the foreknowledge of what happens to the child actor, this seemed like a lower key episode of MMPR. The whole thing just smacked of sleep-inducing. Just about the only highlight in the episode was Ms. Appleby confiscating Tommy's "pager" and Tommy attempting to get it back... which I still maintain was done with martial arts violence. It sort of explains Ms. Appleby's early attitude towards our Green fellow. Maybe she's wondering what's so "great" about Tommy, too... but she eventually warms in the next season, I guess.

As far as Second Chances go, completely forgettable fare.

666 - Pac-Man Collection (Atari 7800)

2012-02-01T02:01:00.001-05:00

Eerie thing about this video... 200th YouTube video, 666th Blog Post. Pac-Man scares me...

665 - The World Does NOT Need Taker/HHH I Lost Count

2012-01-31T20:39:00.001-05:00

A couple quick thoughts on last night's RAW

* First off, it was awfully nice of WWE to book a CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan Danielson match. Would have been nice if the match had closed the show instead of HHH showing up and giving me a reason to go to bed early at the end. The match was really good stuff while it lasted, only for Chris Jericho to make his move and throw a damper on things. Punk/Jericho should be pretty interesting, to say the least... but this makes me more hungry for another go between Punk and Bryan.

* Mike Tyson into the WWE Hall Of Fame... well, it's better than Drew Carey, that much I'll tell you.

* Oh, boy. Another HHH/Taker match at Wrestlemania... BOOORRRIIINNNNGGGGG.... And speaking of which, apparently Johnny Ace is still gonna be around. LAME.

Not really much to say, but the show was alright. I stayed awake, at least.

664 - Thoughts On Last Month's WWE TLC PPV Offering... Those Are A Lot Of Acronyms

2012-01-30T11:30:00.002-05:00

I've yet to watch this year's Royal Rumble, but a friend had promised he'd send me a copy of the show this week. He did, however, send me last month's TLC PPV, so there's that. So I decided to share some musings with this PPV that most of you have probably already seen. This isn't an up-and-up report or anything; just random observations and musings on the show, similar to how I approach the RAW Bytes, so to speak.

* Interestingly enough, John Cena was not ever featured on the card. Strange that they wouldn't try to shoehorn him into a title picture or at least inconsequential bonus match or anything like that, but sure enough, the crowd was spared (?) from sitting through a Cena match. I certainly didn't shed a tear over a lack of Cena, but I was pleasantly surprised.

* So Zack Ryder finally beats Dolph Ziggler to win his first United States championship. Not a bad match to start up and it was cool to see this feud built mostly on YouTube finally pay off in a nice way. I also thought it was cool to see Zack's dad finally cheer for his son instead of that spot monkey with shades who was recently future endeavored. What sort of dulls me on this match is knowing that this reign wouldn't last long and that WWE's handling of Ryder would teeter on the edge of "god-fucking-awful." On its own, however, it was a nice little moment to witness.

* Never got into the tag title match between Air Boom and Primo/Epico. It was okay, I guess, but I wasn't really feeling it. Air Boom would retain the titles here, but lose them to Primo/Epico on the house show circuit. Amazingly, they're still champions as of this writing. That's cool, I guess.

* Orton/Barrett was okayish, don't care about the Divas match, and I don't care about the clusterfuck HHH/Nash ladder match that damn near put me to sleep even on fast-forward. How is that even possible? To be fair, both HHH and Nash tried, but both men are older and aren't as ripe as they used to be. It should have been short and sweet, but it was twenty minutes too long and it put me to fucking sleep. It was twenty minutes too long when they had a match in 2003 and both were younger and only tore one quad a piece... oh wait. But hey, as long as this bullshit feud is over and done with, I'm mildly content.

* Jack Swagger succumbing to Sheamus' Brogue Kick of Death. Quick and painless; suitable for TV, not so much for PPV. I'm guessing this was added at the last minute to accomodate some stuff. I had thought that with all the Cody Rhodes/Booker T stuff going on, this was supposed to be a replacement for that match-up... but that match did happen (Cody won, by the way.) Sooooo.... what's the deal?

* The World Title match between Mark Henry and Big Show was rather short and sweet... probably due to Henry's injury. Big Show winning the title was a bit of a shock. Certainly can't say that he didn't deserve it, but seeing Daniel Bryan cash in his contract and practically "steal" the title was a pleasant surprise when I heard about it and watching it now, it certainly pleases me that he would finally get the World Title... even if it was through less-than-desirable means. Still, his little victory celebration was fun to watch, especially with his shoutout to those who followed him on the indy trail.

* Tremendous TLC for the WWE Championship, with Punk retaining the title. Rather nasty (but good) table splash that Ricardo did at one point, lots of nice stuff going on here, solid main event match, no real complaints. It was great.

On a whole, this was another B-level gimmick show that I was ready to write off as worthless and they managed to produce something watchable. There were some matches I couldn't get into or didn't care for, but the title matches were truly the highlights of the night, with new champions that internet wrestling smarks would be pleased with. On a whole, I thought this was a pretty good show and it was pretty entertaining stuff for the most part. I probably would not have payed full-price for the PPV, but maybe this was worth getting the DVD. Good stuff, all around.

663 - Is Foley Good?

2012-01-29T19:21:00.002-05:00

662 - Big Rigs

2012-01-28T12:38:00.002-05:00

661 - WWE Unforgiven 2002

2012-01-25T11:26:00.001-05:00

Unforgiven 2002... quite honestly, I don't remember too much about this one, outside of what I can recall and recount from when I wrote the original predictions sheet back in 2002. But the show itself was a total blank for me. It might have been a decent show, all things considered, but not a memorable one, I suppose. Oh well.

Eight-man Tag-Team Match:
The Un-Americans (William Regal, Lance Storm, Christian, Test) vs. Kane, Booker T, Goldust, and Bubba Ray Dudley
2002 Pick: Hard to determine... considering no titles are on the line in this potential wankfest, I will have to go with the Un-Americans... um, don't ask...

Results: The Un-Americans didn't win. Okay, I was wrong here. 0-1

2012 Update: I've honestly felt that someone at WWE was trying to fuck me over with these predictions, as the past two matches, I picked against the UnAmericans and they won. This show, I pick them to win... and they lose. Seriously, I had this conspiracy in mind... I wondered if someone from WWE actually read this stuff.

WWE Women's Championship Match:
Molly Holly (champion) vs. Trish Stratus
2002 Pick: Eye-candy... who cares?

Result: Trish Stratus defeated Molly Holly to win the Women's Title... but I was right... eye-candy, who cares? 1-1

2012 Update: Geez, was I always this much of a dick with the Divas matches? I ought to tell 2002 Dave that if he thought THAT was bad, he wouldn't survive the gluttony of piss-break quality DIVAS matches on display here. I'm sure the match was alright... again, i's been a long while.

Edge vs. Eddie Guerrero
2002 Pick: Something is wrong here... In a month's time, Edge has gone from teaming with Hulk Hogan to feuding with Eddie Guerrero, although when you think about, it is either a bad thing or a good thing... oh yeah, Edge wins.

Result: Eddie wins... er, yeah. 1-2

2012 Update: Both would eventually be future World Champions... of course, one would be retired while the other would pass away... both before their time... that's really all I got, man.

Inter-Promotional Tag-Team Bout
Rosie & Jamal (with RAW GM Eric Bischoff) vs. Billy & Chuck (with Smackdown! GM Stephanie McMahon)
Additional Stipulations: If the Smackdown team won, Uncle Eric had to kiss Stephanie's ass. If the RAW team won, Stephanie had to perform Hot Lesbian Action... which had something to do with lesbians. This was a pretty fucked-up deal in WWE.

2002 Pick: As much as I would like to see Rosie & Jamal randomly squash people, they haven't been in a "real" WWE match. So their team doesn't have much credibility. So I'm gonna go with Rosie & Jamal for the simple reason that I wanna see a win under their belt... no, really, it's my only (HLA!) reason.

Winners: The two Samoans (RAW) wins. Unfortunately, we have no HLA. But we do have Rikishi in drag. I was right. (2-2)

2012 Update: Rikishi in drag is nothing compared to the horror that would be Big Dick Johnson. Just saying.

WWE Intercontinental Championship Match
Chris Jericho (champion) vs. "Nature Boy" Ric Flair
2002 Pick: Although the chances of it happening is about as likely as Duane Gill being World Champion, I would very much like to see Ric Flair win the strap from Jericho... let's face it (and since Y2J doesn't care about the Internet anymore, I won't hold back), Jericho shouldn't even have a belt like this. If you ask me, he should jump back to Smackdown and beat the living snot out of that punk Lesnar... as for Flair, give him a belt that isn't something he's held before. It will only add to his title history.

Winner: Jericho wins by playing dirty and faking a serious injury. Heck, I was wrong. Don't worry, Ric. You'll get that title someday in a couple years time. 2-3

2012 Update: While the comment was most likely made in jest, Ric Flair would eventually claim his first Intercontinental championship in 2005, defeating then-champion Carlito for the prize. Hey, I wasn't that far off, actually.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit
2002 Pick: Great technical match under the hat... who cares?

Winner: Chris Benoit wins. I didn't make a prediction here, but the match was good so... 3-3

2012 Update: Anytime you have Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit in the same ring, you're bound to have a great wrestling match on display. Their 2003 encounter at the Royal Rumble for the WWE Championship is another one... somewhat odd that I'd say something positivie about Chris Benoit considering how his life ended and all, but whatever.

[RAW] World Heavyweight Championship Match
Triple H (champion) vs. Rob Van Dam
2002 Pick: Just give RVD the damn belt for goodness sake.

Result: HHH wins the match and retains the title, right after a "shocking" betrayal from Ric Flair. 3-4

2012 Update: At the time, I wasn't too thrilled with the prospect of HHH retaining his title and thus "burying" RVD as a result. However, perspective has cleared my head and the end result makes sense even if I'm not particularly fond of it. Not necessarily in establishing the seeds for the Evolution stable to come, but rather in legitimizing WWE's new World title. It wouldn't look good to have HHH lose his newly-awarded Big Gold Belt in his first major defense and we want the belt to actually, you know, mean something... funny how that works, since belts nowadays mean fuck all.

Also, in another way, it was probably a good idea NOT to give RVD a world title. Wouldn't want your champion to get bust for carrying pot or something.)

[SMACKDOWN] WWE World Heavyweight Championship
Brock Lesnar (champion) vs. Undertaker
2002 Pick: Lesnar... he always wins... which means a pretty boring and predictable match... WHY IS THIS THE MAIN EVENT WHEN THE [RAW] WORLD TITLE MATCH IS A POTENTIALLY BETTER AND VIABLE CHOICE?

RESULT: I don't remember who won, since it was a DQ victory. But since Brock keeps the belt, I'm still right. 4-4

2012 Update: The match ended in a double-disqualification, leading to a rematch at Hell In A... er, I mean, No Mercy that Lesnar would win. The match both Brock and Taker would compete in? Hell In A Cell, back when the match meant something and wasn't used as a gimmick to sell PPVs.

4-4. Not a bad deal. Of course, the following month's PPV was better.

2012 Reflections on WWE Unforgiven 2002
The final moments of Unforgiven 2002 was the sorry main event and the stupidity of HLA teasing that resulted in the world baring witness to Rikishi in drag and blackface. Utterly, utterly ridiculous tripe that takes points off an otherwise solid PPV showing. Of course, the HLA stuff would be tame stuff compared to the horror that is Katie Vick... but that's another story.

It's hard for me to give proper reflections on this show because, again, it's been a good long while since I saw this show. I've seen some reviews say that it was a good show, so I may take their word for it, but other than that... I really can't say much.

660 - Power Rangers Retrospective Revisited #01 - Day Of The Dumpster

2012-01-25T11:02:00.002-05:00

If you've noticed I've posted a couple old wrestling PPV picks and added more modern/current reflections. The idea is sort of lifted from a gimmick Scott Keith did on his blog with a number of his older Smark rants, but it is something that I have done sporadically on the old DTM Blog since 2010... save for the reposting part of it. I figure, why not try the same thing with the old Power Ranger Retrospectives?

Back in 2007, I wrote some retrospective commentaries on various Power Rangers episodes from the first couple seasons. I kept up with these for about a couple years before dropping it for no reason other than lack of interest. Outside of one other retrospective done this past year, I haven't really done much of these and I'm really hoping to revive something by attempting a monthly update... which might seem a tad more manageable.

At the moment, I'll be uploading one of these older revists a week for the month of February.

The original text was written back on January 12, 2007 on the old DTM Blog (Post #412 if you're wondering) and subsequently reposted on this blog. Technically speaking, this would be the second time such a post is made, but there will be liner notes here and there from 2012. So enjoy.

On a previous blog post, I had mentioned something about doing commentaries on select Power Ranger episodes. The concept sort of stems from the fact that I'll be transfering some episodes I have on tape to DVD and it'd be interesting to have my thoughts on paper. So we'll start with the first episode of the original Mighty Morphin show, entitled "Day of the Dumpster". This is (hopefully) the first of many MMPR episodes that I'm going to comment on. Some of the episodes I remember off the back of my mind while others haven't been seen in ages, so we'll see which episodes hold and which don't.

(2012 Update: As it turned out, I've only done five of these retrospectives... and one was based on a two-parter from a then-more recent season.)

The show opens up with a quick montage of events yet to be scene: two unwitting American astronauts open an interstellar canister and release some of the most fiendish space aliens ever to exist. With a bold and terrifying declaration, the head sorceress declares her freedom after ten thousand years and that it's time to conquer the planet Earth. Meanwhile, on said planet Earth, we see a floating head materialize and ordering his robotic assistant, Alpha, to recruit a group of teenagers with attitudes to confront the recently freed sorceress named Rita.

This was the opening of the Power Rangers. What follows is the usual cast credits and a sampling of Japanese footage. Then the title logo is shown, looking much different from the logos featured on the toy packaging (someone has to explain that to me because I am at a loss). Then the show proper begins.

So to repeat, astronauts investigate a strange interstellar object. Proving that humans are the stupidest creatures in the universe, they open up the canister and unleash the evil space aliens and their leader Rita Repulsa, who then proceeds to destroy her prison and declare war on Earth. But you know something really troubling? You never really found out what happened to the two astronauts responsible for setting the world on its course by freeing Rita. In the original Japanese version, she blew them into deep space using her super breath. In the original pilot, she just blew them away. Here, they're sort of scared away and that's it.

Now we open the next scene with an overhead view of the Angel Grove Youth Center, which is one of the only three places that seem to exist in the fictitious city of Angel Grove. It is here where we get our first glimpse of the heroes to be, the teenagers with attitudes that will kick Rita Repulsa's ass to the next thousand years. They are:

Jason - Token karate man. Likes to wear red. As in red-blooded American male. Whatever.

Trini - Token Asian Kung fu chick. Likes to wear yellow. Racial overtones? Nah, I don't know what you're talking about.

Billy - Token nerd. Likes to wear blue and use huge words nobody short of another nerd (or Trini) would understand.

Kimberly - Token airhead. Likes to wear pink. (The whole irony of this? Amy Jo Johnson, the actress who played Kimberly, HATES pink).

Zack - Token black dude. Likes to wear black. No racial overtones here. Nope.

(2012 Update: I honestly think people were looking too much into these things. I'm sure they were given the roles because they were good for the parts, not because their skin matched the color of the suit. Let's try to remember one thing; Thuy Trang wasn't even the first person to play Trini, but rather a role she got after the original actress, Audri Dubois, left. Also, it amazes me that people would cry foul over Thuy Trang (an Asian) and Walter Jones (a black actor) getting the Yellow and Black suits respectively, and yet years later, nobody cried foul when Operation Overdrive (a series during the Disney ownership days, mind you) gave the Black suit to Samuel Benta... a black actor. Go figure.)

These are our teenagers with attitudes... sounds like they came out of Grease... or maybe Grease 2. Over time, as the show would progress, the kids would slowly develop into more fuller characters and people would have a reason to care about these people aside from the fact that they use the most generic form of martial arts to beat the crap out of rubber monsters. But for now, they're stereotypical prototypes; the easiest type of character to create and portray.

(2012 Update: Of course, as the series would progress, the characters would eventually grow out of the stereotypical archtypes and develop personalities; Billy becoming less nerdy, Kimberly breaking away from the valley girl mentality, that sort of thing. Would have been interesting to see how the characters of Zack and Trini would have progressed had the actors not left in mid-season 2, but that's besides the point.)

So they perform various stunts for a few seconds to show off to the kiddies and then we get introduced to the resident bullies, Bulk & Skull. Bulk & Skull are the comedy relief of Power Rangers and would be in that role for about six years before being eventually phased out. Whenever Bulk & Skull are nearby, slapstick hilarity ensures, whether it be attempting to replicate Jason's moves (poorly) or getting a bowl spinich juice in the face during an Earthquake. And speaking of earthquakes, enigmatic leader Zordon decides to summon five overbearing and overemotional teenagers to fight Rita... but Alpha plays it safe and gets the five kids mentioned above. I guess Bulk & Skull don't have the right builds to be swatted with Japanese stuntmen in colored costumes.

(2012 Update: And yet a 12-year-old kid did have the right build to grow into a suit? Go figure... By the way, watching the antics of Bulk & Spike makes me appreciate the antics of Bulk & Skull even more. Spike may be Skull's kid - please tell me how this happened - but he may never live up to the old man's legend.)

So more exposition is made: Zordon and Alpha detail the story of Rita's escape and her claims to domination. He then declare them Power Rangers and the new heroes scoff and leave. Grateful kids you picked there, Zordon. Maybe these kids do have attitude after all.

So as the kids walk back home in the middle of nowhere, some soul-searching and second guessing is discussed until Rita decides to shoot them from the moon. Of course, her aim is off and she hits a mountain instead which rattles the new Rangers. The teens are then faced against the Putty Patrols, whom look like stuntguys in poorly conceived costumes. Let's get off topic for a second: fans would complain about the Green Ranger's shield looking flimsy and cheap in American footage, but the true sign of cheapness comes in the early Putty costumes, where you can see the stunt actor's eyes through the costumes, while in the Japanese version, they have these red eye things. Now if they couldn't afford (or bothered) to spend money on red visors to cover two little holes on a Putty costume, what made you think they would spend money on making a durable shield for one of their more popular characters? But I digress.

(2012 Update: I would have been more picky about the blatant re-use of long shot footage from the old pilot than I would red lens on a Putty. It's one thing to have putties have red eye or not; it's another thing to have the protagonists switch clothes between cuts.)

So the Rangers fight the Putties and get their asses kicked. Billy is obviously the first to fall because HE TAKES OFF HIS GLASSES DURING THE MIDDLE OF A FIGHT. Yeah, Putties will wait for you to take off your glasses, man... (2012 Update: Give Billy some sliver of credit; he learned from this experience and eventually did ditch the glasses... a year later.) So finally, after a thorough whipping, Jason declares that they should use their shiny new morphers to morph into Power Rangers. And of course, the big moment is here: they call out their dinosaurs and are now wrapped in skin-tight multi-colored costumes... and the most astute observers will note that Trini is suddenly flat-chested in morphed state. The reason has been discussed many times before, and I just won't bother.

Alpha has an orgasm that they morphed and sends them to the city where Goldar and putties are threatening the citizens from the top of the building. So now, thanks to their morphed powers and Japanese footage, they fair much better. Rita goes nuts and throws her staff to the ground, which makes Goldar grow. The Rangers naturally respond by summoning their newly acquired zords and instantly know how to use them. After taking a couple shots, they form the Megazord and begin to get an upperhand on Goldar. After a while, Goldar goes away and Rita has the first of many headaches. Yay!

With their first victory, Zordon gives the new Rangers three rules: never use your power for personal gain, never escalate a battle unless circumstance calls for it, and do the secret identity thing. Breaking these rules results in the loss of their powers. (2012 Update: Rules are made to be broken, I suppose.) They agree and a legend is born. Show over.

2007 FINAL ANALYSIS: The first episode's purpose is to introduce the characters, set up the situation, and lay out the groundworks for future episodes of the show. While "Dumpster" isn't a good episode, it does serves this purpose quite well. Most early episodes of Power Rangers followed this format of cheap writing, but eventually as the show progressed, the writing would be improved somewhat and the stories told within would get more interesting in spite of the fact that they still revolved around everyplots. But for now, it's camp for the sake of camp and there are no major complaints.

(2012 Update: Not much to add on that count. Watched it recently on Netflix and I still feel more or less the same way I did back then. No need for a modern reflection on the episode; the above analysis nailed it for me.)

RATING: 3/5

659 - The SOPA Guy violates copyright

2012-01-21T12:01:00.002-05:00

Source article: http://www.thestatecolumn.com/articles/sopa-sponsor-rep-lamar-smith-may-have-violated-copyright/

Double standards indeed...

658 - Big Rigs... First Time Playing (Second Time Running)

2012-01-13T13:47:00.002-05:00

657 - WCW Announcers As Chimps? What?

2012-01-12T10:50:00.003-05:00

I'll say this, at least. Mike Tenay showed more emotion in this short clip than he did in his entire TNA stint... and that's the truly sad thing.

656 - Hiatus...

2012-01-09T14:02:00.000-05:00

Hiatus will probably affect blog updates as well, but there will be some reposting of old stuff here and there.

655 - WWE Summerslam 2002 - Old Predictions, Show Results, and Modern-Day Reflections

2012-01-08T14:57:00.000-05:00

Summerslam 2002 was the show that signaled the changing of the guard, as it would feature the end of the Rock's tenure as a regular WWE Superstar and the rise of Brock Lesnar as an unstoppable main event force in WWE... for about a couple years, at least. Not only that, but this was the show that brought Shawn Michaels back in the fold after four years of retirement... yeah, we'll see how long his second retirement lasts before he gets the itch to jump back in, but he seems to mean it this time... and it was on his terms... somewhat.

I recently got myself an copy of the show from one of my friends and gave it a watch for the first time in years. I enjoyed it for the most part. So yeah, here are my picks from 2002, the end results of the match, and some recent thoughts and reflections on the show.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio
2002 Pick: Let's face it. The prospect of a well-known lucha-style performer taking on an Olympic athlete is somewhat appealing... Kurt Angle will lose to the "12-year-old" as he puts it for the second time.

Winner: Kurt Angle claims the win over the 12-year-old... don't recall if they ever had a rubber match, but whatever. (0-1)

2012 Update: Amazingly, Rey Mysterio would eventually win the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania 22 in a Triple Threat match featuring Randy Orton. The champion at the time? Kurt Angle...

I thought the match was a nice opener... nothing amazing or anything, but they got a good match out of it and both looked good doing it. It actually felt like it could go either way; the same feeling I got when watching this for the first time in nine and a half years.

Ric Flair vs. Chris Jericho
2002 Pick: Jericho may very well prevail in this battle... not because he's king of the world, but because if he jobs, his match might get more negative reactions... then again, who cares?

Winner: Flair gets the duke... leaving me oh-for-two. (0-2)

2012 Update: I honestly didn't expect Flair to go over here and thought that they would just have him job to all the up-and-comers. It seemed amazing that at that point in his career, Ric Flair would be posed for a decent run, netting a couple titles along the way before his "first" retirement in 2008. Nowadays, whenever I see Ric Flair in the ring, I shake my head in sadness, wondering how far down his luck he must be to continue this charade. It's just depressing to watch.

Edge vs. Eddie Guerrero
2002 Pick: Edge will beat the Latino Mullet... who really cares?

Winner: Edge (1-2)

2012 Update: Hmm... funny thing I noticed about this match was that Edge apparently had a bad shoulder... and yet when he did the spear at the end, he did it with the bad shoulder... amazing that I noticed this, since minor details tend to go over my head. I wonder if this made Botchamania.

WWE Tag-Team ChampionshipLance Storm and Christian (c) vs. Booker T and Goldust
2002 Pick: The Book and the "Black-and-Gold Teletubby" take this match and the belts, SUCKA!

Winner: UnAmericans (Storm/Christian) retain the titles. (1-3)

2012 Update: I should probably not have bet against the UnAmericans... but then again, I didn't expect the team to last as long as they went, considering the supposed controversy surrounding that particular stable... the UnAmericans would eventually disband a month later, with only Lance Storm and William Regal continuing their Anti-American gimmicks while Test and Christian would go their separate ways.

WWE Intercontinental Championship
Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit (c)
2002 Pick: The Un-Americans... er, Canadians have a point... Canadian talent is underused... Benoit comes back from a fatal injury and all he gets is the IC title... Win, Chris! Win!

Winner: RVD retains... God damn. Not my night. (1-4)

2012 Update: At this point, the IC title meant so little that it was eventually merged with the World title a month later. It would eventually be resurrected mid-2003 where it continues to be defended and mean nothing today. Then again, NONE of the belts seem to have much value these days.

Undertaker vs. Test
2002 Pick: The battle of the big men. One is old and one is dull... I guess I'll have to go for the old one.

Winner: Undertaker a.k.a. the old one. (2-4)

2012 Update: Originally picked the dull one by mistake when I actually meant the old one. Nice to have that rectified. The only thing that couldn't be rectified was my pressing of the fast-forward button when re-watching this recently. In total honesty, I drifted off to la-la land when watching this... by the way, JR, it's nice that you're cheering Undertaker on in his victory, especially considering he shoved your face up Vinnie Mac's ass months ago. Boy, that Jim Ross. Such a forgiving guy!

Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels
2002 Pick: HBK will take the win... why do I say HBK? I dunno... by the way, WHAT THE F*** was that on RAW? I thought the guy was crippled! What the f*** was that?!

Winner: Shawn Michaels... obviously. (3-4)

2012 Update: Amazing how perspective works. Back then, I was amazed that HBK could move as well as he did for a one-time match despite a back injury that kept him off the shelf for four years... Little did we know that this would be the start of an incredible comeback for Shawn Michaels that would last several years. Hey, say what you will about the guy, but Shawn hadn't missed a beat during his comeback and just got better over the years until his eventually retirement in 2010. Absolutely amazing.

Also, it seems highly suspect that HHH would go out of his way to make HBK look good, and yet not do the same for the potential stars that he would have matches with later on. I'm sure that was a shrewd business decision and has no bearing on the fact that Hunter was wrestling one of his best buddies. Nope. Not like that at all.

Undisputed WWE Championship
The Rock (c) vs. Brock Lesnar
2002 Pick: Uh, a no-brainer! Brock wins the match and the belt because Rock is a crock.

Winner: Brock Lesnar wins... and sends the Rock to Hollywood. (4-4)

2012 Pick: Wow, I was being clever there... sarcasm aside, the match itself was surreal. Brock Lesnar was supposed to be the big bad heel in this match... and yet the crowd absolutely pissed all over the Rock because he was leaving. It's been said that the reaction to The Rock on a video clip was so fierce that he was HELD OFF TV for fears that the crowd would be more rabid. This, along with the match with Hogan at Mania X-8, would serve as the seeds for the Rock's 2003 heel run, which included a nice little feud with Hurricane and the first WWE match of Bill Goldberg.

But hey, give Rock credit. The guy was the biggest star that WWE had going for them and he was more than willing to let Brock beat the crap out of him in spectacular fashion in order to help build the Next Big Thing (no pun intended) and launch him into the upper echelon of the promotion. The guy did what was asked of him and did what was needed to get guys over... something that very few (if any) "big" superstars do in their later years without bitching, moaning, or politicking. (Hogan and Hunter says "Hi!")

Finally, credit due to Michael Cole and Taz. I believe this was their first PPV main event and boy, did they step up their game. Michael Cole circa 2002 certainly turned out to be a pretty competent commentator that, I believe, could have rivaled Jim Ross in terms of telling a story. A stretch, you say? Perhaps... but it is a far cry from the sad joke that Michael Cole has become today... all things considered.

2002 Pre-Show Thoughts
To tell you the truth, this is a pretty lousy card. I don't see anything really appealing to me that I may enjoy. On the other hand, the prospect of Angle losing to Reyrey is somewhat intriguing, but not by much... I'll still watch the show at my local bar.

2012 Reflections On WWE Summerslam 2002
I don't ever recall if I addressed this show afterwards, but I need to go back to 2002 and get myself brain surgery. Summerslam 2002 turned out to be a pretty memorable show and even watching today, I enjoyed watching the show tremendously because it was just a well-booked card for the most part. Although it saw the end of the Rock's regular stint in WWE, it brought Shawn Michaels back into the fold, where he would continue to wrestle top-notch match after top-notch match.

So like I said, I recently got my hands on the show and I gotta say, for the most part, it's still a pretty good show with a solid array of matches. The wrestling on this show was top-notch and seemed to outshine and even mute out the horribleness of the backstage skits between Stephanie and Uncle Eric. Undertaker/Test aside, I've enjoyed the show tremendous, I think it still holds up pretty well, and if you get a chance to get your hands on this, go for it.

654 - WWE Vengeance 2002 - Old Predictions, Results, and Modern-Day Musings

2012-01-06T12:46:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time, a long time ago, back in 2000, I did a quaint little website called DTM Webstation... it was online, but rarely untouched until about a couple years later when I had regular internet access. Around that time, I started doing a series of commentaries quaintly titled "The Bite." Essentially my own rambling blog before such blogging ease was available to the masses or at least any that I was remotely aware. The Bite commentaries covered whatever came to mind, but one of the things I did in those commentaries was do quick predictions for then-upcoming WWE PPV shows, from time to time. Once I started up the DTM Blog, those predictions became a regular feature and the Bite commentaries became... well, obsolete.

The first PPV that went under the prediction knife was the 2002 iteration of WWE's Vengeance PPV. The format from back then is quite different from what would eventually be used in more recent times, but I've been tweaking with the format a bit so that it's a bit more uniform when all of these things get reposted.

In any case, you'll find some predictions, the end result of each match, and some more recent reflections on my picks. I wouldn't consider these to be reviews of shows, because more often than note, some of these picks and results documents (especially the earlier and later ones) do not have any quick thoughts on the show. I'd consider adding them, but that would require that I still have the show in question... and most of the 2002-2003 stuff is scattered across the cosmos. Still, if I have a chance to check the shows out, I may update these posts with quick overall thoughts.

It should be noted that that results were added in later on when PPV picks spawned into their own section on the old DTM Webstation.

Tag-Team Tables Match:
Bubba Ray and Spike Dudley vs. Eddy Guerrero and Chris Benoit
2002 Pick: Guerrero and Benoit will probably get this victory...

Winners: Dudleyz (0-1)

2012 Update: The Dudleyz usually comprise Bubba Ray and D-Von, but at this point in time, D-Von was busy being a crooked reverand on Smackdown - they would eventually reunited at that year's Survivor Series.

Oh boy, what the heck was I thinking picking anyone other than the Dudleyz to win a tables match? Funny thing is; both losers would go on to be World champions in 2004... and subsequently die later on... actually, that's not so funny. I'm even sorry I brought it up.

WWE Cruiserweight Championship
Jamie Noble (c) vs. Billy Kidman
2002 Pick: Noble may retain his title tonight... only to be fodder for Rey Mysterio Jr. a couple weeks later.

Winner: Jame Noble retained his title. (1-1)

2012 Update: Kidman would eventually defeat Noble for the title in November, holding on to the title before dropping it to Matt Hardy, who would eventually drop the belt to Rey Mysterio (no Jr.) in June 2003... yes, kids. Matt Hardy was once light enough to hold the WWE's lightweight title. Hard to imagine these days.

WWE European Championship
William Regal (c) vs. Jeff Hardy
Winner: Jeff Hardy wins the title.

2012 Update: For some reason, there was no pick for this one. I can't recall why... It should be noted that some time after on RAW, Jeff Hardy would drop the Euro title over to then-IC Champion Rob Van Dam in a ladder match. Thus unifying the titles and retiring the Euro title for good.

Chris Jericho vs. John Cena
Winner: John Cena

2012 Update: Another match I did not choose a winner on. Probably a late addition or I simply forgot about this one. By the way, this was John Cena's PPV debut, a month before his actual debut in a match against Kurt Angle on Smackdown. I remember that match being pretty decent, with Cena actually looking strong and giving Angle a run for his money before succumbing to the former champion's technical prowess. Any way you look at it, it seemed pretty clear that the future was going to be pretty bright for John Cena (comprising a wide variety of day-glo colors.)

Too bad it had to be Jericho doing the deed... having gone from first-ever undisputed champion to cannon fodder for SuperCena.

WWE Intercontinental Championship
Rob Van Dam (c) vs. Brock Lesnar
2002 Pick: A no-brainer... Lesnar is going to win the title...

Winner: RVD retains the title by DQ. While a cop-out ending, it was the only way for RVD to keep the belt while protecting Brock, as a pinfall loss would have sabotaged his momentum going into Summerslam, so in a sense, it was a smart ending. That doesn't change the fact that I was wrong, so... (1-2)

2012 Update: It also wouldn't have made sense for Lesnar to win the title for no reason whatsoever, considering that it was a given that he would eventually claim the Undisputed WWE Championship at Summerslam... still, a TITLE for TITLE main event would have been neat to witness and it's not something we see often these days.

No-DQ Match:
Booker T vs. Big Show
2002 Pick: Tough one to call... Big Show would probably get the upper hand over the master of the spineroni.

Winner: Booker T (2-2)

2012 Update: Interesting thing to note here is that this match came about because Booker T was kicked out of the nWo version 297872.7728 pre-alpha whatever. Eventually, the nWo thing was dropped but they kept the feud because... they hate each other? Maybe? I may have to track this show down or something.

WWE Tag-Team Championship
Hulk Hogan and Edge (c) vs. Lance Storm and Christian
2002 Pick: The victory will go to the "Anti-American" team of Storm and Christian... although the gimmick has to go...

Winners: Storm and Christian won the titles, as predicted. The gimmick actually lasted a short while before all went their own separate ways and Storm/Regal would be a competent tag team in their own right. (3-2)

2012 Update: This would be the last time Hulk Hogan would make regular PPV appearances, as his 2002 nostalgia run (which began as an nWo run... again) came to an end when he was destroyed by Brock Lesnar in impressive fashion. Hogan would have brief runs here and there, but it was pretty clear even back then that his days as an active wrestler were numbered. Shame he never got the memo.

Triple-Threat Match for the Undisputed WWE Championship
The Rock vs. The Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle
2002 Pick: Blah... the Rock... because Undertaker is old and Kurt Angle is a bald dork...

Winner: As expected, the Rock won the title. But we all know that despite having laid claim to the former WWF championship an astounding seven times, he's only cannon fodder from Brock Lesnar, who would take the title a month later. (4-2)

2012 Update: John Cena would break that record, laying claim to the WWE Championship an absurd ten times. Of course, by this point, championships get bounced around like hot potatoes with reigns about as long as spring break, but still...

I recently found a video of this match floating around YouTube. It wasn't the full match, but from the near-eight minute clip, it looked like a pretty good match for the most part. Solid action, good commentary, a satisfying ending that wasn't predictable from the getgo, and an overall well-told story from three of the greats at the time. I definitely need to track this one down.

2012 Reflects on WWE Vengeance 2002
At the time of the PPV, the WWE Draft was only a couple months in effect and there had already been three PPVs on hand. All of those PPVs were called by Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler... who did RAW commentary. On Smackdown, Michael Cole and Taz(z) did commentary... so at the start of Vengeance, Cole and Taz confronted JR and King over this oversight. The result was that Cole and Taz got to call some matches and announcing duties would be split between the two pairs. It was a pretty significant step towards diversifying the two brands and no doubt had that confrontation not happened, Cole and Taz probably wouldn't have gotten a fair shake... nor would they have gotten a chance to call some main events. It's just too bad that in recent years, we've fallen back to one mishmash announcing team calling matches from both brands. Just sad.

Aside from the wrestling, there was an additional angle where Triple H was a free agent and had to choose between joining RAW (headed by then-General Manager Eric Bischoff) or Smackdown (headed by then-General Manager Nipple H). HHH eventually chose RAW, turned on HBK, and began his sickeningly boring reign on top, burying people that are more deserving of the spot than he. I remember it being a decent story at the time... even if it stemmed from another aborted nWo version whatever storyline.

I'm almost tempted to find a copy of this show, because reading the results (and my own pained comments), it seemed like a pretty solid show for the most part. Certainly says something when an older 2002 show that one barely remembers is more intriguing than the monthly crap that occurs in 2012. Nice.

653 - No More PPV Predictions... Just Musings

2012-01-03T12:56:00.000-05:00

So as one can tell, there hasn't been much in terms of PPV predictions. Let's be honest; I find it rather pointless to make predictions for shows that I have very little (if any) chance or desire to go out of my way to actually watch... and most of my PPV-related posts, as of late, have been more musings than actual picks. So as a result, I did away with the PPV Predictions label and replaced it with a brand-spanking new PPV Musings category.

Basically, I muse about PPVs, whether it'd be a wrestling PPV, MMA PPV, or whatever PPV comes to mind... but truthfully, this is more of an excuse to repost older PPV Predictions from long ago (dating back to 2002 during the Webstation days) and even add some recent reflections for some of these shows. Also, I may use this as an excuse to look back on past PPVs from ages ago. So there's more flexibility to the PPV Musings label than there with the old label... although god willing, I may post some picks for the heck of it...

So yeah... generic update for blog labels. Will probably upload the first "old" PPV Picks sheet as soon as I come across some.

652 - Netflix Canada gets Power Rangers... some of it.

2012-01-02T03:18:00.000-05:00

So a couple months ago, I signed up to Netflix and for the most part, I like what I see... however, I was a tad disappointed that there was no sign of Power Rangers on the Canadian side of things, since Netflix in the US has most, if not all, of the seasons on their side... Power Rangers on Netflix is the only reason why I bothered with the service to begin with... but at the very least, I'm getting some use from it. For example, they have the theatrical versions of the first and sixth Star Trek feature films, thus eliminating any need or urge to get the recent DVD compilations which contain these things. So I'm getting some use out of Netflix...

Then I fire up my new Western Digital TV Live Streaming device and enter Netflix and what do I find? A nice dose of Power Rangers... not all eighteen seasons, but the classic stuff; all of Mighty Morphin, the Alien Rangers storyarc, and all of Zeo. They also put the recent Samurai season, along with the three specials... which is good, since I now have the means to watch Samurai.

So yeah... thanks, Netflix Canada.

651 - Happy New Year. I'm Going To Bed. Good Night.

2012-01-01T14:22:00.002-05:00

650 - 2011 Year In Review

2011-12-31T08:00:00.000-05:00

Once again, another year comes to a close and an annual tradition at the Twisted Realms takes place; the dreaded Year In Review list. This list has me saying quite a bit for each of the winners, losers, and middle grounders of 2011. Perhaps moreso than any list prior. As such, there could be the possibility of being fewer entries than usual... then again, maybe not. Let's get going...

THE YEAR'S WINNERS
Some good stuff has happened to or involving these particular targets during 2009.

CM PUNK
I like CM Punk's work. His promos are top-notch stuff, his matches are fairly entertaining, and he has a unique look and presence that sets him apart from the rest of the bunch, all of whom seem to blend in rather easily. Unfortunately, CM Punk was always stuck at a certain point during his WWE run and was never allowed to run with the ball. One night in June changed all that when, Punk, one week after announcing that he would be leaving WWE with the champion, cut a promo with such brilliance, such truth, and such emotion that it did what nobody else in WWE or TNA had been able to do for years; make wrestling relevant. And while that relevancy lasted ever so briefly, CM Punk's stock had certainly risen to the point where he now enjoys a second WWE Championship reign... and had enough stroke to convince Vince to fork up the cash for "Cult of Personality." Kudos, Punk.

"MACHO MAN" RANDY SAVAGE
A great man was taken too soon when Randy Savage passed away from a massive heart attack in May. While it is a sad and tragic end to one of the greats in professional wrestling, Randy Savage's passing came about painlessly and without suffering or scrutiny in the aftermath. His death has touched so many people that many have said words in his honor, from fans to legends such as Warrior. Even Vince McMahon, a man who has had a rather turbulent relationship with Savage in recent years, paid tribute with a video package and a short written message in Time Magazine. I also did a little video tribute to the man back in May and so do so once again by including him on this list of winners of 2011. Godspeed, Macho Man. This Slim Jim's for you. Oooooohhhhh yeeeeeaaaahhhhHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

ADAM "EDGE" COPELAND
Even before the passing of the Macho Man, there was another individual to whom we had to say goodbye to... at least as an active competitor. Shortly after retaining the World Title against Alberto Del Rio at Wrestlemania XXVII (on the first match of the card, no less), Adam "Edge" Copeland had learned that he had suffered injuries so severe that he was forced to retire from in-ring action. This meant no more flash photography. No more live sex shows. No more missions against all things stupid. To a guy who lived the dream... thanks for the memories, dude. You shall be missed...

DC'S NEW 52
Somewhat of a risky proposition that DC attempted; relaunching their entire line of comics with the New 52. Some characters retain their histories (Batman, Green Lantern), while others are relaunched with new backstories (Superman being the most notable example). Although I haven't gotten around to reading all of these New 52 books, I did read some of them... and some of them turned out pretty good. Action Comics is a good read, Scott Snyder's Batman is good stuff, Green Lantern was pretty good, Swamp Thing was not bad for the couple issues I managed to catch, I'm really digging Batwoman... hell, even Batgirl with walking Barbara Gordon managed to keep me around so far. Sure, there are a few books I don't care for, but for the most part, this New 52 thing turned out to be a good thing. No real complaints here... well, there's one, but that's for much later.

MORTAL KOMBAT
2011 was the year that Mortal Kombat returned to its former glory. Not only did it get a top-notch fighter that almost (but not quite) returned the franchise to its bloody 2D roots, but there was also a separate web series that was also pretty slick. All in all, just another day in Goro's lair. At the very least, there won't be another MK vs. DCU game in the works.

1UP GAMER
1UP Gamer, a guy known for his Back To The Futer reviews that amused me with its poor quality yet humorous narrative that seemed to override the rather lackluster review segment, posted his most recent review for an unlocalized NES game called Spy Vs. Spy II. The review itself was a major step up from his early work, not to mention the narrative was pretty enjoyable too. Recently, he posted a vlog of all the shit he bought... holy shit, I'm hooked. And the sad thing is that it took me thing long to subscribe to the bastard. There... let's fix that.

JACK LAYTON
Another posthumous entry on the Winner's List, the late Jack Layton was enjoying a ride of success after leading his New Democrat party to Opposition to Harper's government - a feat that has landed him on this list. Whether you agreed with his policies and views or not, you had to admit that Mr. Layton had always brought a bit of showmanship and charisma to Canadian politics that has rarely been seen these days from other public figures. Not to mention that he always came off as a really nice guy that you'd want to have a drink or two with. There was only one Jack Layton and he shall be missed.

THE YEAR'S LOSERS
Quite a few losers this year...

WRESTLEMANIA XXVII
Anytime you watch a PPV event with a crowd, you're bound to have a good time regardless of the actual quality of the event. However, with Wrestlemania XXVII, even a crowded room couldn't save this show from being a colossal letdown in terms of value. While there were a couple of nice moments on the show (anything involving the Rock, I suppose), the show wasn't all that good. It's sad that the one match that I was looking forward to was bumped off the PPV in favor of Snooki, a boring HHH/Undertaker match that plodded at a snail's pace, and a sad end to a main event that ended up being the launching point for the build to Mania 28's main event of Cena/Rock. Wrestlemania 27 was a forgettable event... especially in hindsight when WWE would put out a normally-worthless PPV that ended up being one of the most hyped and dare I say BEST PPVs that company had put out.

And while we're at it...

WWE IN GENERAL
It never ceases to amaze me how a company could come up with such a hot angle that could revitalize interest in their product and then somehow manage to fuck it up so quickly. It happened with the Nexus storyline last year and it once again happened with the supposed "Summer of Punk." You had a guy who was catching on with the crowd and has managed to make your company and your form of entertainment actually fucking relevant to the masses beyond your short-sighted WWE universe, you had managed to make people hyped up for a show that usually means nothing, and on top of that, that PPV lived up to the hype with top-notch matches, solid wrestling, and a hot main event that ended the way it was supposed to. And you had a chance to take advantage of this newfound relevancy... and what do you do? You take the focus OFF the red-hot CM Punk and put it on insomnia-inducing HHH and his BFF Kevin Nash... and things went downhill from there. Sure, as of this writing, Punk is still champion and he's still up there, but this was such an easy opportunity for WWE to make it big and they just fucking blew it. Just sad.

CHYNA
Made a brief return to wrestling by joining TNA... only to unwittingly terminate that relationship by doing a porno movie. She would cry several times about not getting noticed by either WWE or TNA, but right now, I think they don't care for someone who went from first female Intercontinental champion to a pole dancer. And that's all I'm going to say at this point.

THE NEW SUPERMAN
As much as I enjoyed the new Action Comics, I equally LOATHE the new Superman. Never mind the fact that he's no longer married and that he seems less human due to the death of the Kents - I found him to be such a depressingly deplorable character that BATMAN comes off as a nicer guy in comparison. He seems almost broodish, the Harry Potter haircut is rather meh... I don't know, I'm just not liking this interpretation of the Man of Steel and am already anticipating the next big "reboot" that will probably happen when the creative braintrust at DC get bored with this one... give it a couple years at most.

MOTHERFUCKER MIKE MATEI
Yeah, I'm sure some folks are going to be upset by Mike Matei's inclusion on this list, but the truth is that I've had a hard time sitting through his series of Game Glitches videos. The idea is sound - albeit nothing new, as some glitches have been seen before elsewhere - but Mike's on-screen performance and voiceover is just irritating and lacks that presence that makes you want to come back for more if you weren't already a Cinemassacre supporter. Is it really necessary for him to act like Irate Gamer 2.0 during this videos? It'd be cool to see someone show off these glitches, but all I get from this series is a lite version of AVGN as portrayed by Mike Matei... and it's not a pretty picture.

AVGN'S 100TH EPISODE (a.k.a. ROB THE ROBOT)
I could go into a whole spiel as to why this is worse than getting your testicles dipped in acid, but quite frankly, I already did that... and you can read it here. I can only hope that this AVGN movie is nowhere near as embarrassing as this tripe.

HAROLD CAMPING
Former Family Radio personality who had predicted the end of the world to arrive twice; first on May 21st... and when that failed, again on October 21st. Suffice it to say that neither of Mr. Camping's predictions came true and thus he was forced to admit that he was wrong about discovering the means to pinpoint the exact time when the world would end. The really sad thing is that he could very well try the same shit again in a few years time and the ignorant fools will buy into his malarkey. Utterly sad.

THE MIDDLE GROUNDERS
Quite a few middle grounders here, for those who don't fit either mold.

TNA
TNA started off 2011 with an abysmal Immortal storyline that made me not care. They then had a PPV main event featuring a stoned-out Jeff Hardy being in no condition to perform. And while they claimed that Wrestling Matter, the shows didn't really reflect that tagline. However, after the Bound For Glory PPV, Impact slowly began to get a little bit better and did a better job in focusing on their own talent (instead of wasting time on folks like Chyna (who would rather do porn films and dance in strip bars than pursue a return to sports entertainment despite her claims to the contrary) in addition to placing a greater emphasis on the wrestling aspect of their product. 2011, for me, wasn't a great year for TNA, but at the very least, they're starting to build towards a hopefully better 2012... and that's enough to keep them in the middle, if nothing else. Could this lead to a topic change? Let's not go there, fella.

WONDER WOMAN
Biggest controversy came about when Wonder Woman was redesigned for JMS's new Odyssey storyline. End result was that she gained pants and a jacket. Fortunately, the story was pretty good, but before we could get a chance to discover this new Diana beyond the initial storyline, the New 52 came along and changed Wonder Woman into something I don't care for... oh yeah, did I mention her TV pilot was rejected? Yeah, lots of bad for Diana... but not enough to place her on the Loser's list.

STAR WARS BLU-RAY
Star Wars just hit Blu-Ray... and as is traditional whenever it hits a new format, a number of changes were made to the series as a whole. Some people didn't mind the changes, others were angry... I simply didn't care because I don't own Blu-Ray... so that's why it's in the middle pile.

And that's it for 2011. Happy 2012, everyone. BANG! BANG!

649 - WWE '12 (Wii) - First Impressions

2011-12-30T12:09:00.001-05:00

This should have been up shortly after the VLOG - Where's The WWE '12 Manual?" video came up, but things delayed it to now... so here it is...

2011 in Review and a final 2011 VLOG is coming tomorrow...

648 - Note To WWE... and Random Raw Thoughts

2011-12-28T12:33:00.001-05:00

Do us all a favor and stop showing up close-ups of the crowd. Every time someone shows up on screen, they look bored and want to be somewhere... ANYWHERE... else. It's really distracting and it takes away from a product that is incredibly diluted from Johnny Laryngitis' monotone performances... let's be honest; no matter how entertaining CM Punk's promo work happens to be, it'll always be cancelled out by Ace's muted and dull personality. Perhaps I'm missing something here, but whatever.

So Kane wants John Cena to embrace hate... presumably planting seeds to a heel turn that is never going to happen. Really, I have absolutely no faith in WWE pulling off a Cena heel turn. Never mind the fact that the company would fear such a turn costing them revenue - a Cena turn is something that is supposed to be a big deal and considering WWE's history with big deals in recent years, I'm pretty sure they'll do something incredible stupid to ruin that turn's potential, if any. Such a turn wouldn't work anyway because if he displayed one iota of villainy, the people booing him would actually cheer him on... because ANY shift in Cena's character would automatically make him a better character than what he's portraying now.

It seems particularly telling that when WWE starts milking the whole anti-Cena wave by releasing a T-Shirt, the crowd gives them the proverbial "fuck you" by not reacting to any of this crap going on. You could barely make out the dueling Cena chants at the end and when they pan to the crowd, the good majority of the people are doing fuck all. It seems pretty obvious now that WWE has no idea on how to tap into that sentiment in a way that would benefit them AND produce great product for the viewing audience; something that the old WWF was particularly skilled at with their storylines.

647 - Joust VGA (MS-DOS)

2011-12-27T10:59:00.002-05:00

Wasn't the review I intended on uploading, but since it was the only one ready, I figured... why not?

646 - Grumble, Grumble #18 - Sizzler07/ViB113 Double Feature

2011-12-26T22:20:00.001-05:00

Commentary - Sizzler07/ViB113 DOUBLE FEATURE by crisisded'

Yep, a little late to the party, but hell, why not?

645 - The May 21st Tetralogy - Archive Edition

2011-12-25T16:56:00.002-05:00

DTM Archive - May 21 Tetralogy by crisisded

All four May 21 videos under one handy-dandy video! Relive pure stupidity at its finest and most harmful.

644 - Dream-Gear 50-in-1 Plug-N-Play

2011-12-25T13:59:00.003-05:00

Took a while to put this altogether, but here are all five parts to the Dream-Gear 50-in-1 overview. Just use the button in the bottom to move on to the next chapter.

643 - Happy Holidays to all! Except my Internet Providers...

2011-12-25T12:41:00.001-05:00

Posted a couple of these bulletins on the channel, but here they are together for the sake of letting everyone else know. Happy Holidays...

Last night...
Left six videos to upload overnight, only to find out that only two went through. Internet woes on Christmas weekend... at least, the right two videos went up. But expect slow, cumbersome updates in the interim. Late night vlog may be posted late as well...

This morning...
Took down Part 5 of the Dream-Gear 50-in-1 overview so that I can re-upload it and have it appear AFTER Part 4 as opposed to before. It will be up eventually, but internet has been wonky as of late... Merry Christmas, everybody.

How it relates to this blog...

As soon as Part 5 is finished and I know about it, I will embed the playlist on the blog so you won't have to sort through the videos. I'm no longer dealing with multiple videos under the same blog post; if it's a multi-part session going up all at one... it'll be under a playlist.

642 - Colecovision!

2011-12-24T15:00:00.000-05:00

641 - 199 vs 40

2011-12-22T13:49:00.001-05:00

Source Article: http://www.rangercentral.com/index.php/2011/12/04/40-vs-199-may-2012/

Interesting premise they got going on there... the entirety of Super Sentai and the entirety of Kamen Riders in one film? Not quite sure how they're going to handle such a large cast of characters, but I can see why this might enticing to some folks.

Just remember, kids. Regardless of how good or how shitty it was in your mind, only one thing can be said with absolute truth...

Power Rangers did it first.

640 - Triple Digit Subs

2011-12-19T00:39:00.001-05:00

Pleasantly surprised to discover that the crisisded channel on YouTube has reached 101 subscribers this past weekend. Seems somewhat amazing to me that I'd get that much. Many thanks to those who took the time to watch this stuff I put... don't know if I'll do anything special, but... we'll see.

639 - "Two Indy schmucks didn't do so bad, Eh?"

2011-12-18T23:55:00.000-05:00

From CM Punk's Twitter:

Nice moment... I give it about two days.

638 - From First Female IC Champion To Club Stripper...

2011-12-18T18:34:00.000-05:00

Reading material:
http://www.wrestlenewz.com/wrestling/wwe-news/chyna-now-stripping-at-clubs-jim-ross-not-at-tlc-ppv-tonight/
http://www.wrestlenewz.com/wrestling/wwe-news/austin-to-star-in-maximum-conviction-chyna-performs-at-club/

And then she wonders why WWE and TNA are flat out ignoring her right now... still, as long as she enjoys doing this sort of thing, what does it matter?

637 - Christmas With Roddy Piper

2011-12-17T12:57:00.002-05:00

636

2011-12-17T01:21:00.003-05:00

"The worst thing I ever did?

Super Mario Bros.

It was a fuckin' nightmare.

The whole experience was a nightmare.

It had a husband-and-wife team directing,

whose arrogance had been mistaken for talent. After so many weeks, their own agent

told them to get off the set!

Fuckin' nightmare. Fuckin' idiots."

635

2011-12-16T15:05:00.000-05:00

This grave injustice cannot be tolerated! ACT NOW!

634 - DTM Archive: Initial FC3 Thoughts (before eventual purchase)

2011-12-16T13:50:00.000-05:00

Original Posting: December 8, 2008

DTM Blog Post #1057

Forgot I even did this; initial reactions to a preview video of the then-newest clone combo, the Yobo FC3 Plus. This was done before I even picked up the console for myself, so everything I wrote below is based mostly on speculation. If you want to check out an overview video that I did on the console a short while ago, just click here.

The above video brought to you by videogamecentral.com's Old Skool Fool

I've gotta admit. That thing looks ugly, but for what it does, I'd overlook the aestetics of the whole thing. I mean, come on. It plays NES, Super NES, and Genesis in one system. And if you have a Super Game Boy hanging around somewhere, that's FOUR different possible formats you can play on it. All things considered, it's a pretty neat little space saver.

I do have a couple minor concerns, though. One is the NES emulation and whether it'd be like all the other clone hacks (inferior sound quality, some color differences and other garbage issues) or whether it will be like the FC Twin's NES mode (accurate sound quality, some color differences, and noticable scanlines). In the case of the current Genesis/NES 2-in-1 clones and based on the few video reviews posted on these products, it seems like the NOAC is of a lower quality format. If the FC3's NOAC is based on the one that's on the FC Twin, then it might make it a bit better.

The other issue I have is the controller and this is more of a legit issue, as other video reviews of older GEN/NES clones confirmed that playing NES games with the way this thing is mapped is awkward. I can't really explain it properly without visual reference, but think of it as playing Mega Man Anniversary Collection on Gamecube... you know, with the A and B button roles reversed from what they originally did on the NES (similar to the included NES Metroid in the original Metroid Prime). Looks clearer, right?

Anyway... I'll wait and see with this one. Probably won't pick it up considering I already have a couple good clones and a perfectly functional Genesis laying around, but for those who don't, it's worth a look.

633 - DTM Archive: Quick DTM Blog Observations

2011-12-16T13:37:00.000-05:00

Every so often, I venture down the hallow halls of the original DTM Blog... and every so often, I'll post quick updates from current days. It's an interesting little side project that sometimes makes it worth revisiting the old site. Here are some quick examples and observations.

From Post #1089 - Final Crisis... bleh (Jan-15-2009)
SPOILER...

Batman dies... again.

END SPOILER...

There, I saved you 5 bucks.

(2011 Update: Actually, no. Batman just gets sent back in time, leaving Dick Grayson to be Batman... oh, does it really matter? Everything is going to get reset one way or another!!!)

From Post #1106 - RAW Punts (Feb-17-2009)
Randy Orton beats up Shane McMahon some more, RKOs Stephanie, and brings out Trips, who's irate dammit! What a heel that Orton is... not for systematically taking down McMahons, but for bringing Triple H back on RAW.

Aw man, this show is gonna suck again, isn't it?

(2011 Update: Funny how that works. Just this past summer, there was a pretty good story surrounding CM Punk and his then-expiring contract. On the guy's last night, he beat John Cena and walked out WWE Champion. WWE had people talking about their product, which had been made relevant once again... and then they decide to bring back Triple H and put the focus on him... and indeed, the show did start sucking again to the point where I'm barely watching the current Johnny Ace era of RAW.)

From Post #1113 - Don't Do It, Flair! (Mar-9-2009)
Ric Flair makes another appearance in distracting Chris Jericho. Please, Ric. STAY HOME! YOU'RE FUCKING RETIRED FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! STAY RETIRED!

(2011 Update: So much for that. Thank you, Mr. Bollea, for bringing Ric Flair back into active competition... that was sarcasm, by the way.)

632 - DTM Archive: An Underwhelming Effort, Sir

2011-12-16T12:53:00.000-05:00

Originally posted October 3, 2009
DTM Blog Post #1189

This was my thoughts on Chris "Irate Gamer" Bores' then-latest entry into his long-running (read: takes forever for him to put out) History Of Video Games series. Note the part at the end where I'd say that I'd ignore him to the foreseeable future and think about how long that stuck... not that long, I'm afraid.

No break, this time. It's not that long of a piece anyway.

So the Irate Gamer, after months of delay due to hard drive failures and other excuses, has finally uploaded the second part of his "History of video Games" series... which is just a review of the Magnavox Odyssey... and it's supposedly split into two parts. Now I've seen the episode and... yes, it seems like I'm falling asleep.
You know what? I try to give the guy a chance. I really do. Despite all the bad rap he gets, I figure I give him a chance and hope he somehow redeems himself. Sure, people call him a knock-off and a plagiarist... and sure, he gets a good chunk of his information wrong, but even after all that, I was willing to give him a chance in hopes that maybe, just maybe he'd produce a product that goes beyond the usual sloppy servings he had uploaded as of late.

Guess what? It hasn't happened.

Maybe it's just me... but isn't the point of a "History Of..." to touch on important events in a timely manner? I'd figure it'd be the best thing to do and easy to mock up. So why am I getting reviews of Space War (not even the actual version, but a random Flash version) and Computer Space when they should just be significant footnotes in the story? Why am I getting a review of the Magnavox Odyssey when it's supposed to be a historical retrospect? And why, for the love of God, are we getting TWO PARTS of this?! Just discuss the console a bit and move on! This is supposed to be a HISTORY RETROSPECT!

It should be noted that the Angry Video Game Nerd already did a review (2011 Update: more of a general overview than a review) of the Magnavox Odyssey and he only took ten minutes to review most of the necessary components outside of the light gun, which he demonstrated its use by shooting at the TV. Now there's probably more to the Odyssey than that, but the Nerd's review was advertised as that... a review. (2011 Update: again, more of an overview than a review... and I could have done without the stupid Nerd Terd or whatever it's supposed to be called.)

Now, I'm not going to declare myself a hater or anything like that - but I am simply going to ignore the man for the foreseeable future. Until he can produce something that is actually worth my time, I'm not going to bother anymore. (2011 Update: said ignoring was ignored.)

Sorry, Chris. But you fail.

(2011 Update: To be fair, later installments did drop the "review" format and just go through various items and games quickly... the accuracy of the information is questionable, but this series is mostly harmless and if anything, has sometimes inspired me to look up some of the historical points online.)

631 - The Yobo FC Twin - A Compiled Tribute

2011-12-16T12:40:00.000-05:00

The Yobo FC Twin was one of the earlier 2-in-1 clone consoles released in the mid-2000s. Essentially a combo NES/SNES clone system, it was a step up on prior NES clones with improved NES cloning and somewhat better quality. But the reason for this tribute is simple - it was the console that got me back into classic gaming when I first picked one up back in October 2007 and the console that I frequently play today - and it still works wonders, meaning I've been rather fortunate.

Just to give you some sense of context when reading this, the following tribute was originally written/compiled back in November 2009 - a short two years after my initial purchase of the system - and it still holds up rather well - although I have made some tweaks and updates to the included incompatibility list. I'll probably do a video overview in the near future, but right now, here's a shitload of text regarding the wonder machine that brought me back into the fold and started me off on a journey of personal enlightenment. Enjoy.

From the Oct. 14, 2007 Bite commentary:
Picked up an FC Twin this past week. For those wondering, it's a third-party console that plays your old NES and Super NES games. Although I can't speak for the SNES compatibility yet, I can tell you that NES games work fairly well. I say fairly because the sound is off in some games (most notably the SMB games). It looks well-built and sturdy too. If you need to find a replacement console and can't find a new system, this is a close alternative.

From the Oct. 21, 2007 Bite commentary:
Last week, I had mentioned that I had picked up a sleek FC Twin console, which allows you to play all your old NES and Super NES game cartridges. I already stated how I felt about the NES functionality on last week's commentary, but having sold off my old SNES along with games (but no controllers - so the joke's on the bastard who bought it and swindled me) years ago, I had no SNES games to test the system. So I picked up a couple SNES games a week later (Super Mario World and Super Castlevania IV - amazing that I found the 'Vania game). Anxious to try out my new purchases, I head home and plug up my FC Twin, slapped in 'Vania IV into the SNES slot and turned on the console to the 16-bit position.

Nothing.

So I blew the cartridge and tried it again. Nothing. Blew the connectors in the console. Nothing.

Then I looked at the console itself and noticed that the green light (which indicated the 16-bit mode is active) doesn't turn on. The 8-bit light (red light) turns on and the games work, but the green light doesn't. It was then I realized that my spanking new console was defective. Funny how this works, because this was something I've never heard happen when reading up on the console.

So this past Wednesday, I brought it back to the shop I bought it from and explained my plight. The shopkepper's (a different one from the guy who sold me the unit) first reply was "Did you blow the cartridge?" Blow the cart, you say? Why, that's a WONDERFUL idea! I never knew that in order to get the green light to work, I needed to simply blow the cart. Unfortunately for the genius, I told him I did, but the light didn't come on. Fortunately, I got my replacement unit... along with a used copy of Wing Commander. Now I got a fully functional FC Twin with both NES and SNES slots working fine. From what I can tell, SNES games run fine here without much problem. Wing Commander played pretty smoothly despite my initial fears that it would run slow due to the crappy intro (which tries to recreate what was done on the PC but fails miserably) and I am able to play Castlevania IV on a TV screen. Yay. Now I'm truly satisfied with my purchase. I'll probably post a review of the console in the near future.

The Written Review, From DTM Blog #1200 (November 3, 2009)

A long time ago in a galaxy two feet away, in the days before there was Blu-Ray this and HD that, the purpose of a video game console was to play video games. Nothing more, nothing less. It didn't play movies or music; it played video games. It didn't need a fancy set-up like a hi-def television or Internet connection; all you need was a TV, a wall outlet to plug the power in, a working controller, and a game cartridge. This was the gaming life. But then they introduced CDs to the mix and the multimedia revolution began its course; turning what were simple games with deep gameplay and fun into beautiful eye-candy with little to no substance... and no, fifteen-minute long unskippable cutscenes are not my idea of substance. Soon, video game hardware developers attempted to turn simple video game machines into second-rate computer systems that can play CD music, DVD movies, browse the Internet, and even watch porn... wow, it's just like using a computer, except on a computer, these are standard features that serve somewhat of a purpose while on game consoles, they are tacked on extras so developers could bump up the prices.

Maybe I should just review the damn console before this turns into a rant on the current gaming scene... although that's not a bad idea.

To relive the old days of gaming, we have game compilations on CD/DVD, X-Box Live Arcade, Wii's Virtual Console service, and even entire websites offering game downloads for a reasonable fee. However, for those of us who still have those old cartridges, we have to find vintage working consoles to play the classic we already own. Those that work cost an arm and leg and the dirt cheap ones are likely not to work. There is the option of repairing your faulty console, but if you're like me, chances are you're not much of an expert in taking things apart and putting them back together in the same shape it was before. Fortunately, we have third-party alternatives as a group of Asian developers have made a bunch of clone consoles. One of them is a 2-in-1 clone console called the FC Twin, developed by Yobo. This console is a follow-up to their NeoFami/FC Game console which was basically a NES clone system.

THE GOOD: Probably the FC Twin's best feature over other Fami-clones (at the time of its initial release, there were only NES clone systems) is its ability to play classic NES (8-bit) or Super NES (16-bit) games on the same console. The NES side of the unit actually plays fairly good and sounds fairly accurate compared to original hardware (read: SMB plays sound just as you remember them), although there might be a hiccup or two. But for the most part, sound is crisp and clear; something that seems to be an issue with the Retro Duo, a later 2-in-1 clone system with better compatibility, but weird sound issues with certain NES games.

SNES gameplay is also exceptional, with every pixel, soundbyte, and control movement almost perfectly replicated. Some games might cause some glitching when playing on the system, but those are few and between.

The console itself looks to be fairly well-built (albeit a little lightweight) and the controllers aren't too bad either. They function a little stiff for my tastes, but nonetheless, they are a pretty good reproduction of the SNES controller, which is quite possibly one of the best controllers I've ever laid my hands on. For $70 Canadian, I found it to be a steep but fair price, considering what I was getting; a dual NES/Super NES console that requires one plug and one set of A/V wiring.

THE BAD: It's been stated that certain games won't work with the console due to special chips and designs in these games and this is somewhat true. Castlevania III on the NES side of things is a perfect example, as the game would just halt before any gameplay would take place. Earlier models of the FC Twin would have some sound issues on the NES side, but later FC Twin models seemed to have rectified this issue, but some minor flaws in the emulation do exist.

Also, the FC Twin only outputs in composite. The Retro Duo does have S-video support. Just thought I throw that out there.

Another discerning criticism (and one that is used often against the FC Twin) is the exclusive use of SNES controller ports. While you can use your SNES gear without fault, this means no slots to use classic NES gear such as the Zapper or Power Glove. Whether this is a big loss is dependent on whether you actually need a dose of Duck Hunt or Gyromite in your life... although Yobo did release a light gun specifically for the FC Twin, so that seems to elevate some of the sorrow.

Finally, as a personal peeve, the included controllers have really short wires, so you'll probably want to dump those for actual SNES controllers with longer wires (or even no wires) fairly quickly.

OVERALL: The FC Twin is a very nice, affordable, and space-saving alternative to the NES and Super NES in a time when both consoles can be hard to come by in a functional (read: either with working pin connectors or not turning piss yellow) state. While the lack of compatibility for select titles will scare a few folks away, I wouldn't mind sacrificing a few games for something as sweet as this. It's certainly easier than to take your old NES apart and replacing the connectors unless you're a soldering saavy person, in which case you wouldn't be reading this review and started ordering the required pieces.

In any case, if you're looking to replay some classic games of an era long gone and are hard-pressed to find original hardware that still works - not to mention save a bit of space in the process - the FC Twin is your best bet.

NES Incompatible Game List

The following list is based off the Wikipedia list posted in December 2011 - significantly updated from the iniitial 2009 list. Some notes are from Wikipedia, while others are my own observations since I have a few of the games listed. Some games have additional comments based on either third-part sources (Wiki, for example) or from first-hand experience.

Any game requiring the Power Pad accessory is incompatible with the FC Twin as it cannot be used on this system. The following games are such Power Pad games.
- Athletic World
- Dance Aerobics
- Short Order Eggsplode
- Stadium Events
- Street Cop
- World Class Track Meet

AfterBurner

Bandit Kings of Ancient China

Battletoads
*The game hangs at the second level, however, if warps are used, this is passable and the rest of the game works perfect.

Captain Planet and the Planeteers
*The game will boot up but won't recognize any of the controller inputs. This tends to be an issue with most Mindscape games.

Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse
*The game freezes after inputting a password or the opening intro sequence - basically any point before gameplay. The game does work on the Retro Duo and FC Mobile II systems.

Cheetahmen II
*Why would you want to play this in the first place?

Challenge of the Dragon

Crystal Mines

Dirty Harry: The War Against Drugs

Dragon Warrior II
*While Wikipedia lists this as an incompatible game, my copy of the game works fine. It might be possible some versions of the game don't work.

Ducktales
*Wikipedia states that while the game does work, but it won't respond to the B button. However, my copy of the game responds to the B button just fine.

Gauntlet (Tengen version)
*Some older sources suggested that Tengen cartridges in general are not compatible with the FC Twin, but the Tengen cartridges I do have (Tetris, Rolling Thunder, Pac-Mania, and Ms. Pac-Man) work without a hitch.

Gauntlet II (?)
*I've heard some accounts say the game works, but I've had the same problem here as I did with Captain Planet. It's been a while since I last played it, so I may have to retest. Hence the (?).

Gemfire

Gyromite (kinda)
*The game normally requires the Robotic Operating Buddy accessory to play normally and that accessory reportedly (read: I wouldn't know from personal experience) can't be used with the FC Twin. However, since most of R.O.B.'s functionality involves pressing buttons on the second controller, you can have a second player substitute for the robot and loads of fun can be had there without issue. The same cannot be said for Stack-Up, which makes use of R.O.B. exclusively.

Laser Invasion

L'Empereur

Mad Max

Miracle Piano Teaching System
*The piano accessory cannot be used on the FC Twin... so yeah.

Paperboy

Pipe Mania

Quattro Arcade

Rad Racer II

Stack Up
*The Robotic Operating Buddy reportedly cannot be used with FC Twin.

The Krion Conquest (?)
*Some people claim that Krion Conquest doesn't work on FC Twin, but I personally tested the game on my FC Twin and can say that it works fine. In fact, I posted a video demonstrating this gameplay (on one hand). Again, it's entirely possible that some copies might not work, but my copy works fine.

The Last Starfighter
*Like Captain Planet, The game will boot up but won't recognize any of the controller inputs.

Uncharted Waters

As a sidenote, Wikipedia claims that certain copies of Dragon Warrior and Super Mario Bros. 2 won't function with the FC Twin, but my copies of both games seem to work fine without issues. The Wikipedia list also lists Dragon Warrior II as an incompatible game, but again, I tested the game personally and it works just fine. Hence, why it's not on my list.

SNES Incompatible Game List

The following list is based off the Wikipedia list posted in December 2011 - significantly updated from the iniitial 2009 list. Some notes are from Wikipedia, while others are my own observations since I have a few of the games listed. Some games have additional comments based on either third-part sources (Wiki, for example) or from first-hand experience.

As an additional note, the FC Twin does play Super Famicom games, but require circumvention of the plastic tabs within the SNES slot (either an adaptor or ripping the tabs off).

BatterUP

Contra III: The Alien Wars
*For some reason, walking under bridges in Stage 2 doesn't obscure the sprite from sight. The game works fine otherwise.

Doraemon - Nobita to Yosei no Kuni
*According to Wikipedia, the game's overworld map will not display, leaving only sprites on screen.

Dragon Quest I & II

Dragon Quest III

Front Mission: Gun Hazzard

Kirby's Dream Land

Kirby Super Star
*Both Kirby games apparently require the Nintendo SA-1 Chip to function... this is in dispute. Even on Wikipedia. Go figure.

Star Ocean
*The S-DD1 chip does not function.

Street Fghter Alpha 2
*According to Wikipedia, the game is incompatible due to the lack of the S-DD1 chip... HOWEVER, I personally tested the game myself and can say that my copy works fine on the FC Twin. It doesn't work on the Retro Duo for some reason.

Stunt Race FX
*Wikipedia states that Stunt Race FX is incompatible with the FC Twin due to the Super FX chip. While I do not have a copy of Stunt Race FX on hand - nor do I ever plan on it - I do have copies of Star Fox and Doom, both of which use the Super FX chip. And they work just fine. The more likely reason would probably be due to the S-DD1 chip.

Super Empire Strikes Back
*While the game works, there are issues. During the battle of Hoth mission, the ground texture goes "missing" and results in a battle over "black snow".

Super Ghouls 'n Ghosts
*Everything works up until the 3rd level boss which is incorrectly invisible.

Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars
*Due to Nintendo SA-1 Coprocessor built (disputed) into the Cartridge. My copy won't work on FC Twin, but works fine on the Retro Duo.

Super Turrican 2
*Certain bosses display incorrectly with messed-up colors, but the game plays fairly well otherwise.

Terranigma
*The game has a special lockout chip which prevents use on famiclones.

Tiny Toon Adventures: Buster Busts Loose
*Part of the title screen is discolored, but the game plays fine.

Winter Gold

630 - The Vaguest Plug Evah

2011-12-16T10:44:00.001-05:00

Next Friday - coincidentally the day preceding Christmas weekend - I'll be posting two commentary videos on two respective "reviews" from two rather dubious "reviewer" personalities. Here's the kicker; one will be for the DailyMotion account (for obvious reasons that become apparent once you watch it) and another for the YouTube crowd. It's been a while since I did that kind of commentary (aside from a couple unreleased tracks) and it's probably going to be somewhat different from what was done before, since the subject matter is somewhat... well, wait and see.

I thought of posting a video update on both channels, but figure that this would be much quicker. Meanwhile, I'm working on getting some videos together, including that Pac-Man Collection (7800) review that was promised a couple vlogs ago. That may be up either this week or next.

629

2011-12-13T13:57:00.001-05:00

From Brodus Clay's Twitter...

UPDATE: They found him on Planet Funk... best thing that could have happened to him, quite honestly. He looks happy too and got some sweet moves. Good boy, Brodus.

628 - Masked Kane... Uh-huh...

2011-12-13T09:51:00.003-05:00

Don't care about the Slammy Awards... but a couple noteworthy moments on last night's RAW.

- Jim Ross attempting to rap is pretty funny... too bad he didn't go by this one.

- CM Punk with the Johnny Ace mannequin is also pretty funny; video was a nice "touch"... if only they could have pulled Shane Douglas out of mothballs somehow, we'd have a Dynamic Dudes reunion. I don't know anybody who doesn't want that to happen! MAKE IT HAPPEN.*

- Somehow Masked Kane looks even uglier than Unmasked Kane. Kinda like the Vader-like helmet mask, though. Hope he keeps that around.

That's all I got.

*Nobody cares about the Dynamic Dudes.

627 - DTM Archive: 2010 In Review

2011-12-13T02:17:00.001-05:00

(A repost of last year's post on this blog... nothing's been changed except for the usual 2011 updates that have been made recently. I expect the 2011 in Review posting to be done on Christmas.)

Back on the old DTM Blog, I used to do a quick lookback on a year, primarily some of the highpoints and lowpoints that were worth my attention during the past year. Now we’re slowly approaching 2011 and thus it’s time to look back on some winners and losers of 2010.

2010 has been a relatively crummy year for me personally; I spent the better part of it looking for work after getting laid off from my old job. And for the most part, spent months doing nothing at home until a couple months ago where I got another job… which is actually less than stellar, but I guess I should be glad to have any work at all. In any case, not the best year for me.

But while things may have been on the low end of things personally-speaking, I can take solace in the fact that I’ve got family, I’ve got health, and I’m not as far as I could have been. So I suppose I can’t complain too much.

But that would defeat the purpose of this listing. So let’s begin, shall we?

THE WINNERS OF 2010
Not a particularly huge list of winners, but perhaps that’s for the best.

OLD WORKPLACE: More of a personal addition than anything else. Although I won't mention the company's name here, I believe they know who they are. While we may have parted ways, the 3+ years spent there were the best I've ever had, with wonderful people and a great learning experience. Best of luck to you guys.

BRET HART: Returned to WWE for the first time in years to blast Vinnie-Mac with a chair and win another U.S. championship… in Canada, no less… after his nephews did all the work on the Miz who would then win the WWE Championship in November. Why did I put Bret here again?

DANIEL BRYAN DANIELSON: Only reason he's on this list is because he choked an announcer and got fired for it. Also, he did this.

HAIM SABAN: Once upon a time, this man conceived Power Rangers. Then one day, he sold Power Rangers. Then one day again, he bought back Power Rangers and is funding a new season to air in 2011. We salute you, Mr. Saban. We salute you… actually, to be quite honest with you, I don’t honestly know why you’re added to this list since all you did this year was buy the franchise back and released a cheap-ass DVD to Comicon that featured one whole episode on a disc… but hey, getting something off the hands of the Mickey Mouse Club is more than enough for me, so kudos. Website’s cool, too. I guess.

TATSUNOKO VS. CAPCOM: What was initially a pipe dream to get localized in 2008 eventually became a reality in 2010, as Capcom characters take on the Tatsunoko characters in this Cross Generation of Ultimate All-Stars. Tatsunoko vs. Capcom is a top-notch, downright awesome fighting game on the Wii that more than makes up for the lack of Street Fighter IV on that console… although to be honest, I prefer TvC over SF4. TvC offers something new, while SF4 is just SF2… but in TWO POINT FIVE DEE. The fact that the upcoming Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 is sharing the same command scheme ought to tell you something about the effectiveness of the gameplay here. In any case, if you have a Wii, like fighters, and haven’t played this yet, what’s wrong with you?

IRON MAN 2: Solid movie and a solid sequel. Not much more to add to it than that.

MEGA MAN 10: A slightly tougher game, more strategic weapons, immediately-playable Proto Man, downloadable Bass, kick-ass soundtrack, and a presumed link to the Mega Man X origins in the form of the Roboenza virus. Is it wrong to say I prefer this game over Mega Man 9? Probably not. That, and the inclusion of downloadable stages based on the Game Boy titles makes it a sweeter package.

BUSY STREET: I’ve been a regular visitor to this site since its inception early on and I really enjoy some of their stuff. While the opinions and articles might not be popular ones among certain fanbases (and some would say their operations would be "trolling" in nature), they can be quite entertaining if you possess an open mind. Their review/commentary on Kickassia is a particularly funny piece.

(2011 Update: The site/blog has since been set to private... don't know why.)

THE LOSERS OF 2010
The stinking piles of dog manure. Unfortunately, I found it easier to find more losers than winners.

ANGRY JOE: Now here’s a guy whose “popularity” is a complete and utter mystery to me, because he doesn’t look like anybody interesting – just some doofus with a greenscreen. To be fair, I checked out a couple of his vids and got nothing out of it. He sounds annoying, he’s not remotely funny, and for a guy who calls himself “Angry” Joe, he doesn’t seem all that angry. But the real reason he’s on the losers list (and pretty much the ONLY reason I even bother to bring up his name) is because of his embarrassing, horrifically-painful-to-watch interview with Geoff Keighley on the carpet of the 2010 Spike Video Games Awards show. Look, if I have to make a whole video log rambling about this stupidity, then yeah, that makes the top of the loser list.

(2011 Update: Did Joe ever make it to this year's VGA show? I haven't anything from his camp regarding this... if not, it was probably for the best that he didn't go.)

Speaking of which…

THAT GUY WITH THE GLASSES: The entire crew is responsible for the two-hour borefest known as Kickassia, which did everything it could NOT to kick ass. Now I already did both a text review (on my blog) and a video review (just recently listed on the YT channel after having been exclusive to the Blog). And if that wasn’t enough to expose the world to their “acting”, there’s also a Christmas special where Nostalgia Critic looks at the lives of his fellow TGWTG cohorts if he had never existed. Just terrible all-around, although the special is only SLIGHTLY better because they didn’t put that on DVD… yet.

(2011 Update: Looking back, I'd say the Christmas special is marginally tolerable at best. Yeah, it's still pretty stupid, but honestly, it's the kind of thing that they SHOULD be doing, instead of attempting "epics" that they neither have the ability or the resources to fully realize... Suburban Knights, the 3rd Anniversary project, was somewhat better, but not by much.)

SPOONY'S WRESTLE WRESTLE: You know, when I go to a wrestling site, I expect to read or watch stuff relating to wrestling. I don't care for your buddies' football podcast or the MMA posts unless it involves Brock Lesnar or another former rassler in the sport. Not to mention the damned site doesn't get any updates anymore. Did Spoony ever say why he needed a second website if he was barely going to touch it? No? Okay, just checking.

(2011 Update: The site only has a couple updates at most during the better part of 2011... sometimes, it amazes me that the site is still around.)

SPOONY'S FINAL FANTASY X FINALE: Late addition, but it was posted on New Years' Eve and after having watched it, I can only come up with three words...

FUCK THIS SHIT!

Yeah, that sums it up right.

(2011 Update: Wow... three LOSER votes for TGWTG? Must have been something in my coffee that day.)

TIGER WOODS: Yeah, I think we all know why he’s here. Not a good year for the Wood.

TNA WRESTLING: Signed Hulk Hogan to run the company and subsequently made a ton of stupid decisions such as a pre-mature attempt to re-kindle a new Monday Night War, feuds over WWE Hall of Fame rings rather than TNA World Titles, allowing Lacey Von Erich to wrestle on a regular basis, and giving Jeff Hardy a World Title that resembles the Divas World title. I could keep going all night, but I have to go to bed soon.

NEXUS: What started off as a hot storyline quickly suffered a pain downfall to the point where it became a joke. Perhaps that’s the sad thing about Nexus; it started off with a lot of potential, kicking off with an awesome beatdown of the ring area, resulting in one guy getting fired for tie choking. Let’s face it; once John Cena overcame the odds (TM) at Summerslam, there was no fire in Nexus to burn bright, but rather a bloated bag of air that’s running on auto-pilot despite having crashed and burned ten times over. Will CM Punk’s involvement in Nexus improve the group? Probably not. I think it’s time we killed the pet project and be done with it.

STREET FIGHTER 2010: THE FINAL FIGHT: Everything about that game is a lie. Forget its relatively questionable links to the Street Fighter series that has come after this game’s inception; do we have cyboplasm, interstellar travel, and aliens visiting our worlds? No… we don’t. What a bunch of bullshit. Don’t trust science fiction to determine our future – they’re a bunch of liars!

That’s all I got this year. Happy 2011, everybody.

626 - Choplifter!

2011-12-11T19:15:00.001-05:00

Cue triumphant intro music...

625 - Oh dear...

2011-12-10T10:50:00.001-05:00

http://www.wrestlenewz.com/wrestling/wwe-news/former-wwe-diva-lita-arrested/

I guess that the depression of witnessing your former boyfriend running over your cardboard cutout with his car finally got to her. At least her mugshot isn't as bad as Matt's. Oh well...

624 - Sample Preview...

2011-12-09T12:52:00.000-05:00

Presently working on a potential MMPR fanfic project that is slated to run throughout 2012 if all goes according to plan. The basis of this project, not immediately evident from the sample preview, is a continuation of the 2010 reversioning of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers' first season. A soft reboot, if you will. We're hoping to get this off the ground in January. In the meantime, here's a sample preview of the first episode "The Green Flame."

He kept running in the fields, away from the shadow that pursued him. It is against his nature to flee from battle, but at this point, he has no other choice but to run. His strength has diminished, his body wounded from fierce combat, and the only thing keeping him in action is one last rush of adrenaline... the only thing that he has left... and even that wasn't enough to escape the clutches of the shadow... whose great speed and power slowly closed the gap... as they ran across an endless field with the blood of those who have given their lives.

Eventually, the shadow manages to take him down with an energy bolt and he soon tumbles to the ground. All pretense of strength gone, he lies on the ground for mere moments before slowly lifting himself to his knees. It is here where he fully absorbs his surroundings...

A great battle fought between an evil being and the forces of good...

A battle that ended bitterly, as evident by the piles of bodies scattered across the field...

The bodies of his friends and partners... all lifeless corpses who have fallen before evil incarnate.

As he stood motionless overseeing the carnage before him, the pursuing shadow grew closer, quickly gaining ground. He barely had a moment to turn and wince before the shadow leaped forward and...

...and suddenly Thomas "Tommy" Oliver sprung up in a sweat, breathing heavily. He surveyed his surroundings for a moment and found himself in his bedroom, immersed in darkness, with the moon outside the window providing what little illumination entered the room. He had woken up from a dream... or rather, a nightmare. One that was more intense than any he had experienced before... was it more than that? He wouldn't know...

Shaking his head, Tommy pushed the coverings aside and slipped out of the bed. He slowly walked around to gain his bearings while silking back his hair. He then stood towards the window and looked outdoors. It was dark out, with few houses lit up around the block. Just as he had expected.

Slowly, he laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Eventually, he would fall asleep... but not without wondering about the nightmare he had experienced. As consciousness slowly faded from his being, he wondered whether it was a nasty nightmare... or a sign of things to come...

One thing is certain... he won't let that get in the way of tomorrow...

623 - FC3 Plus

2011-12-04T00:15:00.001-05:00

622 - Chris Benoit Biopic To Be Filmed 2012

2011-12-03T12:01:00.001-05:00

Source Article: http://www.wrestlenewz.com/wrestling/wwe-news/chris-benoit-biopic-to-be-filmed-in-2012/

So, if you can't be bothered to read the article linked above, basically this film company, SRG Films, is gearing up to produce a biopic on Chris Benoit, the former WWE world champion whose career and legacy was forever tarnished by the Benoit murder-suicide thing that made the headlines in 2007 and put the entire wrestling industry under one gigantic microscope. One interesting note about this biopic, set to start shooting in the fall of 2012 for a 2013 release, is actually the company's first film... yeah, that's a great way to start up a new portfolio.

In all seriousness, though, I'm somewhat at a loss for words.

Nothing can be said about what happened that hasn't already been said at this point. I'm not even sure (or convinced, for that matter) that this will even be brought up again, but if it does, it should be an interesting look at one of the more polarizing figures in professional wrestling history... and even more interesting how, if at all, WWE would react to such a film being made, considering all their efforts to ostensibly remove all mention of Chris Benoit from their history banks. Regardless, not quite sure how to think about this other than to say, "Let's wait and see what happens."

621 - Who's Leon?

2011-12-02T13:22:00.001-05:00

"Christmas is not about being with people you like!
It's about being with your family..."

620 - YouTube changed its layout...

2011-12-02T02:26:00.000-05:00

It's meh... that is all.

Holy shit, do people actually say that?

Grrrr.....

619 - DTM Archive: 2009 In Review

2011-12-01T11:27:00.001-05:00

Original Posting Date: December 31, 2009
DTM Blog Post No. 1219

This list is nothing major, nothing special. A bunch of stuff which peaked my interest in 2009 (whether in a positive or negative light) can be found here. Nothing more noteworthy than that. And so, let's get this over and done with. Just to show hastily done this is, improper and unstable formatting is in place... and also this is a partial list for the most part.

(2011 Update: I never got around to posting the updated list, despite adding a few more things to the original text. So here it is; the complete 2009 in Review list!)

THE YEAR'S WINNERS
Some good stuff has happened to or involving these particular targets during 2009.

STAR TREK
Trekkies will debate the temporal peculiars until the end of time, but there's no doubt in my mind that this is one of the best Star Trek flicks I've seen in recent memory. Hell, even my brother thought it was excellent. Everything about this movie, from the visuals to the casting to the overall story, seems to be pretty spot on and has earned multiple views on my part. Good job, JJ. Here's hoping all of this good will I've placed on you won't be flushed down with the sequel.

(2011 Update: A shame that I didn't include the comic prequel, Countdown. An excellent miniseries, by the way.)

TERMINATOR: SALVATION
I gotta be honest. After people had trashed this movie, I had some reservations. But after watching the movie, I gotta say that this one is actually not too bad. Let's be honest: no Terminator movie is going to compare to the first two, but drop those expectations and what you'll get is a fairly servicable action flick that does a good job of entertaining the audience. And for that alone, it's on this side of the list.

AVATAR
Best viewed in 3D... probably my first 3D movie experience. Not an amazing movie by any means, but is certainly better than Titanic... yeah, that's right. The Avatar has sank the Titanic. THAT alone earns it a spot on my list.

CLASSIC GAME ROOM HD
A spin-off of the old-school Game Room webshow that originally aired in 1999-2000, this HD incarnation actually started in 2008, but I only caught wind of it this year, so it's on the list now. In fact, what a great review show this. Aside from being able to watch the old-school stuff from the earlier incarnations (which are really good), the new HD series is also good, calm, and informative with some witty moments. A top-notch show that I recommend for all your gaming reviews.

PLAYSTATION 3
What a change of fortune for the Playstation Triple, huh? It's got a new model, a new lower price, and a selection of pretty good games that can't be found on the other system (yet)... not to mention that they've got the prepaid PSN cards out, which I've used to buy some online PS1 classics for my PSP. Okay, Sony. You've sold me on your PS3 - this one actually looks nice. I'll probably pick one up... next year... for Christmas... or something. First, I'm going to invest in some Wii games that seem like they're worth the money, like...

NEW SUPER MARIO BROS. WII
A bit premature since I don't have the game yet, but having sampled it for a bit and judging from the positive praise it's been getting, I'd have to say that it's well earned its spot on this list early on. Besides, it's classic 2D Mario at its finest and you can play four players, so that's a win-win right there.

BATMAN AND ROBIN
Honestly? I dig the series. I dig the new dynamic between Dick Grayson's Batman and Damian's Robin. While it's a no-brainer that Bruce Wayne will eventually return to reclaim the mantle he created, right now, I'm just enjoying the ride that is Batman and Robin... good stuff.

THE YEAR'S LOSERS
Quite a few losers this year...

MARVEL
A black hole of creativity - there's about one or two series that's actually worth my time at the moment and you're almost left wondering when the Powers That Be will fuck those up as well.

POWER RANGERS
2009 will be the last year that new PR will produced and that's a bit of a shame. While I've seen very little of RPM - mainly the first couple episodes and some tidbits afterwards - what I have seen is very good and perhaps fitting that it should end on a fairly high note. This is one that I was debating putting on here at all, but the fact that new episodes are being cancelled and replaced with reruns of the original MMPR, however, is enough justification to make it on the Losers side of the list.

WOLVERINE
Your movie was a giant MEH. All I can say is that at least it's better than X-Men 3, but that isn't saying much. This one is just... MEH.

(2011 Update: Sorry, 2006 self. I have to disagree. X-Men Origins: Wolverine is almost on par if not WORSE than X-Men 3. Look what they did to Deadpool! Revolting!)

TRANSFORMERS
Your movie sucked even more.

STREET FIGHTER: THE LEGEND OF CHUN-LI
Oh, for fuck's sake... YOUR MOVIE SUCKED MOST! Just terrible.

TWILIGHT
Haven't seen the movies or read any of the books. But according to MovieBob, they suck. Neither the trailers for the two flicks or any of the excerpts I've read online have convinced me otherwise. Not likely to read the books or see either movies, because they look so BLAND.

(2011 Update: That didn't last long. I actually tried to read the first book in the Twilight saga and fell asleep seven pages in. Just rubbishly boring.)

THE MIDDLE GROUNDERS
Only a couple this year...

NICOTINEALIEN/ARMAKE21/BOXED ENTERTAINMENT/WHATEVER HIS NAME IS NOW
He's started up another account and towards the end of the year began uploading some of his older stuff, some of which I still find entertaining despite them just being mindless screaming matches. Of course, it'll be a matter of time before some schmuck decides to heckle him and he takes the videos down again, which makes me want to reiterate my plea from last year to find a suitable site to host his videos at. I hear Blip isn't too bad for your needs, dude. Think about it.

(2011 Update: Closed his BoxedEntertainment page and opened yet ANOTHER one... but on the other hand, there's a YT page hosting most of his old vids.)

GERALD TREMBLAY
Managed to stick around as mayor of Montreal for a third term. Too bad he sucks, but by default compared to the other candidates in the recent urban election, he was the best choice. So congrats, Mr. Mayor. Now please, please, PLEASE give us snow removal services that doesn't suck... because that's most important at the moment.

TMNT
Ended their 25th anniversary with a decent (if disappointing) video game for Wii (and PS2) as well as a surprise sale of the franchise to Nickelodeon. Not sure what to make of this, but for the most part, the Turtles are still (somewhat) marketable. So Middle Ground for you guys.

Anyway, that's it for 2009. Here's to a more-than-average 2010. Happy New Year, kids.

618 - DTM Archive: 2008 in Review

2011-12-01T11:08:00.001-05:00

Original Posting Date: December 31, 2008
DTM Blog Post No. 1078

Not much to say here, since I've already said quite a bit back then...

Generally speaking, 2008 was a bit of a mixed bag. If you were a political history whore, something magical happened down south. Otherwise, you were a Quebecer voting twice in a calendar year within a three-month span. But let's not dwell on that... the year's done. Let's move on... but not before looking back on this past year of mediocrity and historical crap.

THE YEAR'S WINNERS
Some good stuff has happened to or involving these particular targets during 2008.

BARRACK OBAMA
Newly-elected president of the United States is HALF-BLACK... he's not a BLACK MAN... he has a WHITE MOTHER... with that having been said, the election of Obama is one of historical significance and if you really need me to elaborate on this further... man, you just haven't been around here much, have you? Congratulations to Obama for the win... now let's see what he can do and then judge his worthiness to clean Bush's shit up.

(2011 Update: It's 2011... I've long since stopped caring. Wow... I really need to stop riding with the hype trains here.)

COMIC BOOK MOVIES
Out of all the Marvel movies released, Iron Man seems to be the best one. Despite not reading the original comics, I enjoyed Iron Man. It was a very slick, polished, and kick-ass movie. It's too bad Marvel's greatness with the Iron Man movie doesn't translate to their comics, which continue to suck hard. Meanwhile, I also enjoyed the Dark Knight, which seemed like a good follow-up to Batman Begins. Again, it's too bad this awesomeness wasn't around a decade ago when comics were hitting their stride (and tumbled quickly after).

WII
Yes, Nintendo. I ponied up the cash to buy one of your cutesy machines... and I gotta say, I enjoy the Virtual Console, I enjoy a couple of WiiWare games available, and Wii Sports is much more enjoyable and fun than EA Sport's annual recycled fuckfests that somehow sell a gazillion copies simply because people are stupid. While some will claim that the Wii is nothing more than a slightly better Gamecube with gimmicky controllers, the gimmick is actually a step closer to that evolution in video games than the other two systems are. Yeah, the console doesn't have any worthwhile retail releases (or at least, anything that you can't get cheaper on a PS2), but once people see the potential, they'll start churning out games... too bad the only reason I bought this was because of one game.

(On a sidenote, most hardcore gamers will cry foul at the Wii's entry onto the Winner's list when it's clear that the X-Box 360 and even the PS3 have much better games than the Wii, which mostly comprise of shovelware. I'm not going to dispute that... however, I didn't buy those systems. I bought a Wii - therefore, it's on the list. Maybe when the PS3 has some decent games worthy of my cash and when the Red Ring of Death becomes a near-permanent footnote in history, I may consider picking one of those systems up and they'll probably be on the list then. Until then... not on the list.)

MEGA MAN 9
I'll be honest. The first time I saw the trailer, I shed a tear of joy. I mean... look at it. It's 8-bit Mega Man, just the way I remember it. It's fucking awesome regardless of what anybody says. A classic return to what made Mega Man great without frivolous use of high-end graphics, sound, and stupid gimmicks like the fucking snowboarding sequences in 8... Best part is that it plays great and would have been a worthy addition to the NES library had it been released back in the day. In addition to the main game and challenges, downloadable content also included a playable Proto Man, harder difficulty settings, and an endless attack mode which places you in an endless stage to see how far you can go. Truly a wonderful piece of retro greatness even though it was made in 2008. Simply beautiful.

THE CHRIS JERICHO/SHAWN MICHAELS FEUD
For the most part, wrestling has been abysmally boring this year. But if there was any one single wrestling feud worth watching and making a DVD out of, it would be this one. Undoubtedly a candidate for - if not the undisputed - Feud of The Year, Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels not only kicked ass with their fantastic matches together, but also made you care about the angles with a cleverly booked storyline and really deep emotional stuff. It didn't have the drive or hype of another major feud that kickstart the promotion ten years ago, but it's still a wonderful story and it was very much a classic wrestling archtype instead of... whatever WWE produces these days. I have to say that there hasn't been anything this good in years coming out of the WWE braintrust - congrats to Chris and Shawn for a kick-ass storyline... keep up the good work and hope to see a sequel.

CM PUNK/JEFF HARDY
During the summer, CM Punk captured his first World title on Monday Night Raw. Just a couple weeks ago, Jeff Hardy won his first WWE title. It's absolutely amazing that despite nothing particularly special happening this year, we got new blood holding the gold. Tis a shame Punk's reign didn't last long (although longer than most people thought) and it looks like Jeff's reign won't be a long one either.

(2011 Update: Funny that I would pair these two together in the 2008 list, since the two would feud over the World Title in the summer of 2009.)

THE AVGN vs. NOLSTAGIA CRITIC DEBATE
A series of insults, fights, and reviews has resulted in a great 'Net production pitting James Rolfe's popular Nerd character against Doug Walker's newcomer Critic character. If anything, it made people more aware of ThatGuyWithTheGlasses.com and the wonderful stuff to come out of Doug's mind. Speaking of which...

THATGUYWITHTHEGLASSES.COM
Truly fucking genius, the site (and the man behind the site) has so much funny material going for it that I can't really sum it all up properly. Whether it's a critic ripping apart a nolstagic movie or a clueless bum reviewing the latest new movie, you can't go wrong with the reams of material leaking out of this site. Pure fun.

(2011 Update: This was back when TGWTG had actually enjoyable and entertaining content... which is more than what I can say for what's there now.)

THE YEAR'S LOSERS
Quite a few losers this year...

SARAH PALIN
Sarah Palin's bid for the Presidency was thankfully thwarted by Americans when they voted back in November. No doubt the world is ready for a woman to take office - imagine the support Hilary got during her campaign - but Palin's lack of knowledge on various issues makes us wish McCain picked the most stereotypically-offensive gay man to be running mate. Also, there's something about her that just irks me... oh well, we won't have to hear from her for another four months.

JOHN McCAIN
Forget the fact he lost the election - that's not why he's here. He's here because he ditched Letterman one night... and that's just bad.

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL
Oh poor Dr. Jones. Once a proud and legendary icon, he came out of cinematic retirement to be involved in a really lacking film featuring alien skulls, fake Russian villainesses, nuclear refrigerators, and finding out that banging Marion Ravenwood produced Shia LeBeouf - or however the fuck you pronounce that name - as an offspring, who is called Mutt. Yeah, that sounds... wrong. Just... no. On the other hand, it's still better than Howard The... no, I'm not playing that card.

PETA
Don't these guys have anything better to do than to do a really bloody version of Cooking Mama - you know, the one that has you beat the shit out of a turkey before cutting off his head? I mean... seriously? Cooking Mama? There're tons of other "big game hunting" simulators out there that slaughters more animals than in real life and you go after a game where people prepare meals from processed meats... seriously? I think MovieBob a.k.a. The Game Overthinker said it best: "Fuck that and fuck you, you hypocritical, sprout-mongering, bomb-throwing, people-whoring wastes of skin."

(2011 Update: Peta has struck a number of times with more knock-off titles like Super Tanooki Suit 2D, where a flying Mario is being chased by a skinned raccoon in a bloody Mushroom Kingdom... I wish I was joking.)

IRATE GAMER
This guy's on the list because he missed a few typos on his videos... you know, minor stuff that shouldn't happen when you're putting in two months of working into one skit that lasts roughly ten minutes. Yeah, I know he was on the winner list in the 2007 lookback, but a year of long delays and really subpar episodes that I could have done easily with Windows Movie Maker (just without the special effects and bluescreen crap) really turned me around on this guy. Also, the guy seems to be the inspiration for something called Bores 'N Doors, which has a bunch of YouTubers making their videos based on a scene in one of his videos... it seems to me that these guys desperately need to get a life which doesn't involve them making videos about Chris Bores and rather requires them to concentrate their efforts on making their own effective products.

ANY FUCKING CANADIAN/QUEBEC ELECTION IN 2008
Seriously, enough! The only time I want to think about an election is in four years. Maybe five. ENOUGH WITH THE ELECTIONS. When some of our forefathers died for our right to vote, I don't think they meant for this right to be abused so some moron can win a fucking popularity contest in the hopes of getting a fucking majority government. There's a reason you suddenly have high approval ratings; because you're doing things that isn't going to defeat your minority government and also because people like keeping you on a leash. Two elections passed by and NOTHING CHANGED! Enough already!

FRANK MILLER
Listen, Frank. You know how much your classic stuff is adored, but after Dark Knight Strikes Again, IDW's recent adaptation of your version of Robocop, and even your recent flick based on Will Eisner's classic Spirit comics (which I sadly admit to not seeing, but reviews have been brutal, man)... I think you can forget about anyone having anything good to say about your work these days. You have definitely lost your marbles, sir.

BRUCE KALISH
I haven't seen Jungle Fury, the latest Power Rangers series, simply because this man was involved. If that isn't enough to earn a year's worst, then I don't know what is. The good piece of news I could force out of this is that he's not coming back for the next one... which may either be a good thing or not.

(2011 Update: Wow. TWO Ranger seasons I have yet to watch... and still have no desire to watch.)

NICOTINEALIEN/ARMAKE21/WHATEVER HIS NAME IS NOW
Ooh... blasphemy, right? I'll admit it; I enjoy some of the guy's work, even though I feel he swears a bit too much. But I enjoy it... but he's already has two YouTube accounts suspended already and trying to find all his stuff is practically a full-time job in itself. Dude, you've got some good stuff there and you can take your time making top-quality stuff, but for Rolfe's sake, man, get a fucking site and consolidate everything there. I don't care if it's a page with links to the video pages, just... something! You got a ton of fans, just have something out there to let them know you're alive; not just some account on a little-known video site where the videos hardly ever load half the time.

Oh, and keep up the good work.

(2011 Update: Should have been a middle grounder here. And "for Rolfe's sake?" Are you fucking serious, bro?!)

THE MIDDLE GROUNDERS
Yes, it's the return of the middle grounders (not quite winners, not quite losers either) after making a hiatus in 2007.

NEW TMNT COMICS
Yay, Volume 4 is being started up again! Yay, it's free online! Boo, it's ten bucks (American) for a printed copy! Seriously, I don't know, but okay... whatever works.

(2011 Update: Volume 4's restart didn't last long and the TMNT property was later sold to Viacom. There's an ongoing comic from IDW written by co-creator Kevin Eastman. Not too shabby.)

THE FORCE UNLEASHED
Closest thing I'll be playing is the PS2 version and to be honest, the game is just ok. I mean, the story is fairly good, the action is decent, it's fun killing things, but the main gripe I have is that your character - who is supposed to be this bad-ass apprentice to Darth Vader - ends up turning good and getting killed at the end... sorry to spoil it for anyone who still hasn't played or heard of it, but I play a game expecting to slay Jedis on a regular basis and I end up fighting stormtroopers for the most part... still, it's a fun game - just not deserving of the hype.

SCREWATTACK.COM
Masters of the Internet? Um, yeah, okay. As much as I enjoyed their old stuff, their newer stuff is really not up to snuff. I don't know, maybe I expect too much. Oh well, at least their Video Game Vaults and Top 10s are still good... and thank god for AVGN, huh, fellas?

THE GAME HEROES
I gotta admit... there's a lot of reservation of even posting this here, but it has to be done. Honestly, TGH has done some entertaining stuff and most of their videos are actually more personable and more enjoyable than the Screwattack stuff, but these guys have got to separate their videos into individual pages. I don't mind the long loading of the videos, but whenever there's more than say one, it tends to hang my browser. Lots of win here, but that one nagging flaw kills it for me. Sorry, guys.

(2011 Update: Both sites have long since lost their luster with me, but they seem to be doing well on their own... so, yay?)

Anyway, that's it for 2008. Here's to a more-than-average 2009. Happy New Year, kids.

617 - DTM Archive: 2007 in Review

2011-12-01T10:53:00.001-05:00

Original Posting Date: January 1, 2008
DTM Blog Post No. 692

Not gonna bother with the weekly format since it's been shot to death... so here's 2007. Tread carefully and you might spot possible return entrants in the 2011 list.

Contains references to sensitive subject matter. Discretion is advised.

And so as we kiss 2007 good-bye and send it on a trip to the retirement home, we look back on some of the good and bad events that have shaped this less-than-great year. If you were around for my 2005/2006 in Review post, you'll notice that there are a few repeat offenders in this list in addition to some new ones and some of the repeats have changed their position as of late. And because of recent personal developments, I'm feeling a little black and white this year, so there's no middle ground. Just the year's winners and losers.

A word of warning: the following are my picks and my picks only. Nobody else chose these for me, nobody influenced my decision. It's based on my own personal opinions. Also, unlike the 2005 and 2006 posts, this one's being written in advanced. Which means certain references might be outdated by the time this actually sees post.

THE YEAR'S WINNERS
Some good stuff has happened to or involving these particular targets during 2007. This list is terribly short.

SCREWATTACK
Earlier this year, Screwattack got into a deal with MTV's Gametrailer sites to produce some videos for them. Nice of them to get paid for doing stuff they like. Congrats to Craig, Tom, and James for this tremendous step up... and oh yeah, they got some good vids up. So let this be a good transition to another related winner...

GAMETRAILERS
I really don't care for their usual programs, but their occasional Top 10 shows and Retrospective specials are informative, witty, and never gets boring. It's a worthwhile site to visit and you'll probably find something you'll like there.

(2011 Update: Both sites have long since lost their luster with me. Not even the Nerd vids hold a candle.)

FANTASTIC FOUR AND THE SILVER SURFER
After a craptastic first film, FF returns with a spiffy sequel that is actually quite good. And it's rated PG to boot! Who says you can't have good clean superhero fun at the movies? Oh yeah, all the other superhero franchises who decide to be all emo and moody. Even frickin' Superman was turned moody for no reason whatsoever. Only downside to this flick: no Galactus.

(2011 Update: I seemed to be in the minority, as most people hate the FF flicks. It's been a while since I saw them... I may have to revisit them in the future.)

THE FIGHT NETWORK
This seems to be the only channel I watch these days, as it features a wide range of wrestling, boxing, and MMA. For the most part, I can catch TNA shows, ROH shows, and some other wrestling shows. Even some of the MMA stuff they show is actually pretty cool, although it won't make me much of a convert. And did I mention they've got the best disclaimers in the world? If you're bored to tears with the current WWE product and can get this channel, do so. It's the best money you'll ever get.

IRATE GAMER
A YouTuber that reviews crappy games. Sounds familiar? While the model seems to be ripped from the Angry Video Game Nerd videos, Chris Bores has a unique style of his own, as he will occasionally review some decent games (his Tetris video is one of those examples) and doesn't really go overboard with his videos - instead keeping them simple save for a few brief scenes where he destroys the reviewed game in some fashion or another. Worth checking out if you have the chance.

(2011 Update: Amazing nobody cried foul on this entry considering Bores' dubiously controversial reputation. I'm amazed I'd even put him ANYWHERE on the list, let alone in the Winners bracket. But then again, I did find humor in idiot gamer sucking at a game, crying foul, and calling it a review. But yeah, this is one choice I definitely would have left off the list... maybe he'll be on this year's list.)

DR. ASHENS
Another YouTuber by the name of Dr. Ashens has started his own series of video reviews, specializing on rare and obscure electronic crap such as the knockoff Popstation and Neo-Double Games handhelds that are made in China and are barely functioning. It took me a week to get through all of his videos, but they're as funny as heck and they warrant a mention here. Nicely done, chap.

YOBO
Created a third-hand console in the FC Twin system that plays (most) NES and Super NES games. Wow! Two formats on the same console (three if you have the Super Game Boy) is a pretty sweet deal and is certainly a better alternative to spending five hundred bucks worth of hardware to re-buy games you already own off the Virtual Console.

(2011 Update: The fucker still works too... worthwhile system indeed.)

THE SIMPSONS MOVIE
While the show has been showing signs of stagnation, the movie is a thankfully relaxing breath of fresh air. Yeah, you have some of the usual gags here and there, but it's a funnier flick and the bigger budget really gives the movie that grand scope. Nothing that couldn't have been done on the small screen, but it's definitely big-screen worthy material, so it works.

JOHN CENA
Despite wearing a sling, he still managed to go to Iraq and kick Vince's ass. Sweet stuff.

(2011 Update: Yes, kids. John Cena was a Year Winner in my list. The last time it ever happened.)

THE YEAR'S LOSERS
If we're going to have winners, we'll have to have losers. And man, those losers were numerous.

THE BENOIT FAMILY TRAGEDY
Around June 2007, former WWE/WCW World champion Chris Benoit murdered his wife and child before committing suicide. Before that knowledge was known, WWE quickly cancelled their RAW show and put together a three-hour tribute to Benoit. A lot of blame was placed on drugs - which really - but it was clear that regardless of whether drugs played a role or not, the incident had brought about major repurcussions throughout the industry, including potential hearings in Congress. The WWE - obviously - has yet to make any drastic changes in their system, choosing instead to ignore the event and move on, but with said hearings looming in the distance and the later Signature Pharmacy bust that resulted in the suspension of several WWE wrestlers named in the scandal, you could tell the product was being affected. This is the only time I'm going to discuss the matter, so please respect my wishes and don't comment about it.

THE "DEATH" OF MR. MCMAHON
Vince McMahon steps into a limo which explodes seconds later, bringing RAW to a stupid end. The resulting shows were to built around who did in Mr. MacMan, but was abruptly ended due to the horrific events involving Benoit... which is probably a good thing because there was no way that could end well either way. As we would later discover, McMahon showed up and claimed he faked his death, but ended up learning that he has an illigetimate child named Hornswoggle... who's a fucking dwarf. Grand.

BOUCHARD/TAYLOR COMMISSION
Three months of touring Quebec to give xenophobes, racists, and bigots a chance to express their prejudice on anything that doesn't speak French or isn't Christian. Because Bill 101 isn't bigoted enough.

BRITNEY SPEARS COVERAGE
Britney shaves her head. Britney checks into rehab. Britney checks out of rehab. Britney loses custody of her kids... I'm sorry, but I missed the part where I'm supposed to give a shit about Britney Spears. Almost like Michael Jackson, except I haven't heard any reports of Britney's nose falling off.

ONCE A RANGER (POWER RANGERS 15TH ANNIVERSARY)
Because I don't have enough bad things to say about this episode, I'll just link the original posting and let you read my thoughts there. Mind you, I could have inducted the whole damn series, but that would imply my having watched the whole show and that would be wrong.

FORMER TREK ACTORS STARRING IN CRAPPY FAN FLICKS
Former Star Trek actors got together and did something many thought impossible: they made their own Star Trek fan film. And having seen the trailer (but not the movie itself), it looks like a nice little flick. Unfortunately, after having seen the first part of their three-part series, they should have tracked down a couple former Trek writers to come up with a good story. This story made no sense whatsoever and even after repeated viewings, I still have no clue as to what's going on here. It's just crappy. Hopefully, the next two parts will be better... otherwise, expect this entry in the 2008 In Review article.

(2011 Update: After watching the whole thing - I still don't get the story. Not so bad if it wasn't for the confusing state of the timeline. Whatever.)

TREKKIES BITCHING ABOUT NO SHATNER IN NEW TREK MOVIE
There seems to be this unwritten rule that was developed recently that there can be no Trek movie without Shatner and Nimoy together, because when word got out that Nimoy would reprise his famous role and Shatner wasn't, there seemed to be some sort of catalyst that resulted in people vowing to boycott the movie unless the filmakers inserted Shatner in his famous role as Kirk. Problem is... Kirk's dead and it's kinda pointless to bring him back just because a bunch of fanboys want him back. Even Shatner's upset and makes it a point to let everyone know about it. Whatever happened to Get A Life, Billy?

(2011 Update: Movie came and went in 2009 without Shatner in any way, shape, or form... AND IT WAS BETTER OFF. The movie needed Nimoy to justify its presence; it didn't need Shatner... and neither does the upcoming sequel.)

WRITERS' STRIKE
Sure, writers on strike means that there'll be a shortage of your favorite shows and more of those shitty reality shows, but considering the amount of crap out there burying the really sweet stuff, maybe we should just disown the writers and replace the existing programming with crap from YouTube. Just imagine: twenty-two weekly episodes of this moron screaming in front of a computer screen and banging his keyboard in a fit of rage. SMELL THE RATINGS!

BUS STRIKES
Unionized workers with high-playing jobs go on strike because they're not getting paid enough... and then they have the gall to try and garner sympathy from the victims who have to put up with the bullshit.

GEIKO CAVEMEN
Those Geiko commercials are deceiving: cavemen have trouble developing decent acting ability for low budget commercials, let alone saving money on their stone wheel insurance.

MARVEL
Kill Captain America? Smart move. Pretend Spider-Man's marriage never happened and pretend we're in the seventies again? Absolutely brilliant! Why don't we bring back Harry Osborn while we're at it? Oh wait...

So that's it. Happy 2008.

616 - DTM Archive: 2006 In Review

2011-12-01T10:05:00.001-05:00

Original Posting Date: January 1, 2007
DTM Blog Post No. 400

Yeah, it's been a while. But then again, there's only three more years to repost unless I decide to give 2010 the updated treatment. Who knows?

Post 400. New Year. Hope everyone's sober. Good.

And so as we kiss 2006 good-bye and send it on a trip to the retirement home, we look back on some of the good, bad, and tweener events that have shaped this great year. If you were around for my 2005 in Review post, you'll notice that there are a few repeat offenders in this list in addition to some new ones and some of the repeats have changed their position as of late.

A word of warning: the following are my picks and my picks only. Nobody else chose these for me, nobody influenced my decision. It's based on my own personal opinions. Also, unlike the 2005 post, this one's being written in advanced. Which means certain references might be outdated by the time this actually sees post. So without further delay, let's get it on.

THE YEAR'S WINNERS
Some good stuff has happened to or involving these particular targets during 2006.

ANGRY NINTENDO/VIDEO GAME NERD
Earlier this year, I came across a website called screwattack.com, a gaming site apparently. While the content is alright, the one thing that caught my eye was a series of NES reviews produced a guy who refers to himself as the Angry Nintendo Nerd (aka Angry Video Game Nerd). The language is intense, but the portrayal of this character depicts the kind of experiences I've had with certain games (TMNT and Simon's Quest among them). They're also funny as hell, particularly his inventive use of profanity. Definitely worth a look if you're not easily offended.

(2011 Update: If only James Rolfe had stuck with more intimate, personable experiences in his videos as opposed to cookie-cutter, low-grade "acting" that would make Troll 2 seem like Shakespeare in comparison. Even today, the 2006 Nerd episodes are still the best of the bunch, whereas the majority thereafter have long since lost their luster after a couple years.)

SUPERMAN
The Man of Steel returns to form with the recent Superman Returns flick - a movie that is very well done but is admittingly an acquired taste. In addition, you've got the old movies re-re-rereleased on DVD, as well as the long-time debut of the Richard Donner version of Superman II, which is very good by the way. If there was any doubt that 2006 was good to Superman, I ain't seen it.

THE ZIDANE HEADBUTT (World Cup 2006 Finals)
It may have caused a riot among the sporting world, but I can't think of a better way to end your career than to give a loudmouth Italian soccer player exactly what he needed to shut the fuck up, even if it gave Italy the World Cup. Mr. Zidane, I salute you.

BATTLESTAR GALACTICA
Recently started to follow this series and am now starting to get into it. This is a great drama that happens to be set in outer space, the production values are top-notch, and the plots feel pretty gritty and realistic. Kudos to the people behind this show for putting out a great product.

(2011 Update: Eventually lost interest in the series and rediscovered the original... THAT was pretty fun to watch.)

STAR TREK
The sci-fi franchise just turned forty this year. As a result, we got a new movie announcement, some top-notch novels, a fan's excellent interpretation of a rebooted Trek universe, and the remastered Original Series, containing clean footage and upgraded special effects. Despite the lack of new shows or new material, Trek is all the better for it.

FORMER TREK ACTORS STARRING IN FAN FLICKS
Former Star Trek actors got together and did something many thought impossible: they made their own Star Trek fan film. And having seen the trailer (but not the movie itself), it looks like a nice little flick. Also, you've got another fanfilm series, New Voyages, snatching up the services of former Trek people who worked on the TV shows. This may be good for fanfilms to get much needed credibility... that is, if they don't get shut down before then.

(2011 Update: Somewhere down the line, Tim Russ gathered a bunch of Trek alumni to make a Trek fanfilm - not that bad, actually - that he insists isn't a fanfilm. Whatever you say, man.)

MORTAL KOMBAT
The bloodiest piece of crap I've ever played has definitely stepped up with its latest release, Armageddon. Well over sixty characters, this game is almost like Mortal Kombat Trilogy, except that it's actually a good game and there's some actual effort behind the game. No complaints here!

(2011 Update: The new MK released this year is an even bloodier piece of crap... and I mean that as a compliment.)

MY X-BOX COLLECTION
50 games within a two-year period. Not much of an accomplishment by anyone else's standards, but a pretty big deal for me because it's the first time I owned 50 games for a single console. Next up, getting a Playstation-2 (yes, I said 2, not 3) and building up a favorable PS2 library... which'll probably be four or five games at most.

(2011 Update: I guess 2006 me had low expectations. Seriously, if you were to tell me back then that I would amass well over 750+ games for a multitude of consoles in five years, I'd call you a fucking idiot.)

NEW CHAIR
I gotta new chair. Yay.

THE YEAR'S LOSERS
If we're going to have winners, we'll have to have losers. And man, those losers were numerous.

FREEWEBPAGE.ORG
A lack of helpful/timely communication concerning a undesirable situation had prompted the brief shutdown and eventual relocation of the Webstation to its current home. As much as I am appreciative of FWP for hosting the site for a good while, I'm also rather pissed at how the relationship ended and how this situation could have been resolved properly. That said, I'm not going to bitch on them much.

(2011 Update: What a genius I was... moving onto a web service that offered 100 MB free space, but bombarded the site with ads to the point where the design was practically destroyed. This is part of the reason why I gave up personalizing websites and stuck with the blog.)

X-MEN: THE LAST STAND
This movie sucked major X-Ass; a pitiful end to what was generally an awesome trilogy of X-Men films. Nothing more really needs be said.

(2011 Update: Except for the fact that the follow-up X-Men Origins: Wolverine was somehow just as bad, if not worse. Fortunately, First Class turned things around.)

X-BOX 360
The truly disappointing aspect of this system, which sports a nice look and sweet-looking controllers, is that it breaks down, a sign indicated by what some people have dubbed the RED RING OF DOOM! I never played the system, but judging from the negative reviews I've read up on, it's hard to ignore these problems. Of course, it doesn't help that some of the games on the system are less than stellar and could have been done on the original X-Box.

(2011 Update: A redesigned Xbox 360 was eventually released. That seemed to work fine.)

DISGRUNTLED TREK ACTORS
Some former Star Trek actors must have gotten together and decreed that all prequels are bad and that the show is about moving forward, yet backpedaled on those comments by saying they'd love to reprise their roles in future films. How utterly sad and pathetic have these people gone down the totem ladder. Maybe they should take a page from Tim Russ' book and make their own movie. It's sort of ironic that the former Enterprise actors, the ones who have every right to complain considering how their show ended, are the exact opposite (for the most part) of their adolescent peers. That doesn't happen every day.

(2011 Update: Most everybody in that disgruntled Trek fraternity seemed to like the 2009 Star Trek movie... which went back to the days of Kirk and Spock and can be considered either a prequel and/or a reboot. Funny how that works.)

ECW
Last year, I had made ECW a 2005 Winner for their awesome DVD documentary and one-time PPV revival. One year later, the brand is reborn and refurbished into what is essentially a one-hour weekend show that somehow airs on Tuesday nights on a network that airs science fiction programs. As a result, it's about as new a breed as the XFL was an X-tra Fun League (read: it's not). The reality, though, is that the show isn't that bad and there are times when you think the show is indeed a new offering, but then they throw in something stupid like Extreme Strip Poker and suddenly you're reminded that you're watching another sports-entertainment crapfest. Considering what was expected and what was hoped, ECW hasn't lived up to those expectations. I think their December to Disappoint PPV proves it.

(2011 Update: The only real good to come out of this Bobbited ECW is that it introduced the mainstream to CM Punk, who is currently enjoying well-deserved fruits of his labor... along with several cans of Pepsi.)

POWER RANGERS: SPD
Now I know what you're thinking now: "SPD was last year's show, you dumb-ass! This year's show was called Mystic Force!" And that may be true, but I didn't watch Mystic Force AT ALL this year and that's due to the fact that SPD left such a bad taste in my mouth that I shudder to think what the producer could have come up with it. For the most part, like SPD, reaction is mixed (although slightly better), but not enough to have me check it out. So rather than give the nod to a show I've never seen, I give the nod to the show that left the sour taste in my mouth.

(2011 Update: Strangely enough... I still haven't seen Mystic Force.)

ANTI-WWE PROTESTS
Citizens in Indonesia stage an anti-WWE protest including burning Undertaker posters and ripped HHH posters. The incident stem from an incident where three kids "practice wrestling moves" on another kid, who died a month later. If there's anyone who needs to be ripped and burned, it's the kid's father who waited a week to get treatment. Regardless of what reasons or goals lies within these protests - staged or otherwise - it is certainly a pitiful sight to behold.

KEVIN FEDERLINE
America's Most Hated? Hollywood Bad Boy? Britney's Ex? One-night-only wrestler? And yet the only thing I ask myself whenever this guy is brought up is this one simple question: Who the fuck is Kevin Federline and why is he taking up precious TV time?

(2011 Update: Who the fuck is Kevin Federline? And how did he make that list?)

MARVEL'S CIVIL WAR
If only real wars were constantly delayed by a comic book writer's apparent laziness would things be right in the world, but alas that's not the case. The truly sad thing is that the constant delays is losing my interest and I just want this thing over and done with so we can get some decent Spider-Man stories out instead of the crossover I've been force-fed as of late. And speaking of Spider-Man...

SPIDER-MAN'S WEINER
In an issue of Spider-Man: Reign (a miniseries depicting a harsh future ala Dark Knight Returns), a brief snippet of Peter Parker's "little guy" can be seen. Never knew how small the guy had it.

(2011 Update: Despite the "exposure" of Little Peter, Spider-Man: Reign is actually pretty decent.)

MIDDLE GROUND
Things that are neither winners or losers, but deserve mention. Not as many as there were in 2005, but still a handful.

SNAKES ON A PLANE
So much internet hype fueled the anticipation for an admittingly-corny movie and yet so little to show for it in terms of box office. Maybe the DVD sales will be better.

(2011 Update: It's not a bad movie - it's pretty corny, as expected. But it's an entertaining popcorn flick if nothing else.)

WWE FILMS
People have criticized it and thought it was a bad idea. In reality, though, it's not much of a stretch and I truly believe WWE Films can work. While the first two theatrical releases weren't box-office hits by any stretch of the imagination, they did show how far the company is willing to go to present a top-notch film. Make no mistake: See No Evil is far from a good horror flick (I believe I called the best comedy I've seen all year), but it's still a nice looking picture. The Marine looks like all explosions and no substance, but at least it has big explosions. All that's needed for people to take WWE Films seriously is if the division can produce more than simple bland popcorn flicks and that can be done by hiring people who can actually write.

STAR WARS FANS
Nerds rejoiced when word of the original Star Wars trilogy would be returning to DVD in its original format. Yes, kids. See Han Shoot First. Unfortunately, when people actually picked up the DVDs, they cried fowl because the original original trilogy's DVD presentation was seemingly ripped from the old Laserdisc versions. Sometimes, you need the Force to keep those geeks happy. Why isn't this a Loser item? Beats me.

(2011 Update: Five years later, Star Wars comes out on Blu-Ray... not much has changed as far as fan reaction goes to the latest bevy of changes.)

PEOPLE WHO COMPLAIN ABOUT VIDEO GAME CONTENT
On the one hand, these people bring attention to games concerning "controversial" content and petitions to get them off shelves. On the other hand, they're giving the game free publicity, prompting consumers to actually buy the product. It defeats the whole purpose.

KURT ANGLE IN TNA WRESTLING
It's a middle ground candidate because on the one hand, Kurt Angle signing with TNA was one of the best-kept secrets in the world of professional wrestling in recent years and it did what it aimed to do; create shockwaves. On the other hand, you have to wonder if Kurt is feeling up to this, considering his health issues and all that. Nonetheless, it'll be interesting to see what TNA has in store for the former WWE World Champion.

WORLD CUP SOCCER TOURNAMENT
Not the biggest soccer fan in the world, but I do watch a couple games every now and then. For the most part, there have been some memorable moments, but not enough to make the tourney a winner in my eyes. Especially after stuff like this.

ROCKY BALBOA
The sixth and supposedly final film in the Rocky movie series, meaning that Rocky VII: Adrian's Revenge will never surface (and if you've seen the movie, you'll know why). While this movie is a good one and is a perfect swan song for Rocky Balboa, my only complaint is that it isn't called Rocky VI, thus ruining a perfectly consistent string of sequel titles.

And that's about it. There was another target I was considering, but Ultimately it was best not to give him more attention than he already has...

So that's it. Happy 2007.

615 - Vintage Cinemassacre Film From 1993 is BETTER than 2009-2011 AVGN.

2011-11-30T12:11:00.001-05:00

http://cinemassacre.com/2011/11/28/the-green-monster-that-walked-into-my-house-1993/

From 1993, watch a very young James Rolfe fight against a toy monster. Much more entertaining and better produced than the last couple years worth of AVGN episodes... Yes, I truly believe that.

614 - Nice...

2011-11-29T09:58:00.001-05:00

Another surprisingly decent RAW despite still being in the Johnny Ace era. Some quick bullet-points:

- Show opens with a Piper's Pit segment, where Roddy slaps John Cena in an attempt to cull out some anger from Cena over fans' reaction. Pretty interesting if they go anywhere with it, but it will most likely be forgotten in a couple weeks and Cena will continue to smile at losing matches. On the other hand, it's always cool to see Roddy Piper... as long as he's cutting promos and not wrestling matches.

- So let me get this straight; John Morrison can survive a limo explosion without a scratch, but is unable to fend off against the Miz? I would understand if it were the "When The Fuck Am I Debuting" Brodus Clay (the fat NXT guy) doing the deed, but Miz?

- Another decent Orton/Ziggler match... let's have Ziggler drop the U.S. title to Zack Ryder or whoever so that he can move on to bigger and better things. Maybe a WWE Title shot... or even a World Title reign that lasts more than ten minutes.

- Nice promo work from Daniel Bryan Danielson to hype up tonight's steel cage match for the World Title. Nice touch with the leg kick too.

- Solid TV main event between Punk and Del Rio. Happy to see that Punk has managed to retain his title and not have to drop it back to the cartoon.

That's all I got... decent show.

613 - Pac-Man Collection (for GBA)

2011-11-27T11:28:00.001-05:00

612 - Where's My WWE 12 Manual?

2011-11-23T13:12:00.001-05:00

611 - It's Snowing... and other things

2011-11-23T10:59:00.001-05:00

Yeah, I woke up this morning and saw the block covered in snow. And to think, I went to bed 3 a.m. and the place was clean as a sheet... oh well. It was fun while it lasted... I guess I have to contend with snow and stupid idiots to finish off my Christmas shopping. Good thing it's almost done...

I'm currently rendering a vlog regarding an interesting observation made over WWE 12. Will upload it soon.

610 - Much better

2011-11-22T17:14:00.001-05:00

Managed to watch last night's RAW and I have to admit that the show is far better than it has been in recent weeks. If anything, the wrestling is certainly a notch above what they've been doing... but then again, if there were two guys you could put together and get a top-notch wrestling match, it'd be CM Punk and Dolph Ziggler. I'm certainly happy that Punk is getting another go-around with the strap (even if he doesn't get around to dumping the piece of shit and bringing a new title belt in) and Dolph Ziggler is certainly earning my interest every time he works a match. Here's hoping he gets a shot at main event status somewhere down the line because I have a feeling that they haven't even scratched the surface of Ziggler's potential.

As far as the other couple matches on there, Zack Ryder continues to lose matches (but I'd be lying if I said he wasn't entertaining in his losses), the Barrett/Kingston match was alright, and the Cody/Santino squash was nothing to write home about. If there was one thing I must compliment the booking on, it's that all the finishes were clean here. Nice to see the creative team pull the reigns on nonsensical stunt bookings and just let the wrestlers tell the story.

Low points? Well, Johnny Ace is a bore, Johnny Cena is a whore, and no more Awesome Truth... because Truth got suspended... oops.

Overall, a stark improvement over previous weeks worth of RAW. Well done.

609 - WWE 12, Wii Differences

2011-11-22T12:30:00.001-05:00

GameFAQS user Jason Hart Maivia has posted a rather comprehensive list of items regarding the Wii version of WWE 12. From what I understand, it's more like an incremental update to last year's WWE Smackdown vs RAW 2011 game than a re-invention of the wheel like the more powerful console versions. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised all things considered. I may still pick this one up because I've got all the other ones... so why not.

The full (mostly unformatted) list can be seen after the break.

A LOT of info, personally tested.
Played on the Legends difficutly, because the other difficulties are too easy, and the CPU don't do as much.

-Graphics are the same as 2011 on the Wii.

-There are NO graphical "enhancements" whatsoever, which is more proof that I am correct about incorrect info on Nintendo-specific websites and magazines.

-The same ugly audience as 2011.

-Some wrestlers have the same character models as 2011 on Wii (like Mark Henry...by the way, he's still not the right size)

-There is no weight detection that affects gameplay. So, someone, like Christian or Cody Rhodes can still lift and suplex the Big Show just any other superstar, but it does show you "struggling" by having the move executed a tiny bit slower. It looks like another idea that was left incomplete that could be used more effectively in WWE '13 probably.

-Commentators still says a lot of the same stuff from 2011, but there are new bits thrown in, which is nice.

-No Create an Arena

-No Superstar Threads

-No ring rope physics (they don't move when someone gets slammed, etc.)

-Only a handful of wrestlers have the Comeback ability and are the only ones featured on the short list in Create A Move-Set mode

-"Updated" Titantrons and MiniTrons are in, but they're really pixlated and ugly, like 2011 on Wii

-Wrestlers do fight a bit more aggressively, but only because they don't stay on the ground as long. The game is still easy as pie on Legendary difficulty mode.

-Wake Up taunts are in, but only work when you have a Finisher. You can choose your Wake up Taunt in Create a Move-Set.

-Not every move can be interrupted, like the majority of the top rope/turnbuckle moves.

-No Highlight Reel replays

-No custom trons

-It has the same Create A Wrestler mode that's been present since SvR 2008 (same parts). I really don't understand why they won't update this. You can pretty much recreate your 2011 Wii CAW. There are no new parts added.

-There's new crowd signs to choose from when creating your wrestler.

-You can now choose 4 parts for your announced name during your entrance. So, if you choose "Cloud", "Sofia, "X", "14", then that's what the announcer will say, but it's pretty bad... "CLOUD!!...SOFIA!!..X!!..14!!"

-Commentators can also call you by a few new names, but it's mostly just some new ones added to the 2011 list.

-Layla also looks pretty bad. Did they not try to match her face to the real thing??

-No Online modes of any kind

-No Superstar Threads

-Cody Rhodes does have his mask

-You only need to press the A button on Classic Controller to do pins when your opponent is lying on the ground.

-Sadly, top rope and springboard flying moves do not pin

-A few new moves and animations added (FINALLY, a decent Brainbuster), but it's mostly the same as 2011. For some reason, they've added a lot of newly animated Spinebusters. Some of these were probably just DLC moves from Xbox360 and PS3. Some of the new animations still look kinda bad.

-Alberto del Rio looks nothing like him in real life. He looks and moves like a wacky cartoon character.

-Weapons (chairs, ladders, tables, etc.) still doesn't have physics applied, so it's the same as 2011 on Wii.

-Titles still aren't the correct sizes

-You can change shows brands and the arena that's used for every week, but you have to do it on the Edit Brand and Edit Schedule screens. It will save, so you only need to do this once. (For example: You can change Raw's Logo to WCW, set roster and championships, set the name of the brand and the show, choose the Nitro arena...now every week on Mondays, it will be WCW (the new brand) at the Nitro arena (the new weekly show).

-In Universe Mode, after a match, you have the option to rematch, quit, or jump straight into the next match on the card.

-C.M. Punk does have his new tron and music. He has no alternate attire - just his Black and Yellow trunks. No shirt.

-Gamecube support is in.

-There's a glitch where sometimes the reversal icons (R Button) don't pop up, so a lot of the time, you'll just be guessing when to press the R button.

-A lot of wrestlers still have moves that they should have, and you will still see a lot of running spinning DDTs.

-Created Moves are sometimes really glitchy. They will sometimes warp your character into position. For some moves,you'll sometimes see your opponent clipping through the mat or your wrestler. Needs to be fixed for WWE '13

-The sound effects sounds a bit downsampled and of lower quality, especially the audience and announcer, but nothing major, though it may also be the same on Xbox360 and PS3.

-Even though you can break some moves, a lot of times, it will not work and you'll just go right through them. You'll still hear the sound effect of you connecting a strike, but the move will sometimes still continue as if nothing happened. It's nothing at all like the Day of Reckoning games on Gamecube.

-Sometimes, weapon strikes will go through your opponent.

-Most of the time, the CPU just stands there and stares when you do a Custom Finisher in a match with more than 2 wrestlers, but they can be broken with a human player.

-You no longer trip and fall when low on stamina. Instead, your wrestler simply walks instead of run. You can still trip and fall if your legs are critically injured.

-If your head is in a critically injured state, there's a chance that you may stand up groggy.

-AI is still dumb at times. They'll irish whip you into the turnbuckles, put you in the tree of woe, or set you on the top rope, and just stand there... They be also irish whip you into the ropes, but do nothing on the rebound and let you run past them.

-Everyone seems to have a Side Russian Legsweep. I mean EVERYONE. It's probably the most used move in the game along with the Running Spinning DDT

Overall, this game is just a minor upgrade to 2011 with a roster update. There's still a bunch of problems present, and the missing modes and graphics makes it feel like it's only half the game that it should have been. I don't expect to see the Wii version getting any 9s.

608

2011-11-20T22:51:00.001-05:00

"Pigeons don't talk!
All they do is crap!"

607 - My GBA Collection

2011-11-20T14:13:00.001-05:00

606 - Capcom to release Super Street Fighter II on Virtual Console... AGAIN

2011-11-20T10:26:00.001-05:00

Source Article: http://www.joystiq.com/2011/11/12/super-street-fighter-ii-coming-to-virtual-console-with-online-mu/

In a nutshell, Capcom Unity announced that they would port the Sega Genesis/Mega Drive version of Super Street Fighter II over to Nintendo's Wii Virtual Console at a future date. I find it pretty laughable that Capcom would consider releasing ANOTHER version of Super Street Fighter II onto the Virtual Console, especially a port of a game that has already been on the VC for a couple years already.

Oh well, I guess if you care about the possible inclusion of online play, it might be worthwhile... but then again, there's already a very good fighter on the Wii with online play. It's called Tatsunoko Vs. Capcom.

Just saying...

605 - Sonic Waits For Death...

2011-11-20T01:11:00.001-05:00

A quick thing I tossed together... collection vid, coming soon.

604 - Matt Hardy KICKED OUT of Rehab... Back To Jail He Goes

2011-11-19T02:08:00.001-05:00

From tmz.com... the source article can be read here... and the follow-up article here.

Just sad.

603 - DTM Archive: 2005 In Review

2011-11-18T03:31:00.001-05:00

Original Posting Date: December 31, 2005
DTM Blog Post No. 200

DTM Blog ended 2005 with its 200 post, less than two years old at the time. And yet, here we are with a 2+ year old blog and 600 posts. Amazing what a better blogging interface will do for you.

So yeah, this is it. The 200th post of DTM Blog is conveniently the final post of 2005. And believe me, as much as I want to piss on the past year for all the stupid things I had to put up with, I really can't. So I won't. But I'll just take the time to say thanks to those who have bothered to read this thing. And I hope that you stick around for the next year (or at the very list the next hundred posts), where there'll be more of me rambling. But then, that's all the blog has ever really been about, isn't it?

And so as we kiss 2005 good-bye and send it on a trip to the retirement home, we look back on some of the good, bad, and tweener events that have shaped this great year.

A word of warning: the following are my picks and my picks only. Nobody else chose these for me, nobody influenced my decision. It's based on my own personal opinions.

THE YEAR'S WINNERS
Some good stuff has happened to or involving these particular targets during 2005.

DTM666
Finally able to drive a car this year! DVDs a la masse. A quick trip to Niagara Falls and Ottawa left me refreshed... even though I brought back no souvenirs. DANG!

BATMAN
This year's Batman Begins movie has its flaws, but at least it purges away the bad taste of the Dark Knight's previous ventures into movie crapdom. On the other hand, the movie gave way for the crappy Batman cartoon on TV right now, but you can't win them all. Fortunately, the comics were somewhat readable and that's winner in my book.

STAR WARS
To use a cliche the likes of which you've never seen in your life, the Force was strong in 2005. The Battlefront video game kicked ass, the Battlefront II video game annihilated ass, the Clone Wars cartoon blasted ass, the Episode III movie smoked ass, the Episode III video game burnt ass, and the long-awaited DVD release of the original Star Wars trilogy (and the documentary packaged with it) killed ass like none before it. If you're gonna end a saga, end it with style... and pray that the upcoming TV show doesn't suck ass.

(2011 Update: Nothing ever came of that TV show as of yet, but we did get a CGI Clone Wars cartoon... that was kinda cool.)

KURT ANGLE
Man, that promo he gave on the last RAW of 2005 kicked ass... it's true it's true.

(2011 Update: Shortly after, he'd win a World title and drop it to Rey Mysterio for the pity title reign... he would soon jump to TNA, where he currently resides today.)

JOHN CENA AND DAVE BATISTA
Both have held their titles since Wrestlemania 21, which is an already incredible feat. And in my opinion, they've done pretty well thus far. Despite what the general audience and "insider fans" think of either one of these individuals, I sincerely hope that they make to Wrestlemania 22 with their title reigns intact.

(2011 Update: Both men would lose their titles before the show... but Cena would get his back, along with ten more. As for Batista, he'd stick around for a bit before bailing.)

DC
The Identity Crisis miniseries was a huge departure from the usual borefests they've been churning out. The Infinite Crisis series, currently in progress, looks to be pure actionfest, but can't really complain about that.

(2011 Update: A shame that they had to go through fifty more "Crisis" events before hitting the eventual Flashpoint series that served as the catalyst that would give birth to the relaunched New 52 initiative.)

ECW
Aside from an awesome DVD documentary detailing the rise and fall of the promotion featuring "garbage wrestling", Extreme Championship Wrestling had a live PPV. And guess what? It was actually pretty good for what it was.

JOEY STYLES
Trade in "Slobberknockers" for "OH MY GOD!" on RAW? That can only be a GOOD THING!

(2011 Update: Too bad it didn't last long. Instead, we got stuck with Michael Cole.)

MICROSOFT
Since having gotten an X-Box last year for Christmas, Microsoft has been getting a fair share of my money as I've been picking up a slew of games that would normally take a guy of my income rate longer to accumulate. It's all about cheap prices and good deals... and oh yeah, they released XBox 360 or something.

THE YEAR'S LOSERS
If we're going to have winners, we'll have to have losers. And man, those losers were numerous.

DTM666
Couldn't get a decent webstation design, fanfic took forever to finish, among other stupidities. Hopes to change all that in the forthcoming year.

POWER RANGERS: SPD
Sad thing is that I haven't even watched the show since previewing the first couple episodes and reviews of later episodes would prevent me from giving it another chance. I did catch SPD's finale, which failed to impress. Sad when I had to resort to fanfiction to get my PR fix. In any event, I'll give Bruce Kalish the benefit of the doubt and look forward to see what he does with Mystic Force, which is the next incarnation of Power Rangers. The benefit of the doubt, however, does not mean that SPD is a loser with the rest of them.

(2011 Update: I've sort of mellowed on SPD in recent years. I still think it's a pretty poor series, but compared to what came after, I think it's fairly decent.)

RALPHIE
Unfortunately, my friend and once-great source of WWE PPVs no longer buys them because he doesn't like the existing product, thus ending my best means of getting access to PPVs. In fact, he seemed to have shut off by the product altogether, which doesn't help matters either way. On the other hand, I'm getting most of my DVDs from him for much cheaper than usual.

WWE
So with Ralphie as a loser, no doubt Vince McMahon's wrestling utopia would be the next candidate, right? The shows aren't the problem; the problem are the PPVs, which have slowly declined somewhat in quality and marquee value. Then again, you could throw in the exploding lowriders and former referee suicide angles in for good measure. Despite releasing some quality DVD sets that I've spent money on, it's not enough to drudge them from the loser brackets. If it means anything, the product isn't terrible, but it could have been a lot better.

(2011 Update: The 2005 product seems like a godsend compared to the current late-2011 product.)

NEW ORLEANS
Natural destructive forces have crippled this once-great city. No doubt, the city will be rebuilt some day and the people will prosper, but the scars will remain.

(2011 Update: Not meant to be offenseive here, but you can hardly call a terrible disaster a winning highlight. At least the city has long since recovered... but no doubt the scars still remain.)

CEMETERY WRESTLING
The new passtime in backyard wrestling is wrestling in a cemetery. Unfortunately, the pioneers of this stupidity neglected to take note that such stupidity had been done by WCW years ago. Unlike WCW, these guys got arrested for it. Just as well.

MUHAMMAD HASSAN
Consider the sad saga of someone who was considered to be the next big heel in WWE. Despite my early misgivings of the character, I was rather impressed with his skills on the mic as well as in the ring. Poor backstage decision-making and poor timing, however, ended his run before he could have really made an impact and that's too bad. On the bright side, he's a Gooker Award nominee!

UNFORTUNATE iPOD OWNERS
Certain people expecting iPods for Christmas probably got the limited-edition iMeat instead. A bait-and-switch to the extreme! Vince Russo would be so proud barring his born-again shtick.

JIM ROSS
Poor ol' JR got fired (not literally), kicked in the balls, and most importantly, got stuff pulled out of his ass. On the bright side, he's a Gooker Award nominee!

MIDDLE GROUND
Things that are neither winners or losers, but deserve mention.

STAR TREK
The fourth season of Enterprise was considered to be one of its finest, finally doing what it was supposed to - but it wasn't enough to keep this show from getting canned. Unfortunately, the show ended with a depressingly awful finale that was more akin to being a TNG episode... and a bad one too. It's one of those things you could have called either way, but felt either choice was inappropriate.

GEORGE TAKEI
The winner aspect: George Takei steps out of the closet and declares his homosexuality to the world. The loser aspect: the fact that Sulu's gay is possibly the worst kept secret in the world. You had that nagging feeling, but never really thought about it. And now that it's out, you really don't want to. Let's call it even.

EXCLUSIVE SPORTS VIDEO GAMES
EA Sports started the ball by getting exclusive license to make NFL games. This means no one else can use NFL teams and likenesses. On the one hand, it sort of sucks because you no longer have a choice to which kind of football game you prefer. But on the other hand, it filters out all the shittier games on the market. It's too early to tell, so let's call it even.

EDDIE GUERRERO
A great talent who had left us so soon. I've said my piece on Eddie and frankly, so has everyone else. So I won't add anymore to what everyone already know or can easily find elsewhere. I can't give Eddie the Winner ballot, but I can give him honorable mention here. (There's the tribute site too).

THE NEW NHL
The winner aspect: the NHL is back in operation and the players seem to be motivated to play again. The loser aspect: not enough incentive for me to want to watch the games, since the couple games I have seen somewhat resemble the old NHL games. Eh, call it even.

DAD
The winner aspect: my father got his kidney stone removed and is feeling better. The loser aspect: he never got to keep the kidney stone as a souvenir. Hey, gotta nail him with something.

And that's about it. There was another target I was considering, but ultimately it was best not to give him more attention than he already has...

So that's it. See next year (and by next year, I mean tomorrow.)

Happy 2006.

602 - PETA Targets Mario For Murder... Two Decades Late

2011-11-17T14:00:00.001-05:00

Source article: http://www.lensoftruth.com/peta-targets-mario-for-murder/

Animal rights group PETA claims Mario promotes skinning of animals with his Tanooki Suit. Here are a few quotes that speak out against Nintendo’s legendary trademark plumber straight from their website.

“When on a mission to rescue the princess, Mario has been known to use any means necessary to defeat his enemy—even wearing the skin of a raccoon dog to give him special powers. Tanooki may be just a ‘suit’ in Mario games, but in real life, tanuki are raccoon dogs who are skinned alive for their fur.”

“By wearing Tanooki, Mario is sending the message that it’s OK to wear fur. Play Super Tanooki Skin 2D and help Tanooki reclaim his fur!”

To us, this seems to be a bit silly to say the least. I mean of all of the problems in the world that they could address, why bother with a fictional game character that has been harmless to their cause for well over a decade? Are they hurting for publicity so bad that they actually have to make ridiculous spins on such pointless topics just to get attention?

Is it a valid complaint? What are your thoughts?

Facepalm Central indeed... I think animals would rather die than be represented by a bunch of whackos. The really sad thing is that they waited two decades to piss on Mario for Tanooki slaughter; Super Mario Bros. 3 was the first game to introduce that ability, as well as frog slaughter... wait, dude. Don't give them any more ideas.

However... according to this article, PETA claimed that the dig was a joke... right. The only joke in this thing is the organization that came up with it.

601 - Foley Defends "This Is Your Life" - Not Buying It

2011-11-16T12:34:00.001-05:00

From wrestlenewz.com;

- A fan wrote to Foley on Twitter last night saying that the point behind his RAW segment with John Cena and The Rock was for people to hate it. Foley replied: “Exactly – the segment with @JohnCena was so bad it was good, and @TheRock put it out of its misery. Mr Cena was CLASSIC though!”

No, Mick. Just no.

The segment wasn't "so bad it's good" bad. It was "Jesus H. Christ, where's that gun at so I can blow my brains out?" bad... okay, a bit stretching, but it was pretty bad. The 1999 Kennel From Hell match between Al Snow and Big Bossman, a match that came about because Bossman kidnapped (then cooked) Al Snow's pet Chihuahua and is the only match of its kind for a variety of reasons? That's an example of "so bad it's good." This was just bad and only served to remind me of days gone by.

600th Post And This Is All I Have To Show For It...

2011-11-14T12:05:00.001-05:00

A bunch of quickie comments and updates... oh well, I guess it's better than a lame ass picture or something.

- Last night's three hour RAW, which was dubbed RAW GETTING ROCKED or whatever despite The Rock showing up for a couple minutes at most, was not very good. Did not catch the whole show, but only saw a few clips online. Most notably, I found myself facepalming at Mick Foley's pathetic attempt at a "This Is Your Life" with John Cena (clearly, Mick has had better days with the concept) as well as anything involving Johnny Laryngitis. Let's be honest here, kids; when DWAYNE "THE FUCKING ROCK" JOHNSON cannot get me excited about a PPV or even RAW, then something has to be seriously wrong here. I guess it's back to the DVDs for me.

- Thinking back, what did WWE do for a go-home RAW to push last year's Survivor Series? They did a pretty fun and kick-ass "old-school" themed show, ending with a pretty cool Roddy Piper promo that made you want to buy into the upcoming PPV's main event. The truly sad thing about this year's RAW GETTING CROCKED is that you'd think a show with a rare ROCK appearance and Mick Foley's return to WWE would do SOMETHING... ANYTHING to be fun and entertaining... but all they seem to care about is getting stuff to trend on Twitter.

Okay... moving right along...

- Will be working out a possible schedule for upcoming videos to be uploaded on the YouTube channel for the remainder of 2011. For those who haven't seen the latest VLOG, I mentioned that I had a few videos on the table, but for the most part, will be working to build that back catalogue for the future. In any case, I figure now would be a good time to put out the table scraps before getting fresh material out... and I do have a couple new vids planned for the holidays.

- On the subject of future collection videos, I'm seriously considering doing some of these; possibly starting off with overviews of the various clone systems at my disposal before eventually moving on to the collections themselves. The unlikely source of inspiration comes from a recent "Kenny" review of the FC3 Plus clone system, which is actually a decent review in and of itself... if not a bit lacking in some details. In fact, don't be surprised if I provide my own commentary track on the review... along with another potential commentary track.

That's all I got going...